How to get 5 year old to eat more

[AliveAndSleeping]

Apologies but posting here for traffic.

DD is on the 2nd centile for weight and the 15th or so for height though she was born on the 75th. She's been seen several times by a pediatrician but they can't find anything wrong. I worry because she doesn't have as much stamina as other kids and it's starting to knock her confidence. Both the lack of stamina (and not being able to keep up with other kids physically) and always being the smallest. She keeps getting told that she's tiny by her classmates (and some adults) and it's starting to get to her. Doesn't help that she's the youngest in her class as well.

She just doesn't like to eat. She never seems hungry. She isn't super fussy but her portions are tiny. She's also a very slow eater. She just wants to talk or dream away. There are a few things that she seems to like but she doesn't have much of them either. Even chocolate she refuses most of the time (unlike her mumhmm) though she does like it.

We've tried everything. No pressure approach, bribery, getting her involved in food prep, playing games over dinner and setting a timer. At school she eats even less.

I'm getting desperate but I don't know what to do. All her clothes are too loose (and short) for her. Any ideas?

(She likes healthy food like vegetables and fruits but it's difficult to get enough calories into her. I add fat (olive oil or butter) to her food and am trying to increase her protein intake. She has a bottle of pediasure every day as well).

Test for coeliac
Is she growing along her centile?

The pediatrician said if she keeps losing weight or not gaining adequately till her next appointment that's the next thing they'll check but he won't see her for another 6 month.

She's slowly but gradually going down the centiles. She was born on the 75th, very quickly fell to 25th and as a toddler hovered between 9th and 25th. Now she's below the 2nd.

May seem an odd question but does she do enough exercise for her to feel hungry? Does she have breakfast?
Is the specialist telling you not to worry?
I know it's frowned upon but I used to let my DS watch tv while eating to get him to eat his veg . He is a healthy teen now and we always eat at the table and he is very sociable so it didn't have a long lasting negative effect oh and he eats his veg now too!

I second a check for coeliacs. Just make a GP appointment and get her checked. No need for paediatric appointment or to wait. Demand a blood test. My dd is coeliac and this was a key symptom.

Oh I second the tv too- terrible but my 5 year old eats more when watching tv

Does she like eggs? If yes I'd do small portions of scrambled egg or boiled egg as snacks. 1 egg with a tiny bit of double cream and a sprinkle of cheese, beaten together and cooked for 1 min in the microwave will make a very calorific snack.

If she likes smoothies then avocado, banana and frozen berries blitzed up would also be full of calories for a small cup.

Bananas frozen and then just blitzed are like banana icecream and easy to add extra calories like cream too.

Mashed ripe bananas mixed with an egg and then fried in dollops turn into banana pancakes, you can add ground almonds for a more traditional pancake texture and more calories.

Whatever foods she does like, try adding olive oil, mashed avocado, mashed banana, butter or cream to them to bulk up the calories.

You could try looking into:

Picky Eating and Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID)

Does she drink milk?

@whatnumber

May seem an odd question but does she do enough exercise for her to feel hungry? Does she have breakfast? Is the specialist telling you not to worry? I know it's frowned upon but I used to let my DS watch tv while eating to get him to eat his veg . He is a healthy teen now and we always eat at the table and he is very sociable so it didn't have a long lasting negative effect oh and he eats his veg now too!

Yes I think so @ exercise.

Yes we are pretty strict about breakfast but it's a slog. I actually feel bad because I can see how tough it is for her to get any good down that early. So now we give her a bottle of pediasure and some fruits and maybe a bite of bread.

We've tried showing her videos. She eats marginally more but someone needs to feed her and continuously prompt her to chew as she just forgets to eat or chew when watching something

@HalfShrunkMoreToGo

Does she like eggs? If yes I'd do small portions of scrambled egg or boiled egg as snacks. 1 egg with a tiny bit of double cream and a sprinkle of cheese, beaten together and cooked for 1 min in the microwave will make a very calorific snack.

If she likes smoothies then avocado, banana and frozen berries blitzed up would also be full of calories for a small cup.

Bananas frozen and then just blitzed are like banana icecream and easy to add extra calories like cream too.

Mashed ripe bananas mixed with an egg and then fried in dollops turn into banana pancakes, you can add ground almonds for a more traditional pancake texture and more calories.

