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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parent from the school opposite parking on my drive

387 replies

LemonJelly76 · 10/12/2021 00:34

I'm not letting on my actual opinion on this, but I am curious to know what others think.

I live opposite a primary school. I knew the school was there when I bought the house. Most days my car is not on my drive because I am at work, but I have on a couple of occasions come home to find a car there.
I haven't approached the parent on these occasions and have just parked elsewhere until they leave

This parent regularly uses the drive (must assume I'm not in) for 10-15 mins each morning and afternoon. There is usually other parking available, but further away

Driveway is a shared drive for 4 cars, I own one of the spaces and there is a Private Parking sign up across all four spaces which was there before I moved in.

YABU - it's fine because you're not using it most of the time
YANBU - they're CFs

OP posts:
Owl55 · 11/12/2021 18:05

Clamp it

ShabbyRobedNun · 11/12/2021 18:05

YANBU parking on a drive or blocking one is totally unreasonable, people at my childs school park infront of other peoples houses which would pee me off if it were my house, but to actually block or park on their drives would totally overstep the mark in my opinion.

Alleycat1 · 11/12/2021 18:22

I haven't read all the comments but my first thought, as always with these threads, is your liability should any kind of accident occur in your drive. Would your insurance cover this should you be sued? Trespassers can and do claim damages.

Vinomummyinlockdown · 11/12/2021 18:25

Wish I had a fool like you on my school run!!!!!!!!

AnnieSnap · 11/12/2021 18:28

I’d purchase a couple of bollards or have a chain fitted that can be pulled across your drive and padlocked. Even if you get her to stop parking on your driveway, someone else may start doing it!

Livelovebehappy · 11/12/2021 18:30

Say something to them, and if they continue to do it, just block them in with your car. They clearly think you don’t mind as you haven’t said anything.

Overthinkingx3 · 11/12/2021 18:46

So - mumsnet is full of folk who never ever pull up in a private space with empty spaces for 2 mins to load / unload . Or a restricted zone, or parking in a permit zone after hours! Never done the worse crime of putting the engine on in a residential zone whilst they wait for pick ups - because they are freezing in the car ?
Reality shows different !

The OP has asked for views after being slightly inconvenienced twice in a year … that’s all
Her own dad thinks she shouldn’t sweat it - it’s not a big deal… twice a year

Maybe the mumsnet folks are the only ones to have high horses to jump on - when nobody can prove that truth is alternative !

OP has asked for views … amd those who feel confident there is value in fighting this have answered , even if it is not really true

I personally think bollards amd police are mental options . Where I live - there is only paid for parking in the area. A busy area and kids can’t be expected to walk themselves across busy roads . No lollipop guides for 3 yrs now. So folk have to park 2-3 blocks away , to get a space unless they can come ages early , pay for 30mins minimum, so they can walk the kid to the school, and walk back to car, often with toddlers and buggies. The only people getting spaces near the school are grannies - who don’t pay, they sit in the car reading and watching for the warden. Life is shit and unfair !

Nobody at my school can afford to pay £1 in the morning and £1 in the afternoon every single day of term.

So the council - who don’t seem able to provide a lollipop person or parking facilities can only respond to the one mad nutter in the area who comes out every day, puts on a high viz and puts bollards out and calls the police out for the daily incidents of parking law infringements … even though she clearly isn’t affected personally

Does she feel better for it ? She needs to do it - so maybe
Life is crap for many and op doesn’t have to feel this is acceptable but she needn’t think the responses here are representative either

Poppingmad123 · 11/12/2021 18:46

Definitely block them in so when they do return, they then have to knock on your door and ask you to allow them out. No need for you to approach them.

Perfect opportunity for you to then ask & tell them:

  • why have you parked in my driveway?
  • don’t you realise it’s private property? It reads private on the driveway.
  • I’ve not been able to use my drive & had to park elsewhere when you’re on my drive.
  • stop parking here or will report your registration number to both the school and council.

That should both embarrass and stop them and if they have any sense, stop doing it on someone else’s property too.

JudgeJ · 11/12/2021 18:46

@goingback

had this with a previous property near a football stadium, shifts meant finishing after the game had started and usually found 1 car on the drive, could hold 2 cars. Before we got bollard and after many arguments with football fans I blocked one car in with my car and went out for the night. next morning he was banging the door telling me off that he was unable to go to his work and wanted me to pay his lost wages, shame i still couldnt move my car as i had been drinking very late.
I knew someone who had this problem, the car was parked almost in his front window and luckily this allowed the owner to park behind him, close and lock the gate, he then went off for the weekend. One return all kinds of threats were made about suing for wrongful imprisonment etc etc,, Nothing came of it thoguh.
Whatsr · 11/12/2021 18:48

They wouldn't do it again if it was my drive.

