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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Parent from the school opposite parking on my drive

387 replies

LemonJelly76 · 10/12/2021 00:34

I'm not letting on my actual opinion on this, but I am curious to know what others think.

I live opposite a primary school. I knew the school was there when I bought the house. Most days my car is not on my drive because I am at work, but I have on a couple of occasions come home to find a car there.
I haven't approached the parent on these occasions and have just parked elsewhere until they leave

This parent regularly uses the drive (must assume I'm not in) for 10-15 mins each morning and afternoon. There is usually other parking available, but further away

Driveway is a shared drive for 4 cars, I own one of the spaces and there is a Private Parking sign up across all four spaces which was there before I moved in.

YABU - it's fine because you're not using it most of the time
YANBU - they're CFs

OP posts:
RooLou85 · 11/12/2021 20:44

My daughters school is on a residential street and my house is on the same street as a school, I would never block a driveway and very rarely see anyone else do it either, the few times they have and the owner has come home a quick toot on the horn usually does the job.
I have on desperate occasions pulled up in front of a row of garages and spent the next 5-10 minutes anxiously looking out for anyone who might want to use the garage in question.
Yes I think it’s super cheeky to use your driveway and if someone were to use mine I would give them the benefit of the doubt the first time with a friendly beep but if it happened again I would be p!ssed off. YANBU!

BirdyandBee · 11/12/2021 20:45

As someone who lives opposite our primary school I can attest to the CF-ery of people.

I knew when I moved to our house that it would be carnage around pick up/drop off. I’m very tolerant and people often block our drive. I’ll not lie, I will plan certain things around school drop off because I can’t be bothered with the hassle and quite frankly it’s dangerous! Maybe when my smalls have finished using the primary school I’ll not be so tolerant but for now, to me, it’s not that much of a big deal.

I have been blocked out my drive a couple of times, and I’m not afraid to say I blocked the road until they came back and were absolutely shocked at the fact that the whole of the road was very very angry at them. She never parked this end of the road again.

We get regular communications from the school about inconsiderate parking, and the rest of the street is angry that that the schools ‘drive-through’ has been closed and is making the whole situation worse (but that is another thread all together!)

Yes they are being a CF, yes it is your right to use your property whenever you want to, but for me, it’s easier to just work around it.

Headinthecloudsfeetinthemud · 11/12/2021 20:49

What a stupid post. Clearly you are using it - just not often.

Feeasco · 11/12/2021 20:52

You're being very kind and thinking beyond your own needs and wanting to be generous, but I think it is inconsiderate of this parent to think others (99% of other parents) should respect anothers property and she can raise herself above that social norm. People closer to London actually hire out their driveways! At the end of the day, your generosity is a reflection of your kindness but if it starts bring an issue, you need to address it and end it. My experience,sadly, is that it is selfish people that often take advantage without even being grateful ☹

StrandedStarfish · 11/12/2021 20:53

If you decide to rent the space to the CF then you should check your home insurance to see

  1. if there is cover for any claim CF may make
  2. your insurance isn’t invalided by you ‘running a business’ from your home. Even if any claim you made had nothing to do with the car space, they might declare your whole policy void.
  3. if there is no cover you would be wise to get some. This may cost more than you are charging CF
BreatheAndFocus · 11/12/2021 20:54

She’s definitely a cheeky f**r! When I moved house, my new neighbour’s friends did this ‘because I wasn’t using the drive’. It really pissed me off. I’d pop out to the supermarket, come back and find a random shit-heap of a car parked in my drive. Initially I hadn’t said anything because I was trying to be neighbourly, but they ended up utterly taking the piss because they saw me as soft and weak.

Leave a note on the car warning them that the area is private and if they park there again you’ll report them and have them clamped. They probably think you haven’t noticed.

NoIDontWantToDoIt · 11/12/2021 21:00

Cheeky buggers for sure. I used to live opposite a community centre and used to have issues with people parking across our driveway. Was not really noticed or an issue when we were both at work all day, but when I went on maternity leave it was. We would leave notes but it was often different people. We approached the centre but nothing changes. One day I came home from shopping. I had groceries and a sleeping child and I couldn't pull into my drive. I had to park down the street and I lost my mind. I marched down to the community centre, walked in, interrupted their bingo session and ranted and raved until someone got up to move their car. I am not proud of the language I used or the threats I made about what I would do to any future cars, but it was a long time before anyone from bingo parked there again.

Shade17 · 11/12/2021 21:08

Leave a note on the car warning them that the area is private and if they park there again you’ll report them and have them clamped. They probably think you haven’t noticed.

Who’s the OP going to report them to? They know they’re not going to get clamped!

Jack80 · 11/12/2021 21:11

They are cheeky and need telling.

daviesbrownsmithgreen · 11/12/2021 21:24

Block them in next time

WTAFhappened123 · 11/12/2021 21:33

The 2% that have stated YABU are fecking idiots! You must have ooodles of patience OP because I would be going nuclear on this if someone had the audacity to use my private drive!!