Whatever foods she does like, try adding olive oil, mashed avocado, mashed banana, butter or cream to them to bulk up the calories.

Yes, I give her an egg either boiled or scrambled every few days. I'll try your recipe.

She doesn't have smoothies and hates bananas. I add a source of fat to all her food. Olive oil, butter or peanut butter, cheese, etc

Is there anything she loves, like pancakes? It's easy to slip all sorts into pancakes.

@Goldbar

Does she drink milk?

She either has a bottle of pediasure in the morning or a cup of milk and a cup of milk (about 150ml at the most) after dinner when I assume it won't interfere with her hunger for.later meals.

.I try to get jersey milk or anything with a high fat content

@Goldbar

Is there anything she loves, like pancakes? It's easy to slip all sorts into pancakes.

She doesn't love anything but she isn't super fussy either. She will eat pancake but just very little. Her favourite is pasta but even then she eats rather little.

My DC also isn't a big eater so I give them a small cup of (full-fat) milk with their afternoon snack.

It doesn't seem to affect their food intake, though - I wouldn't give it if they weren't eating dinner. They eat the same whether milk is offered or not.

DC has porridge made with full-fat milk in the morning, together with fruit and peanut butter toast.

@2toastornot2toast

I second a check for coeliacs. Just make a GP appointment and get her checked. No need for paediatric appointment or to wait. Demand a blood test. My dd is coeliac and this was a key symptom.

So the GP has just ordered a blood test and also referred her to the pediatrician. The blood test result came back as normal. Wouldn't they have checked for coeliac? Maybe they didn't because the pediatrician said that's the next thing to look into. I asked him if we shoukd try to cut out gluten vto see if it helps but he said that we shouldn't do anything for now.

I just looked up the symptoms and I'm not sure she has any of them except for poor appetite. If she was bloated would the bloating kick in very soon, ie within a few minutes to prevent her from.continuing to eat the same.meal?

Hmmmm shame about bananas and smoothies.

If she drinks milk, would she have hot chocolate or milkshake?

We used to make egg muffins for DD which she likes, she's always been a big fan of veg so I'd chop up peppers, mushrooms, spring onions (whatever she liked), mix it with beaten egg, pour it into cupcake cases and bake till firm. Then they'd be eaten cold with more veg on the side, they could be frozen and defrosted too so quick and easy.

DD went through a stage when a toddler where she basically wouldn't eat a meal, she would eat but only little bits at a time, just a couple of bites then she'd stop. I'd set up a snack plate or lunch box in the morning and leave it on the dining room table so she could help herself. Things like cheestrings/babybel. A pot with chopped up apple or celery smeared with peanut butter/cream cheese, crackers/carrot and hummus, cherry tomatoes, grapes, fridge raider chicken things or cocktail sausages.

It wasn't ideal, I would have preferred her to sit for a nice meal but she needed to be fed and it worked so we did it for a while and thankfully one day she was able to start eating in a more normal structure, but even now at 7 she prefers small meals and several small snacks. She's a natural grazer.

What does she have at school OP? Packed lunch or dinners?

If she's having school dinners, maybe swap her over to packed lunches and pack little portions of snack foods instead of a 'normal' lunch. Little pots of high calorie foods. That way you can see exactly how much she's eating of what.

Does she have a snack at school? My DD is 6 (in Yr1) and they get given a morning snack (usually fruit or veg, sometimes a homemade biscuit) and milk. DD is also very very slim, so I spoke to her teacher and she now takes in a Dunker and some cheese cubes to add to her morning snack, for a few extra calories.

I'd also try those Nourishment milkshakes in the tin. They're about the size of a can of coke but contain 400 odd calories, they really helped me gain weight and the flavours taste really good.

Don't cajole or pressure her in to eating, making mealtimes a battlefield will make things harder in the long run.
She'll eat when she's hungry.

It's so hard, and I know just how frustrating it is. If it makes you feel better, I used to eat like a bird when I was young but I did grow out of it and eat better now.

@HalfShrunkMoreToGo

Hmmmm shame about bananas and smoothies.

If she drinks milk, would she have hot chocolate or milkshake?

