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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Expected my 6 yr old to stand on the bus…

155 replies

TheViewFromTheCheapSeats · 30/11/2021 12:16

Aibu. Bus was full with everyone at a window seat, but most aisle seats free.

Got on, I stood with the older ones but told my just six year old to sit. It’s a little jerky bus and also has few steps to fall down. She’s the kind of kid to fall, looks young so no way they thought she was older

4 women (each around age 30-50) put bags down or shooed her away from the empty seat next to them.

‘Social distancing’. Aibu to have been annoyed and spoken to them and told one to move her bag? In the end one flounced off dramatically and said she’d walk the last stop.

OP posts:
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 30/11/2021 12:18

Yanbu

Social distancing doesn’t mean two seats each on buses. People should be prepared to have someone beside them, or stand themselves (unless they have particular difficulty with this)

Confrontayshunme · 30/11/2021 12:19

They wanted physical space and you instructed your child to invade it. You don't know whether they are vulnerable and schoolchildren are the most infectious right now. Not in a pandemic? It would have been fine. Now? You were definitely BU.

Original poster
TheViewFromTheCheapSeats · 30/11/2021 12:19

I mentioned the dramatic flounce as she appeared to be very capable of standing if she could stomp

OP posts:
thistimelastweek · 30/11/2021 12:21

When I was a kid, many moons ago, children were expected to give up their seats for all and any adult regardless of age on either side.
It was ridiculous. Tiny children without the strength to maintain their balance being buffeted about whilst strong healthy adults sat on their arses.

OP, you are not being ridiculous.

gamerchick · 30/11/2021 12:21

I always let little kids sit down on a full bus. They're more likely to fall and that's scary in amongst big people.

tallduckandhandsome · 30/11/2021 12:22

YANBU, if the bus company says you can sit there then these people have no right to shoo away your dd.

If they have a problem then they should be the ones to leave.

Original poster
TheViewFromTheCheapSeats · 30/11/2021 12:22

1- why should a child stand, and fall (less to hold onto when you are short and more likely to fall, I’d stand for a child personally if I wanted space. If you want two seats don’t get the busy at a busy time.
2- it’s a busy bus. Me standing a seat lengths away isn’t really a big difference to child sitting below her face height.

OP posts:
SickAndTiredAgain · 30/11/2021 12:25

YANBU at all. You can’t get on a bus and expect no one to sit next to you. The bus I get to work is absolutely rammed.

Cheeseplantboots · 30/11/2021 12:27

Of course you’re not being unreasonable as you can see from the majority Of same people on this thread .

Cheeseplantboots · 30/11/2021 12:27

Sane people!

3scape · 30/11/2021 12:27

The old fashioned approach of getting children to stand pre dates women in their 40s! When I was a child in the 70s it was only teens who were expected to stand. Young children were sat on parent/ grand knees mainly though. Shooing away children from taking a seat is ridiculous and entitled behaviour.

MrsArchchancellorRidcully · 30/11/2021 12:28

@Confrontayshunme

They wanted physical space and you instructed your child to invade it. You don't know whether they are vulnerable and schoolchildren are the most infectious right now. Not in a pandemic? It would have been fine. Now? You were definitely BU.
UANBU These 'ladies' were being ridiculous as is @Confrontayshunme

Sit small kids in seat. Ffs. We have vaccines?

RedWingBoots · 30/11/2021 12:29

@Confrontayshunme

They wanted physical space and you instructed your child to invade it. You don't know whether they are vulnerable and schoolchildren are the most infectious right now. Not in a pandemic? It would have been fine. Now? You were definitely BU.
If you are that vulnerable due to the poor adherence to mask wearing in England you wouldn't be on a bus or other public transport anyway.
JasperHale · 30/11/2021 12:29

The entitled cows should try that on London underground in the rush hours, particularly Jubilee line 😈

TurnUpTurnip · 30/11/2021 12:29

There’s clearly a lot of people who think children shouldn’t have a seat on the bus, I was on the bus yesterday and my son was sitting down when a woman got on and and scowled at him and then stood right by his seat tutting and shaking her head! She clearly wanted him to move and give up his seat now whilst I would be happy for him to give up his seat for someone that needs it there was other empty seats!! She seemed to only want his though

shouldistop · 30/11/2021 12:30

@Confrontayshunme

They wanted physical space and you instructed your child to invade it. You don't know whether they are vulnerable and schoolchildren are the most infectious right now. Not in a pandemic? It would have been fine. Now? You were definitely BU.
If they want physical space then they shouldn't take public transport when there's no social distancing rules in place.
RedWingBoots · 30/11/2021 12:30

@3scape

The old fashioned approach of getting children to stand pre dates women in their 40s! When I was a child in the 70s it was only teens who were expected to stand. Young children were sat on parent/ grand knees mainly though. Shooing away children from taking a seat is ridiculous and entitled behaviour.
I'm in my 40s and this is true.

Now people actually expect a young child to have their own seat and seem surprised if you get the child to co-operate and sit on your lap so they can have the seat.

cadburyegg · 30/11/2021 12:35

YANBU my eldest is 6 and i would be annoyed if he was made to stand

LittleOwl153 · 30/11/2021 12:40

I think the ladies were being ridiculous - but there is alot of fear out there currently.

Personally however I would probably have made one of them move their bags for me - and then sat with the little one on my knee or stood in front of me with my arms wrapped around them. Pathetic to think they are entitled to 2 seats even currently.

Effram · 30/11/2021 12:45

My 3 year old stands on the bus and just holds on to a low down rail and it's fine. Often people then ask if he'd like to sit down on the aisle seat and if so then we take them up (unless he decides he'd prefer to stand!). I can understand people not wanting to share their seats. We stand up to give up a seat for anyone who appears to need it, he has good young legs to stand on!

LittleMysSister · 30/11/2021 12:49

I think now that the distancing regs are no longer in place, they were being ridiculous.

Back when every other seat was out of service, fair enough. But not now.

MintJulia · 30/11/2021 12:49

I'd have sat down in one of the vacant seats and let her sit on my knee. No need for either of you to stand.

ElephantOfRisk · 30/11/2021 12:51

this isn't really a kids in seats issue though really. They didn't want anyone sitting beside them, they wanted a double seat to themselves. I'm in my 50s and from the children should stand when it's busy generation, this doesn't really hold water anymore, the most able bodied should stand. I'm happy to stand if required.

When the bus is half empty, you should all have sat.

ElephantOfRisk · 30/11/2021 12:51

Covid is the new "bag on the seat" method for rude people to get what they want.

AndMatt · 30/11/2021 12:57

Did those women have masks? Grin

I don't think a 6yo gets priority for a seat, but if there were free seats you should/could have all sat.