To think school didn’t handle this right?

[Adylans]

DS is 8, in year 4 and autistic. Doing generally well at school now after a really difficult first few years. Has an EHCP in place.
This morning he was refusing to go into school. He has a new preventer inhaler and he hates it basically and it causes a lot of issues and that is what triggered the whole thing this morning. Last night he had an hour + long meltdown over it and this morning was similar when he had to have it.
I really don’t think his school handled the situation properly at all and I just feel, I don’t know upset/worried about the way they were acting towards him.
The first thing that concerned me was that they were stood there saying to each other “he’s smiling” “yeah I know he is” insinuating that they think he’s just doing it on purpose for attention or whatever. He wasn’t he just smiles inappropriately sometimes, so do I. it’s not exactly unheard of. And he was probably feeling awkward because they were grabbing him. They kept telling him “mums not going to take you home” if I’m honest if they hadn’t said that I would have suggested I take him home to cool off then bring him in after half an hour or so.
Second was that two teachers grabbed him and tried to drag him into school and I said I didn’t want them to and they were clearly annoyed by this.
It had been about 2 minutes of him not going in, he usually goes in just fine (finally after a lot of issues ) and I just don’t think he really deserves to be physically dragged into school. I’ve watched them do it once before and it was horrible, he’s 8 and quite strong so it takes a lot of force and he just throws himself to the ground and then they try pulling him up and he grabs o to the fence etc and It’s all ends up really unpleasant/ quite extreme and not helpful and he wasn’t doing anything to warrant it- he wasn’t hurting anyone or doing anything dangerous. Then the headteacher came out and (again, clearly annoyed with me for not letting them drag him in) and said to “take him home then we don’t have enough staff” so I did.
The whole thing was only about 15 minutes it’s not like he was kicking off refusing for ages he wasn’t. He wasn’t even kicking off because he was completely shut down and not speaking at all.
I feel like they all just think I’m awkward and let him get away with everything now but I’m not and I don’t, I just don’t want my autistic kid dragged into school and through a classroom full of his peers for no real reason whatsoever. W being going in fine for almost a year with no issue. Honestly if they didn’t try to grab him and just gave him a bit of time he’d have been fine.
I’m going to try and see if the dr can prescribe something different for his asthma as he just isn’t getting used to it at all but there will always be something, he isn’t going to be perfectly fine 100% of the time and I hate the idea of him being treated like a nuisance for something he can’t help.

We have school refusers who sometimes take an hour with two members of staff to get inside, but I suspect that due to Covid, all staff are needed as there are NO supply and loads of people out everywhere. I doubt they were truly annoyed by him, they just needed to be quicker. And they aren't allowed to drag him, as they should have safe handling training.

Ask to see their restraint policy. It can only be used in specific circumstances and from your description that was not one of them.

I understood that Team teach should only be used if all verbal and non verbal reasoning has been exhausted and the pupil is in danger or is a danger to others or property
It's not as black and white as that on the exhausting all verbal and non verbal reasoning, at least not anywhere I've worked. It has to be necessary, proportionate and reasonable for the situation.
I've been in situations where Team Teach holds were needed because the situation required positive handling in order to keep children safe. We didn't go through every type of reasoning. The staff involved assessed that it was reasonable and proportionate to use a Team Teach hold to escort a child from a situation to prevent injury to themselves and others.

@MOmiMa

Why did you bring him to the gates, then, if you weren't prepared to leave him at school? What are poor teachers to do if you bring him to school? I am pretty sure, if teachers did not try to encourage (drag?- I just can not believe it if you are in the UK) him to school, you would be on here, complaining, that teachers were refusing to take your son into school. Of course, it is always easier to blame someone else, but yourself.

Because OP can't keep him home every time something triggers meltdown/shutdown. I bet the school would have something to say if she did. There's nowhere where she says she wanted him at home. That's where he ended up because she refused to let them drag him in and the head told her to take him home. I wonder how that was recorded on the register.

The teachers should manage his needs, communicate with the parent, find out what's going on,why, how can they help,what works what the parent/ child want/need to happen.

I've seen heads and even SENCO's in the UK drag or carry (one under arms one by the legs) children in. I don't work there anymore,thank fuck.

You said his echp states he can have an adult supervise when he leaves classroom - does he have decidated 1 to 1 hours for adult support assistant?

