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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parent from the school opposite parking on my drive

387 replies

LemonJelly76 · 10/12/2021 00:34

I'm not letting on my actual opinion on this, but I am curious to know what others think.

I live opposite a primary school. I knew the school was there when I bought the house. Most days my car is not on my drive because I am at work, but I have on a couple of occasions come home to find a car there.
I haven't approached the parent on these occasions and have just parked elsewhere until they leave

This parent regularly uses the drive (must assume I'm not in) for 10-15 mins each morning and afternoon. There is usually other parking available, but further away

Driveway is a shared drive for 4 cars, I own one of the spaces and there is a Private Parking sign up across all four spaces which was there before I moved in.

YABU - it's fine because you're not using it most of the time
YANBU - they're CFs

OP posts:
Mothership4two · 10/12/2021 03:12

@LemonJelly76

I used to childmind for a lady who lived opposite a school and they had 4 spaces outside the house 2 of which where hers (she only had one car) It was great because it meant I always had a dedicated parking space for pickups... -- Until one day a policewoman knocked on my window and said I had been reported by multiple parents for parking on a drive that wasn't mine... - So I would first ask them to stop parking there and then report to the police not the school

I'm surprised she did this as police have zero powers if someone parks on private property as it isn't a criminal offence - I know from experience. Same with the local council.

At my Ds's old primary school a few people with drives had arrangements with friends allowing them to park there. This woman is not your friend and is being very cheeky.

Personally, I would stick a note on her car reminding her that she is trespassing and that you have been unable to park in your own drive several times. I'd also contact the school. They probably won't be able to identify her, but may send out a general message to parents about this. If she carries on (doubtful unless she is incredibly rude) then you can only somehow block your drive which is going to be a pain for you coming in and out. And, of course, like others have said you could block her in and confront her when you next can't get in. You could put a photo of the car on your local Facebook and Next Door pages and on the school parents Facebook page if there is one.

cookiemonster2468 · 10/12/2021 03:31

I'm wanting to gather opinions as to whether it's unreasonable to ask this given its empty a lot of the time. Is it cheeky they do this or does it really matter if I'm not using it? I'm wanting to know what others think

Obviously it's not OK. You can't just use someone's property just because it's empty. Would you care if someone came and set up a deck chair or two in your garden because they saw you weren't out there?

What if they saw you'd left the house and figured they'd go have a nap in your bed because you're not using it?

Don't be daft, OP. They're taking advantage.

milkyaqua · 10/12/2021 03:42

Nope. It's your drive, for your use - not free parking for randoms who don't have the courtesy to ask if it would be okay.

PennyWus · 10/12/2021 03:45

They are being very rude. Tell the school, every single time it happens, report the number. You can also phone the LA and ask them to send a traffic warden sometimes.

People drive like idiots round schools and park even worse.

Mothership4two · 10/12/2021 03:56

I agree mainly, but traffic warden can do nothing. Hassling the school however might get them to mention it to parents or even put out their own patrol

Mothership4two · 10/12/2021 03:59

cookiemonster2468

Obviously it's not OK. You can't just use someone's property just because it's empty. Would you care if someone came and set up a deck chair or two in your garden because they saw you weren't out there?

Wasn't there a thread about this a while back where neighbours were climbing over the fence and using someone's garden and garden furniture while they were at work? I can't remember what happened

Aussiegirl123456 · 10/12/2021 04:00

Block them in next time instead of parking elsewhere 🥂

Mothership4two · 10/12/2021 04:01

@cookiemonster2468

What if they saw you'd left the house and figured they'd go have a nap in your bed because you're not using it?

Read up on Goldilocks and The Three Bears OP. It just about covers your situation! Smile

Mothership4two · 10/12/2021 04:06

From DAS Law, Aussiegirl:

If a car is parked on my driveway, can I block them in?

If someone has parked on your driveway and you were to block them in, your vehicle may be causing an obstruction to the public highway and this is a criminal offence. The owner of the vehicle could therefore call the police.

As Alana Morisette would say "isn't it ironic?"

