Nursery called social services after toddler’s black eye

[Mentalhealthcrisishelpplease]

I’m in bits and terrified here. Today my son was at nursery and my DM collected him. When she got home in the light, she noticed my DS, 20 months, had a black eye. She called me and asked if I had seen it before nursery and I said no. She called the nursery and asked what had happened, and one of the girls was very rambled in saying that my son had fallen from the slide and hit the side of his eye on the wood, and that they had applied a cold compress, and then he was wobbly.

2 minutes later the manager called me in a hurry, nervously apologising and saying how angry she was with her staff for not calling me or updating our ParentZone app. In our contract it states that we as the parents are always notified if something happens like this.

It raised concerns with me, and I said I was sorry but I was going to pull DS from nursery due to negligence.

She accepted this and cancelled December’s sessions, however 15 minutes later I received a call from her saying she had contacted child’s services, because I had ‘too abruptly’ removed my son from nursery which made them suspicious.

So now, I’m going to have a call from social services and a toddler with an ever-developing black eye.

Someone please tell me it’s going to be okay :(

Oh and those saying the OP overreacted- not telling a parent that their child was “wobbly” after a head injury is pretty bloody important!!!

Have none of you ever heard of concussion??

I highly doubt the nursery is making a malicious complaint. They are regulated and inspected by social services and aren’t going to do something so stupid as it would effect their scoring and reputation.
Like I said above- what I suspect is that they aren’t 100% sure what happened and are making sure the bruise wasn’t already there.
It also is best practice to inform a parent when a cause of concern goes in to social services so the nursery manager telling the OP is completely normal procedure.

You need to have a copy of the accident report and the first aid given

You also need to report to ofsted and the LA

Yeah but them ringing up and saying “we lied about how this happened and actually we think it was at home and we didn’t notice when the child arrived, and now the parents have queried it with us we’ve lied to them but we think it’s “suspicious” that they’re removing their child”

yeah that’s not going to hurt their reputation at all. They’re being bloody stupid however you look at this.

Report the nursery to Ofsted. Injured child, failure to follow procedures, then made a revenge report to SS because you fired them.

That’s a malicious report. I would be complaining to Ofsted. I say this as a nursery manager.

@MissM2912

I highly doubt the nursery is making a malicious complaint. They are regulated and inspected by social services and aren’t going to do something so stupid as it would effect their scoring and reputation. Like I said above- what I suspect is that they aren’t 100% sure what happened and are making sure the bruise wasn’t already there. It also is best practice to inform a parent when a cause of concern goes in to social services so the nursery manager telling the OP is completely normal procedure.

In England they aren't regulated or inspected by social services. Ofsted regulate childcare.

Definitely do what ABC and Flower recommended to get everything in writing ASAP. If you do have any more phone conversations send an email afterwards of the "Further to our phone conversation this morning during which you stated XYZ.." variety

I’m not sure why you pulled him from the nursery, children injure themselves all the time and sometimes notifications to parents don’t get done straight away. Mistakes happen. I could understand if it was a reoccurring theme but if it’s a one off then I’d have just put them on notice. All my DCs have injured themselves and have had instances where school and nursery havnt notified me immediately.

I think they have overreacted reporting you but they probably see your reaction as an overreaction too.

As for worrying, you know the injury happened at nursery so do they so I wouldn’t worry about it.

Put him in a new nursery.
Review that nursery with the exact same story you told here.

She reported you to cover her arse. Is there someone you can report malpractice to? Appalling behaviour from them and I can't imagine it's the first time.

Are you sure this is the full story? Maybe they made the call based on your reaction to the accident?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feeling_depressed/4416798-In-crisis-but-I-m-scared-to-go-to-the-hospital-last-thread-removed?pg=2

I think them saying that they didn’t notice at first will be totally understandable with multiple children.
With regards to making something up I would imagine they will just say it was an inexperienced member of staff who panicked - happens all the time in child protection situations.
At the end of the day social services genuinely won’t be interested in that level of details. They will just look at what is on the cause for concern ie-

• nursery manager is concerned about child’s sudden removal from nursery after child is found to have black eye. Nursery manager can not be 100% when the child received black eye- suspects it could have happened in the nursery setting when child fell but parent has now contacted to say bruise is more pronounced than they were aware at nursery and is removing child disproportionately and feels social services should be aware.’