It would cost them a fortune in tyres

Usernamerequired · 11/12/2021 19:03

They pay road tax (hopefully) so they can park on the road like normal people not your private driveway. Totally taking the piss by doing this. I would ask school to send a message to parents in their newsletter or whatever to specifically ask people not to park on or obstructing driveways

Plumbuddle · 11/12/2021 19:15

Not RTFT, just OP's posts. I just want to counter what your dad is saying OP. There IS prejudice in someone else parking in your space. First of all, perhaps not in your area but there can be parking costs to parking off it, why should you pay that not CF/ Secondly, again it may seem academic, but you are the one that has to upkeep the tarmac and if there is a lot of usage, there will ultimately be a lot of wear -- which you will pay to remedy. Thirdly, bear in mind that every time that person gets into that car and drives off, signals to passing burglars (who think she is the resident) that the house is now empty and it could be a risk factor there. And finally, what if you need emergency services to come to your house and put out fires etc? They won't gain the sort of good access that no doubt you paid for by purchasing a house with a forecourt or drive. CF's car will be a block in all sorts of ways.

I would definitely put some sort of signage up as if one parent thinks it's a good wheeze and you don't mind, then other parents will be sure to spot that and will copy.

hallygore · 11/12/2021 19:22

If your camera shows the person getting in and out of the car or can be moved to, I would get the footage and show the school. Every school I've ever had dealings with would be happy to identity and the parent and speak to them because they dont want to alienate the local community.

Shade17 · 11/12/2021 19:24

Clamp it

Not advice you should be giving

vixeyann · 11/12/2021 19:26

How is this even a question..or course they are wrong! I would be having some strong words and, if it continued, getting my self some lockable bollards. The sheer brass neck of people is amazing.

Tara336 · 11/12/2021 19:33

I had someone park in my allocated space, I had literally nowhere to park, I found out which flat they were visiting and politely asked them to move. For some unknown reason the CF was possessed with ME for asking them to move! I then found a nasty note on my windscreen when I next went out telling me how unreasonable I was!

Tigger1895 · 11/12/2021 19:48

I wouldn’t be happy for a number of reasons. Mainly because theres a possible liability issue. If the driveway had a pothole and someone broke their foot you are open to a claim. Not saying they’d win as they are on private property but people have brought cases and won. Also it’s completely ignorant to just assume you aren’t going to return. If it happens again leave a note on the windscreen telling them to stop. Also contact the school, they’ll send out a letter to all parents telling them they have had complaints.

IsobelElsie123 · 11/12/2021 20:02

It’s outrageous - but you aren’t objecting this why should she stop? Friday 10th is the last time she can do this. Block her in with your car so she will have to knock on your door and you can give her the news going forward. Also ask the school to put a note in pupils bags saying that complaints have been received.

purplebunny2012 · 11/12/2021 20:19

@IsobelElsie123

It’s outrageous - but you aren’t objecting this why should she stop? Friday 10th is the last time she can do this. Block her in with your car so she will have to knock on your door and you can give her the news going forward. Also ask the school to put a note in pupils bags saying that complaints have been received.
Can you explain Friday 10th?
StrandedStarfish · 11/12/2021 20:25

If they have an accident on your drive you may be held liable. They wouldn’t be classed as a trespasser as they have your tacit approval to park there.

sarahwoodward · 11/12/2021 20:28

I understand why you feel unable to say anything as so eti es people can be intimidating. Ring the school they should be able to message parents and help police polite behaviour for residents.

Santahatesbraisedcabbage · 11/12/2021 20:29

Where is Olaf in his highviz when you need him??

skodadoda · 11/12/2021 20:31

@BlackeyedSusan

Can you print pictures of the culprit and car and post it them on a large sign on your space. (Old cereal boxes and a Sharpie) embarrass the CF in front of her fellow parents.

Have you got any neighbours who would be up for putting a sign under her back wind screen wiper so it can be read from the street?

Yes, do this before she arrives and stand it on your drive with a note, ‘Go away cf!’ (Or similar words 🤣)
Iwouldgoouttonight73 · 11/12/2021 20:38

Local residents that were fed up with the parking at my dd’s primary school contacted the head & she sent the parents a letter asking drivers to be mindful of blocking drives. Totally within your rights to do the same. I’d put a bollard on your space when you go out. I don’t drive btw…

EbonanzaScrooge · 11/12/2021 20:41

Your dads right, there’s not much harm being done but that’s just downright rude. I can almost guarantee if the roles were reversed this driver would have already spoke to you about it.

Leave a note warning them if they use the drive again they will be either reported or blocked in.