Yes , I understand that @LolaSmiles (and thank you) but without wanting to derail the thread , had something happened to the OPs son , how would they justify using it ?

@noblegiraffe

Physically dragging a child into school? What??

Is there a plan for this? Risk assessment and training? Or they just decided to grab him?

A teacher did this to my suspected asd dd in year one.

I still remember a ex friend of mine who worked with vulnerable children saying this was ok.

I’d love to read the school’s side of this incident. I can guarantee it’s polar opposite. I’ve seen many ineffective parents making situations incredibly difficult and much, much worse than they needed to be.

On side note the steroid inhalers are vile pls they have to rinse mouth after or brush teeth which can cause a meltdown by itself.

Seashor- I can make a good guess at their side. They thought he was doing it on purpose and that I was pandering. They made it quite clear.
But he wasn’t and I wasn’t. He rarely has issue and he’s autistic not naughty but OK.
It
Might have been easier (for them) for me to have left and let them drag him into school. He may have even appeared “fine” once in school. But it wouldn’t have been right. I don’t think I’m an infective parent just because I didn’t want my 8 year old kid dragged into school. What do you propose I should have done? I’d love to know what you’d have apparently done so differently to me.

*ineffective

In no other situation would people try to defend the actions and question the mothers behaviour. If her child had no lower limbs and required a wheelchair but they were really busy and didn't have time would it be OK for them to just drag him in? If the child was blind but they didn't have time to find his cane would it be OK to drag him in? You are legally ONLY allowed to lay your hands on a child in order to move them if they are a danger to themselves or others. This child was not a danger to himself or others so they were not allowed to act like this, that the end of it. Just because the additional need isn't visible doesn't mean you can ignore it. As for staff are stretched I couldn't care less, schools get funding for taking children with additional needs, don't want them, state you can't meet their needs and they will be reallocated. Sen and mainstream teacher for over 20 years, absolutely no excuse.

Would it have been an option to go through another door?

I remember a parent with an autistic child who struggled with attending school (I appreciate it doesn't happen often for your child) & they found entering school away from other children helped. The went via main entrance/visitor entrance.

I think you need to agree a plan with the school for future occurrences. If you taking him home and bringing him in a bit later (or sitting with him in the playground until he's calm) is usually an option, that might be the best, so that they're not having to use up two members of staff on staying with him outside. Perhaps also set up some sort of signal so you can let them know on arrival if something has triggered him or you think he may be easily triggered.

As I understand it, physical force should be a last resort (eg to prevent injury to someone) and using recognised techniques that they have been trained in. That might be something to ask about.

If he has a handling plan then I think the parent has to see it/ok it/maybe even sign it? Question this and you can also refuse if you don't want him handled.
The school definitely didn't handle it well and I would question with the school senco the "He's smiling" - clearly don't understand his needs. You can ask to have it written in his EHCP that he smiles inappropriately and not to read into this.
Tbh the handling - sounds roughly like Team Teach. Feet leaving ground is normal. I have seen it used (rarely) as a way to move a child somewhere they were refusing to go even when no-one was in danger but child would have been left alone(therefore unsafe I suppose). What would happen if when you arrived at the gate, you just said goodbye and walked away?
My pupil has a transition object that comes in with him each day to bridge the gap between home and school.

(I'm a yr 4 teacher and have a child with autism and school refusal tendancies in my class)

Yes, we have a positive handling agreement signed by parents. We also have a book in which we record every time we need to use positive handling (even the quickest escort to a quiet space to remove them from danger). This documents the triggers to the incident, what happened, what teamteach escorts/ holds were used, how long for and what debrief was offered to the child afterwards. Staff involved all sign it and parents are made aware.

sounds like you have a lot on your plate. Un-mumsnetty hugs.

@2bazookas

The whole thing was only about 15 minutes

15 minutes when two members of staff needed to be indoors with a larger group of children, getting the school day routine off to a smooth start. A busy and very demanding time of day for them..

Couldn;t you suggest " "You two go in, leave him here with me and when he's ready I'll bring him in. "

Re read the post

About half way down

Then apologise to the op

I’m so sorry OP, but glad to see you’ve had lots of excellent advice on how to engage with school; & reassurance your instincts were correct.