We used to make egg muffins for DD which she likes, she's always been a big fan of veg so I'd chop up peppers, mushrooms, spring onions (whatever she liked), mix it with beaten egg, pour it into cupcake cases and bake till firm. Then they'd be eaten cold with more veg on the side, they could be frozen and defrosted too so quick and easy.

DD went through a stage when a toddler where she basically wouldn't eat a meal, she would eat but only little bits at a time, just a couple of bites then she'd stop. I'd set up a snack plate or lunch box in the morning and leave it on the dining room table so she could help herself. Things like cheestrings/babybel. A pot with chopped up apple or celery smeared with peanut butter/cream cheese, crackers/carrot and hummus, cherry tomatoes, grapes, fridge raider chicken things or cocktail sausages.

It wasn't ideal, I would have preferred her to sit for a nice meal but she needed to be fed and it worked so we did it for a while and thankfully one day she was able to start eating in a more normal structure, but even now at 7 she prefers small meals and several small snacks. She's a natural grazer.

I've tried the egg muffins and she didn't like them but that was quite a while ago. I'll try again.

I should also give her more snacks. Usually if I put Something on a plate she'll just ignore it (except for fruits but again she prefers the lower calorie ones like berries ). She used to like cheese but now has gone off it.

I've started since this week taking a sandwich for the way home from school, which seems to be the only time when she's a bit hungry. I try to put something high fat / high protein in it like cheese or cold cuts or chicken slices. The loves ham and salami but I guess they are too unhealthy to have every day. She definitely eats less for dinner though if she has a snack in the afternoon.

Thanks tons for the suggestions everyone!!

nuts are v nutritious in any form - peanut butter or cashews to snack on or even nutella.

when my 4 year old took ages to eat, I would make eating 10 nuts into a counting game. how many nuts in this row? now eat two, now how many? etc.

and if she loves ham & salami, let her eat as much as she wants. At this point, the notion of what is healthy for an adult doesn't matter. you just want to let her get the calories.

@TinselTitsAndGlitteryBits

What does she have at school OP? Packed lunch or dinners?

If she's having school dinners, maybe swap her over to packed lunches and pack little portions of snack foods instead of a 'normal' lunch. Little pots of high calorie foods. That way you can see exactly how much she's eating of what.

Does she have a snack at school? My DD is 6 (in Yr1) and they get given a morning snack (usually fruit or veg, sometimes a homemade biscuit) and milk. DD is also very very slim, so I spoke to her teacher and she now takes in a Dunker and some cheese cubes to add to her morning snack, for a few extra calories.

I'd also try those Nourishment milkshakes in the tin. They're about the size of a can of coke but contain 400 odd calories, they really helped me gain weight and the flavours taste really good.

Don't cajole or pressure her in to eating, making mealtimes a battlefield will make things harder in the long run.
She'll eat when she's hungry.

It's so hard, and I know just how frustrating it is. If it makes you feel better, I used to eat like a bird when I was young but I did grow out of it and eat better now.

Thanks!!

She has dinner. I've asked her teacher to keep an eye on her eating and they usually report that she finishes her plate. She told me though that she takes a tiny portion as the teachers tell them off if they don't finish what they've taken. She gets a mid morning snack, which like that if your DD

What kind of nutritional milk shakes? Do you mean something like pediasure?.

@parietal

nuts are v nutritious in any form - peanut butter or cashews to snack on or even nutella.

when my 4 year old took ages to eat, I would make eating 10 nuts into a counting game. how many nuts in this row? now eat two, now how many? etc.

She's gone off peanut butter recently but I've just bought cashew butter mixed with almonds and cocoa. Apparently, cashews contain lots of zinc, which aids appetite. It is bes heavenly to me. I hope she'll like it

She absolutely loves maths games so I'll try that with the nuts!!

Oh if she like salami, Tesco do mini salami sausages in little snack packs, in my local they're near the hot deli in with all the special cheeses and breadsticks. They're brilliant, DD loves them, not highly flavoured just chewy little sausages.

DD is 7 and really tall, she cannot eat a proper dinner in the evening, we've figured out that she eats best in the morning, by dinner time she has a tiny plate of food. Today it was 2 spoons of cheesy mash and half a sausage.

I know this is a last resort but have you tried junk food?

Also, how big are you and her dad? If you're tiny, it's to be expected that she'll be small also