Then up to social services to decide to do with this information.

fallen from the slide and hit the side of his eye on the wood, and that they had applied a cold compress, and then he was wobbly.

That sounds a bit like concussion I think if he was wobbly. I’m not sure but I know when my DS hit his head at school (they down played it and didn’t check him out properly) he presented as tired and nauseous later that day. A bit like he was drunk. I looked it up and think he was concussed. Might be worth reading up on it to see what the advice is.

Social Services will be fine. They are there to help and will do a proper assessment. They won’t just take the Nursery’s word for it. That does sound like the nursery are being malicious. Really poor not to tell you and really poor not to treat it as a possible head injury.

Don't worry, it will be fine. A trainee health visitor reported me to SS because my mixed race baby had Mongolian blue patches. SS came out as it was described as severe bruising. It was quickly resolved.

Your child is not of statutory education age. Nursery is not compulsory. You can take your child out whenever you want. Its not a red flag unless there have been other concerns.

If you had not turned up at nursery without telling them they might have a point. They shouldn't be reporting every family who remove their child from non statutory child care.

Its bloody ridiculous. Don't worry about the black eye, you can explain it to SS and let them know it happened at nursery.
I would make a formal complaint about the nursery. Their behaviour is appalling.

As for comparing this to the death of that little boy, I am speechless.
Bad safeguarding is not better than none. They can both end in needless distress.

NellieBertram They are still regulated work and have minimum standards they have to meet.

Don’t worry Op, all will be fine. I agree with other PP, it’s malicious, pathetic. Report them to ofsted. It’s dangerous to see this happen & not inform you. Your child could have a concussion. I would remove my child too, your not over reacting you need to be sure your child is being looked after x

You're not at fault and the nursery have already stated that it happened in their care. They should have called you when it happened though. I sent my son to school today and for the first time ever he has a little cut on his face, I said yesterday after our roast 'aw, look at dad, how can he sleep so peacefully with all this racket?' and my ds7 said 'I can fix that!' and went to jump on dad's stomach. As he did I shouted no and my son aged 9 just put his fingers out. Ended up with a weird scratch right by his eye.
I was so scared to send him today (have massive anxiety!) I honestly was waiting all day for a phone call or email asking how it happened, then worrying they'd think I was blaming my elder son! so
Try not to worry

Wonder how her phone call went with social services.
Hi I want to report a parent for removing her child from my nursery after child injured themselves here resulting in a blackeye and we the nursery failed to notify the parent about this.
If any1 should be reporting anything its you to ofsted about how they have handled it.

I've managed a nursery before and had a lot of involvement with ss. I would think there might be something more for them to contact ss rather than an abrupt decision to take your child out of nursery?! They won't do anything or even get involved unless they can see there is risk of harm and in this case I'd be more worried there was risk of harm from the nursery than home if this was genuinely the only incident.

Very bizarre reaction from the nursery manager that I can't wrap my head around from one incident! (They will have referred to a consultation service rather than ss who will deem need based on severity of the situation, very much doubt you will have a knock on the door from ss!)

I would call the NHS number and speak to a nurse. You need it on record that you took responsibility of the injury as soon as you were made aware.

I would be emailed ofsted and my mp, and ccing the nursery straight after I dealt with the NHS.

You will become a scapegoat and they will lie to save their business if you don't get your side as a formal record.

They are disgusting for this.

Do they know about this background? They could be putting two and two together and getting five if this is the case and could just be worried. I'd rather someone be too cautious with a young child than not!

However I wouldn't worry! As I said in my previous post, they will see your doing fine and it was the nursery at fault and they'll go away again.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feeling_depressed/4416798-In-crisis-but-I-m-scared-to-go-to-the-hospital-last-thread-removed?pg=2

Please get him checked out by a Dr regardless. I don't think they've been completely honest with you so I'd like some reassurance he is OK
SS will want the complete series of events so you will have nothing to worry about
I would have removed my child too

@Emanchego

It's good the did. Read about Arthur Labinjo-Hughes. They did the right thing 👍

It sounds like a malicious report intended to cover their own back actually and given the pressure SS are under they are wasting valuable time that should be spent on children who really do need their help. I would be furious.