Shouting at me to put her down

[Sleeplikelog]

My 3.5 year old today.

Walking around the shops and she was grabbing things, going to the sweets etc, wouldn’t hold my hand, so I picked her up.
She proceeded to hit me and tell me go get off her and put her down. Ten people behind us in the queue watching.
Is this normal?!
How would you react to this, anyone been in a similar situation? is this just kids or what 🤷🏻‍♀️

Oh God yes, they develop octopus arms. I remember one of mine clearing a whole Christmas display in a shop once.

Before you go in the shop tell her your expectations and what will happen if she doesn't follow them. If you have time take her round to look at all the things she's interested in. Occupy her while you wait in the queue, talk to her about what you've bought and what you're going to do with it. Have a snack handy at all times if poss. Don't be surprised if despite all your planning and occupying she still has a complete meltdown.

Mine were too heavy for me to pick up like a rugby ball. I used to stand next to them very deliberately not looking at them, repeating "get up please" at regular intervals, while they lay on the floor and kicked. They never got whatever they were tantrumming about. The trick is to make it really boring for them. If they try to make a run for it, grab and hold firmly by the arm or hand (I used reins on one of mine, the other was a floor screamer rather than a runner-offer.) Repeat what you want them to do, calmly, do not engage in any other way until they desist. Then you can give them a lovely hug, praise them for doing the right thing, and carry on. Intensive, exhausting, but they learn within two or three weeks that tantrums don't work.
The holding under your arm thing may be counterproductive though, if it is making them too furious to calm down. Unless you are smartly removing them from the shop at the time.

It might not be unusual... but it is definitely not "normal" behaviour

@Juniper68

I taught ds2 to unwrap chewitts at that age. He could do it very slowly and I'd get a full shop done. Prior to that he screamed like mad in shops. Not the best parenting in the world but his screams were earth shattering so was worth it.

This is excellent. Might use it !

I used to have reins for mine.
If one of them misbehaved, I used to pick them up by the reins and carry them like a bag of shopping 😂

@Marvellousmadness ?

@Marvellousmadness

It might not be unusual... but it is definitely not "normal" behaviour

Something can’t be usual and abnormal you melt.

If it’s not unusual (as in most people have experienced it) then it is normal in our society. Normal literally means conforming to a standard, usual, typical, expected.