As PPs have mentioned, steroid inhalers frequently taste truly heinous - & it’s important that as well as using a spacer (if applicable) you rinse your mouth afterwards, because they can cause oral thrush. I wonder if the Asthma UK Helpline would be able to offer any suggestions/advice. Does he have an Asthma Plan? In theory everyone with asthma should have one (not necessarily in Asthma UK’s format) but it isn’t always the case. Would he cope better if he did have one (& perhaps had a copy of his own to look after)? AUK do also do a calendar-thing you send away to them for that helps children track their symptoms (annoyingly there’s no proper description of it nor even a clear picture of it in their resources section).

Definitely worth ensuring he’s on the strength of inhaler that involves taking the fewest doses - so, for example, a 100mcg/dose inhaler they take one “puff” of twice a day; rather than 2 “puffs” of a 50mcg/dose inhaler twice a day.

I hope you can get everything sorted ok & that what happened doesn’t weigh on your DS because it sounds like he’s made awesome progress with his attendance. Hopefully the fact you didn’t let them just haul him off means that he’ll continue to feel safe.

Yes , I understand that @LolaSmiles (and thank you) but without wanting to derail the thread , had something happened to the OPs son , how would they justify using it ?
If the full details are here then they would struggle to justify it as it doesn't sound reasonable or proportionate.

On the other hand it might be entirely appropriate to guide a child into school which wouldn't be a TeamTeach hold and isn't grabbing/pushing. If a student begins to behave in a way that puts themselves or others in danger, eg hypothetically putting feet up, throwing body weight then the decision to take hold or use an escort to get them out the situation would need to be made based on assessing the situation in front of them. In this situation the staff would be able to justify their choices.

A lot depends on the exact situation in front of them and the completed logs.

From what the OP said the child put their feet up because they went to physically move him, so in reaction to it @LolaSmiles, in my mind, not justified
I've been trained in both teamteach & Scip and I'm struggling to get my head around this, the way the OP described it.
However, I appreciate we weren't there, but the OP must question the school so they are singing from the same hymn sheet. Something has clearly gone wrong
I hope you get it sorted OP

OP, I’d be complaining to SENCO, headteacher and governors. If they’re physically dragging him in front of you, God knows what they’d do if you weren’t there! It’s unacceptable.

I’m not sure how is best to bring this up- email? I’m terrible at writing emails but if I speak to them in person they’ll just dismiss it I’m sure.
I’ve complained to the headteacher before about a different issues and got the rudest most patronising reply back that just made me feel like I was being a total idiot.

@HangryHangryHippo

Hi, I’m sorry that you and your DS have experienced this. I’ve been a long time lurker on mn, but felt so cross reading your post that I had to sign up and reply to you. I’m the lead in a unit for children with autism within a mainstream primary. Nobody should be dragging your boy anywhere, ever. They are on very dodgy legal ground. He was not a danger to others, himself or property. Even if he was, best practice is to try de-escalation techniques first. Challenge the school- ask to see their positive handling policy and what positive handling training staff have received. If they continue to lay hands on him without a valid reason and proper training you will be reporting them for assault.

What does he hate about the new preventer?

This ^^

Arrange a meeting for future occurrences with descalatuin strategies and states you can take him home & return, that goes into his EHCP

I would also say those two teachers I see reacted and I think they misunderstood autism , the nervous smiling at inappropriate times and made it about them not the child.

Also- if is air dispense brown inhaler (not a powder one)- is it becotide/ beclometasone evohaler , get your GP to prescribe an aero chamber. (Google it to see) as he takes it through this and won't taste it nor will it coat his mouth (taste) , most asthmatics should take inhaler steroids (preventer) evohalers like this anyway. Get DS to rinse mouth afterwards. Am sorry to hear is upsetting him

Email it - arrange a meeting.
Maybe MN can help you compose email

And if HT patronises or dismisses you again in email reply , think through what HT has missed - then I would email reply reiterating my points of concern " and cc: school governors (look up their emails) . And I would consider emailing OFSTED for safeguarding with a line stating "Inappropriately physically dragged Autistic child" Lack of understanding or patience by 2 teachers and failure of school to engage and adequately risk assess and positive plan for incidences

As they can't do this, child not presenting risk to safety at the time and they escalated it through teachers impatience lacking understanding that to a shut down autistic child it is experienced as an assault