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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you report someone to SS for having CCTV in their home

123 replies

Tilltheend99 · 04/12/2021 11:22

As it says really. And hopefully this isn’t outing.

Some extended family have cameras all over their home including bedroom.

The original reason was that the stepchildren were supposedly stealing money but they have since moved out on their own as over 16.

Don’t see them often and even less since lockdown do can’t say if cameras are currently still up.

The primary age child they share presents as fed/well clothed/articulate plus no signs of physical abuse. The whole thing was more about pfb vs scs’. Mother is very gregarious and loving. Father is classic boring bloke with hobbies but perhaps a bit odd.

So basically I have no reason to suspect anything that I would contact social services about but the CCTV has never sat comfortably with me and since reading about the sad case of Arthur I am wondering again if this alone is enough of a red flag to contact ss?

So UABU: having cameras up all over the house is considered normal now and is not enough to report or

UANBU: having CCTV removes the child’s right to privacy in their own house and you would report?

Just interested to see what other people think or if I am blowing this out of proportion.

They used to throw large family parties before Covid and no one else seemed bothered by the CCTV. (TV in kitchen so not hiding it from anyone)

I tried to find a topic to post under but couldn’t find one suitable so sorry if this is in the wrong place.

OP posts:
gunnersgold · 04/12/2021 12:15

We have ring cameras in most communal rooms in our house and in our sons room ( he has sn ) . What's the issue ? It's for safety and security ! I'd be furious if you called ss on me ! 🙄

trappedsincesundaymorn · 04/12/2021 12:16

[quote authenticforgery]@MNHQ make it stop.[/quote]
Hear, hear.

me4real · 04/12/2021 12:18

I don't think they would laugh as such, but I don't think SS would see people having cameras as much of a problem.

Original poster
Tilltheend99 · 04/12/2021 12:18

Think I have discovered that I am being unreasonable Xmas Wink and probably overreacting to the headlines etc

Going to metaphorically for home now and have a cup of tea but might come back if there are any other interesting points. Thanks people.

OP posts:
BungleandGeorge · 04/12/2021 12:19

How old is the primary age child? It seems very inappropriate in a bedroom surely the child needs the option of some privacy.

LuneyTunes · 04/12/2021 12:20

I do not get this internal CCTV craze. Why would you want to be watched in your private space, the one space you can be sure there are no cameras? Weeeeird

ivfbabymomma1 · 04/12/2021 12:22

Oh god I have cameras in our front room and hall to watch the dogs whilst we are out / security, a camera in our 2 year olds room & a ring camera outside. (The indoor cameras don't record and only show live footage)

It never occurred to me that someone would see this and think SS we needed?! Wtf!

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2021 12:22

I think it’s weird too @LuneyTunes, unless there is a genuine specific reason. But just to watch what everyone is doing in the house is really strange

julieca · 04/12/2021 12:22

I would report it and let SS decide if it is an issue.

julieca · 04/12/2021 12:23

It might mean nothing, or it might mean one or both parents are over-controlling and coercive. You will be unable to decide that OP. So just report please.

BungleandGeorge · 04/12/2021 12:27

@ivfbabymomma1

Oh god I have cameras in our front room and hall to watch the dogs whilst we are out / security, a camera in our 2 year olds room & a ring camera outside. (The indoor cameras don't record and only show live footage)

It never occurred to me that someone would see this and think SS we needed?! Wtf!

Big difference between a 2 year old and a child at primary. Personally I don’t like the idea of cameras in bedrooms at all but can see why some would choose to have them with little kids. There comes a point when kids want some privacy and to be able to close their bedroom door, and it’s not when they’re very old, definitely at primary stage! An average child of primary age doesn’t need cameras for safety
RhondaZ · 04/12/2021 12:27

@LittleMysSister

Why would CCTV would be an indicator of anything? [Hmm]
Everyone is entitled to privacy.
SW1amp · 04/12/2021 12:29

@julieca

I would report it and let SS decide if it is an issue.
Yeah, and while you’re at it, you might as well report me for making my kids have vegetables when they ask for chips

Because if there is one thing I know about social services, it’s that they have WAY too much time on their hands and are crying out for nonsense reports for them to have to do loads of paperwork about

Drunkpanda · 04/12/2021 12:33

@julieca

I would report it and let SS decide if it is an issue.
It may be one piece in a bigger jigsaw puzzle. They won't have time to investigate it but the info is there if something else happens.
PinkPrettyPearls · 04/12/2021 12:41

@TokyoDreaming

Get a life OP for fucks sake.
This really.
SW1amp · 04/12/2021 12:43

@Drunkpanda

And the reports of actual abuse that can’t be properly followed up, because the social workers are too busy looking into your total non-issue?
What about those kids? You’re happy for them to keep living in squalor or abuse because some idiot thinks having a Ring cam might be a warning sign?

