Nursery called social services after toddler’s black eye

[Mentalhealthcrisishelpplease]

I’m in bits and terrified here. Today my son was at nursery and my DM collected him. When she got home in the light, she noticed my DS, 20 months, had a black eye. She called me and asked if I had seen it before nursery and I said no. She called the nursery and asked what had happened, and one of the girls was very rambled in saying that my son had fallen from the slide and hit the side of his eye on the wood, and that they had applied a cold compress, and then he was wobbly.

2 minutes later the manager called me in a hurry, nervously apologising and saying how angry she was with her staff for not calling me or updating our ParentZone app. In our contract it states that we as the parents are always notified if something happens like this.

It raised concerns with me, and I said I was sorry but I was going to pull DS from nursery due to negligence.

She accepted this and cancelled December’s sessions, however 15 minutes later I received a call from her saying she had contacted child’s services, because I had ‘too abruptly’ removed my son from nursery which made them suspicious.

So now, I’m going to have a call from social services and a toddler with an ever-developing black eye.

Someone please tell me it’s going to be okay :(

It's malicious and SS will close the case fairly quickly when you explain it. We had the school call SS on us because one of the kids was "drawing willies on everything" during art. They didn't even pay us a home visit and (fortunately) saw the funny side.

At the end of the school year, I received the usual swathes of school work in the book bag... but this time with curious little black marker pen scribbles in places where the teachers had furiously redacted the penises. If I hold the paper up to the light, I can still make them out.

I don't keep a lot of school work, but I did keep those.

I know he's your baby but it feels a bit like an over reaction on your part. Kids hurt themselves all the time at nursery.

It's good the did. Read about Arthur Labinjo-Hughes. They did the right thing 👍

Unless your child has to attend nursery because of former SS involvement, I doubt they’ll care.

@Emanchego

It's good the did. Read about Arthur Labinjo-Hughes. They did the right thing 👍

No they haven't, they fucked up by not following the correct procedures, op said she was stopping her child going due to negligence and they have threatened to report her first.

Let's not use his name to justify malicious reporting.

It'll be fine, explain what happened if they contact you. Let them know that your Mum will corroborate what happened. It's unusual for DC to be removed with immediate effect, but that generally because the parents need to find alternative childcare first. If that doesn't apply to you then there's nothing at all odd about removing him from somewhere that doesn't have the correct safety protocols in place.

When DS was little and we adopted him there was a intermediate stage between him coming to live with us and the adoption being finalised. We had a social worker visit every six weeks or so. Somehow DS managed to fall and bruise his face before almost every visit. The social worker noted it on his file but was very unconcerned because it's normal for active kids to sometimes get bruises.

@Emanchego

It's good the did. Read about Arthur Labinjo-Hughes. They did the right thing 👍

There's no need to mention Arthur, especially as the Op is already worried. The accident happened at nursery and OP acted reasonably in withdrawing him. She hasn't been informed about a serious injury and nursery acted unprofessionally in the way they dealt with the incident.

@Emanchego

It's good the did. Read about Arthur Labinjo-Hughes. They did the right thing 👍

What on Earth does that have to do with this? This child hurt himself at nursery, they didn’t bother telling anyone, and the mother of the child was annoyed and worried at this and said he won’t be back.

Are we are to forget safeguarding exists because a parent gets pissed off?
In this instance the nursery failed in their dirt of care, it’s a rectifiable situation. You acted hastily in removing your child so the nursery has to report it. SS will investigate seeing as the nursery have said it happened on their time you’ve nothing to worry about

This is disgusting behaviour by the nursery, malicious, and I'd be making a complaint.

I would have loved to hear her explain that to social services..

"A woman pays for us to take care of her child, however he fell off a slide and bruised his eye and we failed to tell her. When she discovered this, she removed him from our nursery due to our negligence. This makes us very suspicious".

My god, she must be joking.
Call Ofsted.

I’m trying to work out the story they’re coming up with in their heads at that nursery.. ?!

I would be having words with that manager to find out.

I think the nursery probably had to refer themselves to sc as the child was injured in their care and they haven't followed their own procedures. There's a name for this process but can't recall it.

Why they've said it's because of you is beyond me

You acted hastily in removing your child so the nursery has to report it.

The nursery don't have to report it.

The OP's child has been injured and she hasn't been informed by the nursery. Because of this negligence the OP has chosen to remove him. It's a perfectly reasonable action to the situation, and there's nothing for the nursery to report.

Why would a nursery report to social services if they knew they themselves they had been negligent and the child injured themselves on their watch.
What I suspect has happened is they don’t know when the child got the black eye and the first person spoken too panicked and made something up.

@Itsalmostanaccessory

That's a malicious report. I would be raising merry hell about this.

Your toddler was injured whilst in their care and you chose to remove him because they didnt even inform you. That's your choice to make. Immediately after removing him, they report you to social services? No. Not on. That's malicious.

Contact Ofsted. Contact your MP. I would be dragging that nursery through the mud.

This

Seems very strange

@Itsalmostanaccessory

That's a malicious report. I would be raising merry hell about this.

Your toddler was injured whilst in their care and you chose to remove him because they didnt even inform you. That's your choice to make. Immediately after removing him, they report you to social services? No. Not on. That's malicious.

Contact Ofsted. Contact your MP. I would be dragging that nursery through the mud.

This

"It's good the did. Read about Arthur Labinjo-Hughes. They did the right thing"

Not bothering to inform the parents of a child who has hit their head hard enough to develop a black eye and be "wobbly" more than a few seconds afterwards, and just leaving him till home time without getting him checked out by a doctor, is not "doing the right thing".

Contact the nursery to see their accident book. They should have shown this to your mother when she collected your son.
The nursery is in the wrong in a lot of levels and the call tonSS seems to be to deflect from themselves. As the injury happened at nursery and they’ve stated that to you, their call to SS will be seen as odd, to put it lightly.

Just for tonight I would be sending an email detailing exactly what happened, why you're removing your son, and that you feel the complaint they threatened you with is malicious.

I would also write the full conversation with the nursery manager down while it's fresh in your mind.

I wouldn't have any further phone contact and do everything by email.

Contact the nursey and get a copy of the accident form/report from them, so you have it in writing that he was injured in their setting. SS won't be worried from your point of view. However speaking as a nursery worker I would contact OFSTED and report the nursery setting.

Their report seems like a nonsense to me, wasting everybody’s time. But you also hugely over reacted, it will soon become untenable to whip your child out of nursery, club, school or whatever every time he has an accident.

”A woman pays for us to take care of her child, however he fell off a slide and bruised his eye and we failed to tell her. When she discovered this, she removed him from our nursery due to our negligence. This makes us very suspicious"

This. They’re reporting you for removing your child from an environment that failed in its duty of care (by not telling you about the accident/the after effects).

When you report them to ofsted/to wherever you can think of, make sure you mention that they do not dispute that the accident happened while he was at nursery. Because their reporting makes absolutely no sense given that, and can only possibly be malicious.

You’ve done the right thing in removing him. Keep detailed notes of the phone calls. Screenshot the record of calls to/from nursery.