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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think health professionals shouldn't shame people

526 replies

EmmaGrundyForPM · 11/12/2021 14:45

My son did not get a Covid jab. His rationale was that his risk of serious illness was very low even if he contracted it, and that all those who are at high risk have now been jabbed. I don't agree with that argument, and have had all 3 jabs myself, but respect that that is his view. He also suffers from anxiety and panic attacks.

He finally decided to have the vaccine, as he realises that various restrictions might impact on him (Covid passports etc) if he remains unvaccinated. So he went off yo the walk-in centre to get one this morning.

He's just got home fuming. When he presented himself, the person registering him asked him why he hadn't had his jab earlier. Why would that be any of their business? He then went through to the vaccinator who asked the same thing. He did explain that he had changed his mind because he wants to go to concerts and to visit his grandparents abroad. The vaccinator then said "that's a very selfish attitude, you won't have a vaccine to prevent people dying but you will to go on holiday".

Surely Health Professionals ought to be encouraging people to get vaccinated, not shaming them? I've given him grief about not getting vaccinated but I'm his Mum and he lives with us. I volunteer in a vaccine clinic and have always made a point of being really positive towards everyone who comes for their vaccine. AIBU?

OP posts:
Buttermaflooby · 11/12/2021 19:10

This is precisely why my sister still won't get her first jab even though she's coming round to the idea. She doesn't want to be judged for not going before now. So idiotically counter productive

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 11/12/2021 19:11

@Tivermeshimbers1

Why are anxiety and panic attacks always mentioned on here? He’s not too anxious when flying off on holiday or attending concerts Hmm

He was being selfish. In fact here’s the definition of selfish...

“(of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for other people; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.”

He’s annoyed someone pointed out the obvious.

This.
Snowmanuel · 11/12/2021 19:14

Meh, should they have said that? Probably not. Do I agree with them? Yep.

AD3000 · 11/12/2021 19:15

It's their job to administer vaccines not pass judgment on whether, when or why people choose to have them. YANBU.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 11/12/2021 19:15

@LostinNovember. I'm so sorry Flowers

OP posts:
kowari · 11/12/2021 19:19

@bg92

This whole thread is hilarious. Do some of you realise you sound just like you're repeating what you hear on the news?

Whatever happened to freedom of choice. It isn't compulsory?!

Agreed. If you get a letter or a text it's an offer. You can choose to book straight away, to wait, or to decline the offer.

Not everyone who is eligible for a free flu vaccine gets it. Those who weren't eligible for a free one were offered a voucher at work and few people wanted it. There was no judgement.

ManicPixie · 11/12/2021 19:19

Gonna just put it out there: I don’t think they said that and I think your son is lying.

kowari · 11/12/2021 19:25

@ManicPixie

Gonna just put it out there: I don’t think they said that and I think your son is lying.
You think he came home putting on an act and pretending to be angry and lied to his double jabbed parents about what was said? For what purpose?
MarbleQueen · 11/12/2021 19:26

Stop referring to these people as health care professionals.

The op clearly stated it was the receptionist that was rude and also the vaccinater. Many vaccinaters are members of the public with 12 weeks training and no medical experience whatsoever.

Not many people would put up with some random receptionist making shitty comments. Totally out of order.

ManicPixie · 11/12/2021 19:28

“ You think he came home putting on an act and pretending to be angry and lied to his double jabbed parents about what was said? For what purpose?”

To prove his weird aversion to the system right somehow. It’s absurd of course, but so was his initial anti-vaccine stance. I just find it totally unbelievable two separate professionals would say that in a row.

SpindlesAdventWhirl · 11/12/2021 19:31

Have people really never experienced anyone lying?

XenoBitch · 11/12/2021 19:31

@ManicPixie

“ You think he came home putting on an act and pretending to be angry and lied to his double jabbed parents about what was said? For what purpose?”

To prove his weird aversion to the system right somehow. It’s absurd of course, but so was his initial anti-vaccine stance. I just find it totally unbelievable two separate professionals would say that in a row.

Some people that work in health care are utter knobs. I have worked with plenty, and also encountered them as a patient. Please don't pretend that they are all angels, because they are not. I believe OP, vlike I believe the other people who have also have similar experience to OP's son. Why would you want to shut a conversation about this down? What would be your motive for that?
kowari · 11/12/2021 19:32

To prove his weird aversion to the system right somehow
The OP didn't mention any 'weird aversion', just that he didn't want it as he was low risk, and that he also had anxiety.

ManicPixie · 11/12/2021 19:32

@SpindlesAdventWhirl

Have people really never experienced anyone lying?
When it’s two outrageous statements in a row that conveniently confirm an existing paranoia then yeah, I’ll call it suspect at best.
ManicPixie · 11/12/2021 19:35

@kowari

To prove his weird aversion to the system right somehow The OP didn't mention any 'weird aversion', just that he didn't want it as he was low risk, and that he also had anxiety.
Most anti-vaxx sentiments are based on anxiety.
kowari · 11/12/2021 19:37

Most anti-vaxx sentiments are based on anxiety.
So why would you refer to mental illness as a 'weird aversion'? That's a nasty thing to say.

tinkywinkyshandbag · 11/12/2021 19:39

My DD aged 17 hasn't been vaccinated either, her choice, she has thought about it and decided not to. I support her in making this choice. I'd also support her if she chose to have it. And if she does choose to have it I will be very unimpressed if she gets slagged off at the vaccination centre.

Westerman · 11/12/2021 19:42

I don't think the HCPs should have brought the subject up in public like that but, in the end, they are absolutely right. Maybe your son should just put it down to experience and take it as a lesson in selflessness.

HobgoblinGold · 11/12/2021 19:43

Totally unacceptable for HCP to say this but sadly compassion fatigue is a real issue in HCPs.

Wimblingwombling · 11/12/2021 19:43

No matter their personal opinion they should have said nothing. The main thing is he is now getting the vaccine

MooseBreath · 11/12/2021 19:50

They shouldn't have said anything to him. That said, they're completely right that he is selfish.

BurntO · 11/12/2021 19:58

We’re in a global pandemic with millions of deaths… healthcare workers are human too and the fact he’s admitted he’s only there cause he wants to holiday, I’m not surprised they struggled to keep their mouth shut

Derbee · 11/12/2021 20:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

MaxNormal · 11/12/2021 20:03

The poor bugger has now actually had the vaccine and it's still not enough apparently.

Well done the lot of you for putting off any vaccine hesitant people who were considering doing it.

NameChangeCity123 · 11/12/2021 20:04

Don't agree with your son but also don't agree with shaming him-
At the end of the day, he is there doing it now- better late than never. Plenty of times
At work I have disagreed but never said so, there's no room for personal views and opinions in the workplace

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