Way back last year a woman came to work with my team who within days rang me crying that her husband was abusing her and a drunk .
Although I hardly knew her I offered her a place to stay for the night and gave her a key so if she ever felt trapped she had somewhere to go.
We became friends .
During my time on this team It became apparent that a clique was forming and I stayed out of it .
A new line manager took over in July and had a one to one where he told me his impression of me was that I was chaotic and scatty and asked me if I'm menopausal .
The previous manager had described me as the most productive person in the team so I asked him if his observation had any bearing on my work . He said no.
Following this I was under scrutiny for everything from my time keeping to my workload which I documented in writing .
One morning in July i discovered my mother was gravely ill on a ventilator. We have been no contact for 20 years but I rang to ask for a days leave to make my peace and visit .
My immediate managers response was no. She said that it was a disciplined organisation and that they were short staffed and I needed to come in.
I rang my gp and she signed me off for a month .
In that time I had zero contact from work until after 16 days they decided I needed a welfare check.
I did not respond to the message . The following day the bitch manager and my "friend " were sat outside my house . I had several missed calls and I told them I was sick , in bed and did. It want to see them and to go away.
My "friend" had already decided to block me on what's app saying she did not want to get involved and another colleague told me that as soon as I went t off she took my book off my desk with my evidence in and gave it to bitchy manager . I had asked her to put it in my desk .
They sat outside my house and then "friend" began to message my adult daughter on social media which caused her to panic . There was absolutely no reason for this as I had given no cause for concern to anyone at all- they hadn't contacted me and so I hadn't contacted them . When they did my immediate thought was fuck off and I didn't engage other than to say I didn't want a welfare visit.
Fried said that because I hadn't replied to message that they'd panicked and asked if there was anything they could do to which I replied yes - leave me alone and leave the fake concern at works door .
I did not put in an official complaint as I found out while off sick I had got another job which is already interviewed for so I just moved on . I blocked the entire dept on everything.
I met a colleague for coffee last week who intimated that I should not have have blocked this "friend" .
My gut feeling is that I was not unreasonable. I have moved to a new dept and I get along with everyone and I'm happy . It just means I have no friends from work any longer .
I think the old dept saw me as a bit of a doormat because I was happy go lucky and never said no. I got my locks changed btw.
Wabu?