To think a clearer message should of been given

[TEH82]

So DS is 10 and in year 6 at junior school, I also have a DS in year 5 at the same school who has ASD.
Thursday night DS10 went to the local park with friends and another boy produced a knife which was a proper sized kitchen knife and said he was going to stab DS friend. DS and fried made excuses about needing the toilet and ran home and told me. A few minutes later another mum messaged me as had seen the knife but the boy ran off with it so I rang the police and the head teacher as I have her mobile due to son with ASD.
The police come round and we’re at school yesterday giving talks on knifes and dangers and them and head spoke to kids.
However son is really upset this kid was still in school yesterday but want allowed out at lunch and break.
My second son was a mess hearing this happened and wanted to look at ways to stop bleeding if you were stabbed- literal child due to additional needs.
Am I harsh in thinking this kid should of least not been in school yesterday or even the rest of the term due to the upset and fear caused which hasn’t given a great message about punishment to other kids.

The school can't punish for something that happened out of school though. You did the right thing telling them and they have responded accordingly by having the police come in and do a talk. I definitely get why you're worried and concerned for your son.

Missing the point here but are you in the uk op? What are 10 year olds doing hanging out in tbt park at night time ? Were any adults there ?

You seem determined to miss the point.

Let me see, young boy in the press last week. Abuse happening to him did not occur in school either.

Does that ring a bell?

Schools are part of a wider safeguarding net. Whatever you may believe the safeguarding officer in a school will know a lot about some kids, even things that don't happen at school. They have to, to keep that child and others safe. And that has been the case for decades!

@LuluBlakey1

Why are 10 year old children out at night in the park in December?

Really??

Should we lock children in their rooms as soon as they come home from school in the winter? It's dark by 4pm. Kids still need exercise, fresh air and socialisation outwith school.

Getting darked on won't harm them.

@Nevertime

I'm not sure it's the school's issue? The police were called and (presumably) made no arrest. It didn't happen at school, why is it up to the school to do what the police didn't?

Thank god these “It’s not our problem” attitudes are left in the past. That’s not how safeguarding works

Thank god these “It’s not our problem” attitudes are left in the past. That’s not how safeguarding works

The school have done what they can. No doubt they have made appropriate Social Care referrals and they have arranged for the knife crime talk. What I meant is, there's not more the school can do.

The boy went straight to the park from school it was around 3.45 so hadn’t been home so had the knife in him all day. The boy admit to having the knife and making the threat to the other child

I can’t believe people thinking some little shit with a knife threatening to kill people isn’t a big deal!!?!

@catfunk

Missing the point here but are you in the uk op? What are 10 year olds doing hanging out in tbt park at night time ? Were any adults there ?

Yes, the OP clearly states another mum saw the knife.

For a child that age to be carrying a knife, there's something massively going on at home and school could be being used to safeguard the child.

I agree. Of course the OP was right to tell the school. There are some situations that don't happen at school, but where they need to know because the implications of this can continue into school, and this is one of them.

All the kids go through the park to go home that were present and my son has to be in by 4.30. My child is extremely sensible hence why his first reaction was to come home and let me know and get somewhere safe.
I phoned the head as the police were involved and as someone who works in safeguarding she needed to have a heads up due to the emotional impact on the others involved and the police interviewed all children at home that same night and were in school at drop at 8.30am and there again for collection at 3.10

You said your ten year old had been in the park on ‘Thursday night’ — are you now saying that it wasn’t night time at all but immediately after school?

Yanbu. At age ten he has full legal criminal responsibility and could (and in my view should) have been arrested for assault.

Can you move schools??? This is serious stuff!

Also it seems to me that the school and police have completely missed the point. They’re talking about educating children on “the dangers of knives” but the bully already knows that knives are dangerous, that’s why he’s waving one around, for the thrill of power and danger.

I maybe wordy it wrong saying night but was after school so late afternoon

I too thought you meant night. Not afternoon or evening.

Something is very wrong with the system.

If I were threatened with a knife by a colleague, out of work, I don't think I'd be expected to work with them the next day. Yet there's no such protection for children.

As a teacher I would ensure the child was in school due to safeguarding

Also you could use the opportunity to teach the kids appropriate bits of first aid. At least running for help, ringing 999 but other first aid bits too? The school might be encourage to get someone in to do a session in school, like St. John’s or similar.
IMO you are never too young to learn how to help. It might be a positive to come out of it all.

@Medievalist

Of course op was right to ring the school!!! Do you seriously think a HT wouldn't want to know if one of their pupils had, the day before, been carrying a kitchen knife and threatening to stab someone - even if it was off the school premises?!!!!!!!!

In the op's shoes I'd be asking the HT what they were going to do to ensure my dc's safety and deal with their anxiety. I'd also be contacting the chair of governors.

This.

@FriedasCarLoad

Something is very wrong with the system.

If I were threatened with a knife by a colleague, out of work, I don't think I'd be expected to work with them the next day. Yet there's no such protection for children.

How would you avoid it? If the company didn't have grounds to sack or suspend them you'd have to either leave or go sick.

Well you don't know what's going on at home, he might be safer at school than at home and he is being punished as not allowed out to play.

@Nevertime So if the child is allowed to mix freely in school and he pulled out the knife and stabbed your child, you would be perfectly fine with that then? You wouldn't say Why the fuck was he allowed in school after threatening a classmate with a knife?

@FriedasCarLoad

Something is very wrong with the system.

If I were threatened with a knife by a colleague, out of work, I don't think I'd be expected to work with them the next day. Yet there's no such protection for children.

It is not possible to compare a primary school aged child with an adult or even a teen. An adult is fully developed. Perhaps at this has been interpreted by the school (who know more than op) as a red flag and safeguarding issue around his home life rather than a desire to hurt someone. Perhaps the boy is already on their radar and this may be why the boy is not being sanctioned more. Perhaps he showed significant remorse. We don’t have the answer.

[quote nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut]@Nevertime So if the child is allowed to mix freely in school and he pulled out the knife and stabbed your child, you would be perfectly fine with that then? You wouldn't say Why the fuck was he allowed in school after threatening a classmate with a knife?[/quote]
Yes I'd be completely fine with any child getting stabbed in school

Dont be ridiculous. I'm not OK with vulnerable children being excluded because other parents think they should be with no knowledge of the safeguarding, risk assessment and learning that the school has put in place.