PlanktonsComputerWife · 04/12/2021 12:46

This species really does seem to be devolving.

Drunkpanda · 04/12/2021 12:46

I don't believe they would look into it. I think it would go in a file somewhere. Yes that would take minutes. But if a report comes in later from one of the dc and this is then added to the fact that they are being watched in their bedrooms...
In schools we are told to pass on anything that makes us uncomfortable. So that is what I would do.

KaptainKaveman · 04/12/2021 12:49

@Tilltheend99

As it says really. And hopefully this isn’t outing.

Some extended family have cameras all over their home including bedroom.

The original reason was that the stepchildren were supposedly stealing money but they have since moved out on their own as over 16.

Don’t see them often and even less since lockdown do can’t say if cameras are currently still up.

The primary age child they share presents as fed/well clothed/articulate plus no signs of physical abuse. The whole thing was more about pfb vs scs’. Mother is very gregarious and loving. Father is classic boring bloke with hobbies but perhaps a bit odd.

So basically I have no reason to suspect anything that I would contact social services about but the CCTV has never sat comfortably with me and since reading about the sad case of Arthur I am wondering again if this alone is enough of a red flag to contact ss?

So UABU: having cameras up all over the house is considered normal now and is not enough to report or

UANBU: having CCTV removes the child’s right to privacy in their own house and you would report?

Just interested to see what other people think or if I am blowing this out of proportion.

They used to throw large family parties before Covid and no one else seemed bothered by the CCTV. (TV in kitchen so not hiding it from anyone)

I tried to find a topic to post under but couldn’t find one suitable so sorry if this is in the wrong place.

the sad case of Arthur

And there is it. Again. Competitive grieving for someone you don't know. Seriously, WTF, OP?

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2021 12:50

I would have thought the posts of ‘get a life’ ‘stop being a busy body’ etc would have stopped. Safeguarding is everyone’s business. If it feels a bit off report it. Might make other people think on here whether it is actually necessary to have cameras on in the house when people are in the house, so not for security reasons, unless you have a mansion.

SW1amp · 04/12/2021 12:52

@Drunkpanda

I don't believe they would look into it. I think it would go in a file somewhere. Yes that would take minutes. But if a report comes in later from one of the dc and this is then added to the fact that they are being watched in their bedrooms... In schools we are told to pass on anything that makes us uncomfortable. So that is what I would do.
Oh brilliant, so you haven’t actually read the thread then…

Because OP says they aren’t being ‘watched in their bedrooms’

So you are encouraging a totally pointless and time wasting report to social services based on your inability to read posts properly

NameChange2PostThis · 04/12/2021 12:52

Oh the handwringing and mocking from the posters with ring doorbells, baby monitors, and front hall cctv failing to see the issue Hmm

@Tilltheend99 YANBU Article 16 of the UNCRC makes it clear that children and young people have the right to privacy, just like adults do, including the right to a private space where they can go to be alone. You are describing a home situation where a child of primary school age only has bodily privacy in the bathroom and whose bedroom activities are live streamed into a communal room where guests to the home might be present. This is also a household that used CCTV to monitor older step children when they were living there.

These are all red flags for abuse. Please report to someone. It doesn’t have to be social services. You could call the safeguarding lead at the child’s school (I would recommend this), or childline, or the NSPCC for advice.

PLEASE don’t ignore this. Even if the parents are lovely and are ‘just’ overprotective, this is a toxic environment for a child. This family needs help.

julieca · 04/12/2021 12:54

I agree these are possible red flags for abuse. And I think SS would be interested.

Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow · 04/12/2021 12:57

@ByThePool2021

Erm don’t all parents have baby cams in their child’s room at some point? Yes bathroom is a little dodgy but it’s quite common practise so I can’t see SS getting involved
Do they?? We never did!
regularbutnamechangedd · 04/12/2021 12:58

I have a Blink cam in my 7yo DC's room because they are autistic and have learning disabilities and I need to be able to check they're ok. So report me by all means.