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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To stop daughter from attending Xmas sleepover?

61 replies

thenewduchessofhastings · 12/12/2021 21:13

What would you do?

16 year DD in year 11;has a end of term sleep over planned on Friday night at her friends house.

There'll be 5 of them there all in very close proximity in the same bedroom.

Two weeks ago we had a letter emailed to us by her school from the local council asking parents to support them by keeping transmission rates down.

Some of the advice in that letter was to reconsider allowing our children to attend indoor events,parties and sleepovers.

DD's friends parents are two of the most sensible people I know and are happy to allow the sleepover to go ahead but we've a huge rise in this new variant in the city we live in and we've always had issues with high Covid rates here.

If DD gets Covid it'll be a miserable Christmas;she's also has a really hard to shift cough/chest infection going on for the last two months to the point the GP sent her for chest X-rays so her immune system isn't at its strongest at the moment either.She had her first jab at the end of November so isn't double jabbed yet.

She's absolutely determined to go and say she's 16 and it's her choice.I know she'd be devastated to miss it but to me her health comes first.

OP posts:
Tessellation · 12/12/2021 21:15

But will they all have spent that day at school together? If so then quite honestly I'd be inclined to let them have their sleepover but minimise contact after that.

PickElaine · 12/12/2021 21:16

They are already crammed in together in classrooms, canteens, changing rooms, buses and corridors. I work in a school and there is no social distancing. There is no soap!

MagicMatilda · 12/12/2021 21:17

I would allow it. She will have already been in very close contact with the others at school plus wouldn’t want my child to miss out.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 12/12/2021 21:18

Her age group have had such a shit time through all this …. Let her go

Aimee1987 · 12/12/2021 21:18

I agree with the other posters if they spend the day together in close contact I cant see the sleep over being an issue.
The o ly way to stop her getting covid would be to self isolate between now and Christmas bit that seems a bit extreme to me

Japingjaponica · 12/12/2021 21:19

They are in such close contact at school, it makes absolutely no difference.

Comedycook · 12/12/2021 21:20

I'd totally let her go especially after the cheese and wine meeting/party at downing Street

Stopsnowing · 12/12/2021 21:21

I had planned to try to isolate in the run up to Xmas but the dd had a sleepover and dm wants to take them to a show and at the end of the day these things are important.

Serenschintte · 12/12/2021 21:21

You never get to be 16 again. Mental health is as important as physical health. Let her go. Out kids need to live as normal like as possible. They are at school together anyway

monkeysox · 12/12/2021 21:22

They're together all day in school there's no difference

FindingMeno · 12/12/2021 21:22

Yes, let her go.
All work and no play isn't fair, and they're all together at school.

CherieBabySpliffUp · 12/12/2021 21:23

But she hasn't been in close contact with the hosting girl's family so I don't know that that reasoning is valid.

Mooloolabababy · 12/12/2021 21:23

I'd let her go, maybe suggest to the parents that all of them do a lateral flow before they go to be on the safe(er) side. They spend all this time at school together so can't see what difference it makes really.

firsttimeclock · 12/12/2021 21:24

I'd let her go. At a push maybe ask the six of them to LFT first?

askingforafriend80 · 12/12/2021 21:24

Let her go

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 12/12/2021 21:25

@BigSandyBalls2015

Her age group have had such a shit time through all this …. Let her go
This.
myusernamewastakenbyme · 12/12/2021 21:25

Id let her go too...life is too short.

Innocenta · 12/12/2021 21:26

Broadly I agree with everyone saying to let her go, but I think one thing to consider is how bad IS her chest? If it's more at the worry level, then you should likely let her go. Or is there an ongoing clinical concern?

TenoringBehind · 12/12/2021 21:27

Let her go and have some fun.

Rupertpenrysmistress · 12/12/2021 21:27

I would let mine go, they have missed so much already.

NinetyNineRedBalloonsGoBy · 12/12/2021 21:27

@Serenschintte

You never get to be 16 again. Mental health is as important as physical health. Let her go. Out kids need to live as normal like as possible. They are at school together anyway
This!

Let her go OP, these poor kids have lost enough of their teen years.

gogohm · 12/12/2021 21:27

I would let her go unless you have vulnerable family relying on you. We've got the kids coming come Tuesday (university) so are presuming someone will have picked it up, so I have emergency Christmas dinner in the freezer, if we are all clear for Christmas even better.

Ikeameatballs · 12/12/2021 21:30

Let her go.

I don’t think I’ll go on my planned night out on Dec 18th but I wouldn’t stop DD15 going to her friend’s party on the same night. Me, DP and all four of her grandparents will be tripled jabbed by then and I really don’t want to limit her life due to Covid any more.

JustDanceAddict · 12/12/2021 21:33

I’d totally allow it. Am not stopping my teen doing anything social he wants to do.

BungleandGeorge · 12/12/2021 21:45

We’ve had one of those letters before. Don’t allow your kids to see their friends indoors despite them being in school all day together and despite adults socialising freely. I’ll be ignoring from now and sticking to the actual guidelines. Poor kids