Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wish schools would scrap Christmas jumper day?

408 replies

Notspeakingup · 04/12/2021 17:59

DC2 has a couple of little classmates with difficult home lives, one in particular without much money. There are some Christmas jumper days coming up and I have been thinking about how tough it must be to always be the child with no jumper.

I know as children grow up you can't avoid the inequalities but it would be great if we could at least stop it being an issue at primary school. (And of course there are the families who buy jumpers when they can't really afford them).

OP posts:
Cam2020 · 04/12/2021 21:44

My DD loves a Christmas jumper and will wear one at any opportunity (but she is only 4), so I don't personally see it as waste for us. Always plenty in charity shop windows and free on selling groups so I don't think cost is much of an issue. If she wasn't into it, I'd probably just make or get some sort of applique or something for an old jumper.

She missed out on wear your football kit day ay nursery last year because she doesn't have one and was largely unaware of professional football until the world cup. She felt miffed but she lived!

People are different and that always impacts their children, whether that be economic differences, beliefs or a complete lack of interest (as with us and the world cup). It's uncomfortable but inevitable. I think children become aware of the difference quite early on, sadly.

I agree a PTA run swap would be great and I'd always happily donate to the school to spare a child feeling left out, though.

Babyshadows · 04/12/2021 21:46

I buy Xmas pajamas and send them in the top from that. It's fine for the day and then they wear the pjs all year round

GoodnightGrandma · 04/12/2021 21:46

I remember that we made crowns to wear at the school Xmas party, as not everyone put party clothes on. Perhaps they didn’t have clothes to change into.

MehhyMehMeh · 04/12/2021 21:47

Yep. Our school is also making the kids do a sponsored thing on Christmas jumper day, (well one of them they're having two.) So not only do we need to fork out on new jumpers that they'll wear twice, but we have to send money in too, and are guilted into sending in extra ourselves as we hardly have any family left to sponsor the stupid, crappy 'fun' thing that my children will hate.

Ivalueloyaltyaboveallelse · 04/12/2021 21:53

Yeah it’s not the best idea. Its definitely added pressure for parents. I always bring my DCs old Christmas jumpers (my DC grow very quick and I’m a bit of a hoarder) along on Christmas jumper day as back up plan for any children who’s parents have forgotten or can’t afford to do so. Luckily no one has taken offence so far but I've only passed out three.

Breadpapercone · 04/12/2021 22:22

cpag.org.uk/cost-of-the-school-day

fournonblondes · 04/12/2021 22:25

May more creativity should be encouraged to use recycle items to attach to jumpers. It is a fun day I would not scrape it entirely.

NewlyJingle2021 · 04/12/2021 22:31

My DC school are not only doing the Xmas jumper day (suggested donation of £1) but they are also asking the kids to wear Xmas jumpers for 2 days the following week for the nativity and other activities. So realistically that's going to require multiple Xmas jumpers, or else somehow washing and drying the same 1 overnight for the following day. Or else they'll have to wear a dirty jumper on day 2. There is no way either child will keep it clean on day 1. We are in a deprived area and usually the school provide the nativity costumes which I always thought was good, so this is a change for the worse. Some families will literally have no heating and be living off food banks right now. I'm on UC but thankfully not as badly off as some of our local families, but I can't stretch to a load of new overpriced jumpers, I'm hoping last year's still fit the kids or that maybe that their dad will spring for a couple. It's especially annoyed me as it's coming off the back of many other themed and 'suggested item of clothing and donation' days in recent weeks.

CheshireChat · 04/12/2021 22:35

My son's school is usually really supportive, but this year they're doing Christmas jumper week so it makes it harder to ignore, I was quite surprised.

However, the wear it once and get rid part- I think YABU as that's a choice. I know my son will need one jumper (at least) for the cold season so that can be a Christmassy jumper and he'll wear it as long as it's suitable for the weather. No Christmas jumper this year or the last as he wanted to wear the one my mum knitted for him.

I do the same with Christmas and Halloween PJs as I know he'll need new long sleeve ones around that time of year so just pick holiday themed ones. Then they get worn until he outgrows them.

JustLyra · 04/12/2021 22:47

@Cam2020

My DD loves a Christmas jumper and will wear one at any opportunity (but she is only 4), so I don't personally see it as waste for us. Always plenty in charity shop windows and free on selling groups so I don't think cost is much of an issue. If she wasn't into it, I'd probably just make or get some sort of applique or something for an old jumper.

She missed out on wear your football kit day ay nursery last year because she doesn't have one and was largely unaware of professional football until the world cup. She felt miffed but she lived!

People are different and that always impacts their children, whether that be economic differences, beliefs or a complete lack of interest (as with us and the world cup). It's uncomfortable but inevitable. I think children become aware of the difference quite early on, sadly.

I agree a PTA run swap would be great and I'd always happily donate to the school to spare a child feeling left out, though.

There’s a huge difference between a child missing out on one event occasionally and the same children missing out repeatedly (which is what happens)
AdventStar · 04/12/2021 22:50

@BoredZelda

Penalised? No. Open to bullying? Yep.