LaurenKelsey · 10/12/2021 05:05

@Twolostsoulsswimminginafishbow

Id block them in then have a large gin.
This is a great plan. Wine 😂
Faevern · 10/12/2021 05:06

If its a shared drive for 4 cars is it next to your house, is there a garage and is she actually pulling up on to your drive in front of your house?

Not that it should matter but some shared driveways are set away from the house and I think some people treat them like a free for all.

You probably need a penguin bollard, if it's not her someone else might use it?

Hope478 · 10/12/2021 05:09

Get a bloody backbone.

DockOTheBay · 10/12/2021 05:11

@brushandmop

I have the same issue, everyone that does it, i take their rego plate and send it to the school. It's not the schools problem but they can talk to the council and get people out to ticket. Its also unsafe to have cars coming in and out of driveways when the school run is happening.
Why would the school have to deal with this, it is nothing to do with them. Also, if they got the council "out", they wouldn't give a ticket to a car parked legally on a private drive - they don't know it isn't the owners car.
tallduckandhandsome · 10/12/2021 05:37

The problem is they go from realising they’re being bad to feeling very entitled.

Address it now.

Coffeeonmytoffee · 10/12/2021 05:41

Someone kept doing this on my mums drive so we waited until a Friday and blocked her in. When she knocked on the door and pretended she has made a terrible mistake and had never done it before we explained the car belonged to my brother and he was away and wouldn’t be back for a few days.
We kept her blocked in for four days!
She didn’t do it again.
Either block her in or block your drive with something.
She can use it if she pays!
I’m such an angry menopausal woman I’d probably accidentally damage her tyres.

2reefsin30knots · 10/12/2021 05:47

Yep, I came home from work the other day and somebody had parked blocking my access to my drive, so I just blocked them in.

There are three houses up my drive and we are the last, so car owner had to knock on all the doors to find me and got disapproval from us all. Hopefully they won't park there again.

YourenutsmiLord · 10/12/2021 05:47

Can you tell her beforehand when not to be there as it is when you might need it.
Someone used to turn into our driveway - v long, not near the house, and it had no impact on me - when dropping her DC for school bus.
If it is really not affecting you I'd let it go. It's one less car blocking access to the school gates/ on the double yellow lines. But if it means you can't get in occasionally then I'd complain.

CeeceeBloomingdale · 10/12/2021 05:49

It would have been so easy for her to pop a note through the door and ask your permission or agree to rent it. It is not ok to help herself. I have a drive way that is double width and allows for another 1 or 2 cars also but my dad is the only person who ever parks there and only if he knows DH won't need a space. Friends visiting don't even park there unless explicitly told to do so. It is beyond cheeky.

SamhainToImbolc · 10/12/2021 05:53

If you left your door unlocked, would you mind if someone popped in to have a sleep in your bed whilst you weren't using it? No? Your property, your rules. Tell them to stop.

We had a CF neighbour who would direct visitors to park on our driveway instead of his. Not acceptable, and I told him so.

silentpool · 10/12/2021 06:05

My CF neighbours use my bin. I remove their rubbish and dump it on top of their bin and couldn't care less. If they ever mentioned it, I would ask them how they felt about me having a BBQ on their patio... Mi casa, su Casa ya know...

TheWayTheLightFalls · 10/12/2021 06:06

Next time it happens park them in and go for a leisurely breakfast.

silentpool · 10/12/2021 06:07

Posted too soon: Of course you should care. CF will take an inch and then if they get away with it, will take a mile too.

Sciurus83 · 10/12/2021 06:14

You know you don't HAVE to listen to your Dad?

MattHancocksSexTape · 10/12/2021 06:17

@spotsbeforetheeyes

YANBU.

I'd put a note on their windscreen saying, "Please stop parking here. This is private property. We have noted your license plate number and if you continue to use this space, we will take further action."

Then if it continues you can speak with the school & give them the car number.

What do you expect the school to do? Look at their mythical database of parents’ number plates?
bruffin · 10/12/2021 06:17

Why would the school have to deal with this, it is nothing to do with them
The schools and nursery my DC attended would put out letters about considerate parking on a regular basis

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