Emberino · 11/12/2021 23:34

You say the driveway is shared with other cars is it possible one of the other people using the drive has said she can use it but she is parking in the wrong space and doesn’t realise?

If that’s not the case then she is just being rude. But I understand even though it’s private property it’s not an offence of any kind.

Zipper666 · 11/12/2021 23:35

A polite note saying:

Due to a change in management, parking in this driveway will now incur a Twenty Pound charge. Please deposit your payment in the mailbox to ensure you are not towed.

nomoneytreehere · 12/12/2021 00:17

@tallduckandhandsome I was being facetious. Clearly I don't think I'm perfect.

No one has unfettered access to her property. Don't be over dramatic. If it inconveniences her say something rather than skulking round the corner worrying about it. Yes it's not something I would do but it's also not the crime of the century. Or indeed a crime at all.

Personally if I had to park somewhere else when I got home I would have waited for her and spoken to her there and then. But it's really not the biggest deal in the world and all I was saying was that I would struggle to get to worked up about it.

In any event given what the op has described she may have been given permission to park in one of the neighbouring drives and has made a mistake. I would be trying to get to the bottom of that before having a slanging match in the street with someone (which is a real possibility if the op follows some of the advice on here). Op doesn't know who this woman is at all.

fucketyfuckwit · 12/12/2021 00:29

I would let their tyres down and then turn up with your car and ask them to move.

sue20 · 12/12/2021 00:49

@JustJoinedRightNow

Can you park them in so that they need to come and find you to move your car, and then that’s when you can speak to her about parking there. She’s an absolute CF
Is it known it’s a woman? If not why assumed to be?
WhatTimeIsItMrGinola · 12/12/2021 01:00

Does your dad use all of the rooms in his house or his garden AT ALL TIMES? If not, would he be happy for Bob from next door/Sheila from down the road/Marjorie from the golf club to come and sit in his lounge to watch his TV/have a bath/used his spare room at any time that DDad isnt there?

Hope so, also hope he distributes his spare house keys to all and sundry if he is so "chilled" at how people are ok to use your things!!

Murdoch1949 · 12/12/2021 01:49

Next time it happens, park your car so they cannot manoeuvre out, this will give you time to come out of your house and speak to them.

FrenchBulldogsareFab · 12/12/2021 01:51

Print an A4 size sign 'PRIVATE PROPERTY' and attach to driver side windowscreen. I find a Pritt Stick is the ideal product to ensure notice does not blow away.

applesapplesapples · 12/12/2021 07:44

@brushandmop

I have the same issue, everyone that does it, i take their rego plate and send it to the school. It's not the schools problem but they can talk to the council and get people out to ticket. Its also unsafe to have cars coming in and out of driveways when the school run is happening.
Yeah because schools don’t have enough on their plates without people expecting them to sort their parking problems out. Maybe you can ask them to find out who doesn’t pick up their dog mess too.
OldGeezer · 12/12/2021 07:57

Stick this on its windscreen;
“This vehicle is parked on Private Property.
Vehicles parked here WILL BE CLAMPED.
The charge for release is at the discretion of the property owner.”
Cheap clamps available on eBay if you want to follow through.

supersop60 · 12/12/2021 08:04

OP has long gone, and I'm still wondering about her dad's boundaries. OP was obviously bothered by the parking enough to ask him, and he ignored her feelings, saying it was OK for other people to take advantage of her property. He's 'chilled out' , so presumably he lets other people walk all over him, too.

BoshHampster · 12/12/2021 09:09

It is tricky. We live on a quiet road opposite a church that has an infants school attached. Every day the road is blocked by Range Rovers and other oversized cars double parking and parking in the private bays of the residents. Worse, I think, for us is the parents who are not driving. They let their kids run riot. Our property is on the ground floor behind walls and banks of plants but the kids chase round around and around outside, using our property to hide behind and banging on the window when they see our dog, riling him up. The parents are oblivious. I do not blame the kids. They are just being kids. The parents should have better control. The school doesn't do anything and several property owners on the avenue have complained to them. People just seem to look out for themselves and forget what is fair.

As for the parking issue in the thread, I know people who have put collapsible bollards on their drive to stop people parking in private parking spaces. If you have a polite word it can only really go one of two ways. Hope it works out for you.

190190tnt · 12/12/2021 09:53

My Dad has a similar problem and we are looking into this:
bollardsecurity.co.uk/product/d4-telescopic-bollard/

There are much cheaper ones, you screw them into the ground and they lay flat when required

Shade17 · 12/12/2021 10:15

Stick this on its windscreen;
“This vehicle is parked on Private Property.
Vehicles parked here WILL BE CLAMPED.
The charge for release is at the discretion of the property owner.”
Cheap clamps available on eBay if you want to follow through.

Clamping a car on private land is a criminal offence. Epically stupid advice.