If kids are getting bullied for it, they are getting bullied for the rest of the year too.

Well, this could be the thing that starts it off. "Steve is so poor he couldn't even wear a Christmas jumper last year! I don't want to play with the poor, let's not any more."

And it isn't virtue signalling. WTF?

Gem176 · 04/12/2021 23:16

I keep the kids ones and pick up others from sales rails after Christmas then offer them on our local children's buy, swap, sell page the following November for free. The adult ones get reused, otherwise it's very wasteful.

BoardingSchoolMater · 04/12/2021 23:19

@XelaM

Everyone owns a jumper. Just pin some tinsel and a few Christmassy things on it and you have a Christmas jumper. Doesn't have to be anything expensive
I mentioned this upthread (it's what I always did for the DC), but the idea of DIY Christmas jumpers for free seems to have got lost in the outrage about having to buy them. Again: you don't have to buy them!
Original poster
Notspeakingup · 04/12/2021 23:32

lost in the outrage...
Addressed in numerous posts.

OP posts:
Xmasbaby11 · 04/12/2021 23:35

We do a swap shop at our school. Also it's fine and common to just wear something red, tinsel, generally festive looking.

We can afford Xmas jumpers but appreciate the school is so inclusive.

Glitterblue · 04/12/2021 23:39

DD's school has a shop where we can donate uniforms, PE kits, football boots etc and Christmas jumpers and they sell them at very manageable prices, my friend said they were charging 50p per shirt. I think that's a great idea.

Rosebel · 04/12/2021 23:41

Mine are at secondary school and they still have this ridiculous shit. I can't afford to do it so youngest will just borrow her sisters as she's at hospital that day.
It's bad enough at primary school but I'd hoped by secondary school they would stop that and concentrate on teaching the kids.

ichundich · 04/12/2021 23:54

I agree, so wasteful. I only buy them second-hand nowadays.

batmanladybird · 04/12/2021 23:59

@TheYearOfSmallThings

I don't mind Christmas jumper day - I've bought him a long sleeved Christmas t-shirt from Primark for £1.70, which he will wear for all Christmas shenanigans this year.

Scientist day, Pirate Day and Tudoe Peasant day on the other hand...

But a £1.70 Primary top has a higher cost somewhere
nocutsnobuttsnococonuts · 05/12/2021 00:16

My dds school has always done Christmas jumper day, im a firm believer in second hand so my girls always had one which was then passed down and on to another family once dd2 grew out of it.

But this year they have decided to introduce prizes for most creative and handmade. Which is great if you have something spare to make Christmassy or the extra money to buy supplies to decorate it. Plus the time which many parents don't have. It has really annoyed me as the children you speak of that won't have one due to cost/poor living environment most certainly won't have a lovely hand decorated jumper. Another way to make parents feel crappy and children whose parents lack time/inclination to stand out. As much as I want to send dd in her hand me down Christmas jumper we will probably end up decorating something. To me that is worse for the environment as who is going to want a hastily handmade Christmas top?!

tsmainsqueeze · 05/12/2021 00:16

I hate anything like xmas jumper day that potentially causes a worry / financial difficulty for a parent and upset for a child that may not be able to participate.
In an ideal world school activities should be all inclusive , there are plenty of alternatives that cost nothing .
One christmas i stitched pound shop fairy lights onto a regular jumper it looked great.

JustLyra · 05/12/2021 00:28

I mentioned this upthread (it's what I always did for the DC), but the idea of DIY Christmas jumpers for free seems to have got lost in the outrage about having to buy them. Again: you don't have to buy them!

You still have to buy the stuff that goes on the DIY jumpers - which for people who can’t afford £2 in the charity shop is still an expense they can’t afford.

Plus that then opens those one or two children up to sticking out like a sore thumb amongst the hoardes pf shiny new jumpers

Franticbutterfly · 05/12/2021 01:14

@mayblossominapril

I think it would be good if there was more of a second hand trade in Christmas jumpers at school. Both to provide cheap Christmas jumpers and raise a little money. I carefully choose the Christmas pjs and he wears the top as his Christmas jumper then after that wears them as pjs until he grows out of them!
This!
safclass · 05/12/2021 01:41

We run a youth group and we do wear Xmas jumpers for certain days, however at start of Dec we bring in ones the kids have outgrown and lay them out and people can choose one for free.
It is such a waste and as PP have said they're lucky to get 2/3 wears out of them so they are usually immaculate.
A parent told their primary school who have also started doing it. Think they ask for a small donation and families who struggle are given free.

MaryShelley1818 · 05/12/2021 06:09

Definitely a good idea to have a second hand collection at school, I'd be happy to donate our Xmas Jumpers after the season.

Me and DH have both had our Christmas jumpers for several years now, I won't be replacing mine until it falls apart. DS (3) and DD (10mths) both got a few Christmas tops/jumpers each second hand. DS will wear his for 2yrs as bought them slightly bigger.
We also wear them often throughout December though, DS has had his on for 3 occasions now already.