To be really irritated with husband for this?

[user14943608381]

My husband is just not talking my being in pain seriously and it’s fucking driving me mad.

I’m 39 weeks pregnant and have had awful PGP since at least 20 weeks, i can’t turn over in bed, I’m so stiff when I start moving about, i need help getting up, can’t lift legs up high, you know the works. Now I can’t walk for too long as it feels like my hip bones are breaking and he just turns around and says ‘well they aren’t breaking though’, whilst obviously that’s correct, it’s so dismissive of my being in pain. The PGP too is so limiting it’s fucking shit and he keeps on doing impressions of me and it makes me want to murder him.

Now I’ve got quite bad sciatic pain that gives me random pains in my hips like they’re going to give way, i had one today and he nearly pissed himself laughing. Apparently I struck a ‘funny pose’ but it’s categorically not funny because it hurts so much.

This is a man as well that when he’s got a cold… well you’d think it’s his last days on Earth.

I get he’s trying to make light of the situation but I’ve told him approximately one million times it’s not funny and I don’t appreciate it because I’m in pain.

Would anyone else find this exceptionally annoying?

This is my second pregnancy and physically I’ve felt a LOT worse this time around, i had PGP before but it wasn’t this painful and I didn’t have a toddler to entertain. So part of me thinks because I didn’t feel like this before, he doesn’t quite believe me.

Tempting to kick him hard in the shins and see how funny he finds that.

I'd say that he'd be finding it exceptionally life threatening, the idiot.

he keeps on doing impressions of me and it makes me want to murder him

Even the thought of my husband doing this to me makes me want to stick a knife in his eye YANBU. Do you need an alibi?

Speak to your midwife about the pain. Your husband needs a kick in the gonads from a large horse.

@Lifetheuniverseandeverything

Speak to your midwife about the pain. Your husband needs a kick in the gonads from a large horse.

I’ve tried, the care where I am is so poor. I’ve not seen the same person more than once, no named midwife. I was put on aspirin at my booking appointment, was asking since 32 weekswhen do I stop (know it increased bleeding) each midwife took my number and promised to let me know, I even sent chaser text messages and phone calls and nothing. I’ve been asking about this and just been told nothing you can do, get on with it or crutches.

I went to a chiro for it last week, they were full this week but I’m hoping for a cancellation

Try a TENS machine for the sciatica op. Worked wonders for me. Even managed camping at 32 weeks!!

@JesusIsAnyNameFree

he keeps on doing impressions of me and it makes me want to murder him

Even the thought of my husband doing this to me makes me want to stick a knife in his eye YANBU. Do you need an alibi?

Yes please!

Although at this point I’d gladly take the life sentence, in fact I think a judge and jury would take mercy on me as they’d know the killing was just.

I hope to god he’s doing the majority of care for your older child, whilst he’s in the house

Happy to provide an alibi.

he keeps on doing impressions of me and it makes me want to murder him

This would give me the rage and the ick. It's so completely juvenile. Twat.

@GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing

I hope to god he’s doing the majority of care for your older child, whilst he’s in the house

I’m on mat leave now, DD 2 is in nursery 3 days but I’m doing the majority the other 2 whilst he’s still working. On the weekend though all heavy lifting is down to chuckles

I could never stay married to someone so callous. This has been evident before, surely. An attitude like this doesn't just come out of nowhere.

Look him square in the eye.
Ask why does he find the person he is supposed to love being in extreme pain amusing? Is it because he is a silly little boy who cannot possibly cope with looking after himself, his home and his toddler if his DW is incapacitated?

Is this the tip of an iceberg?

I'd be giving it to him both barrels, and letting him know in no uncertain terms that I will remember this. FOREVER. When he is in pain and/or poorly, I shall piss myself laughing at his suffering, and do absolutely nothing that indicates sympathy or empathy for his plight. E.g. Oh, you have a sniffle? Poor fucking baby. Hurl a box of tissues at him, and if they hit him in the head, so be it. .

Do you have a good relationship with your mum/a sister/close friend who you could call crying about it while he can hear the call, and who would offer to help or take you in for a bit? I realise this is passive aggressive maybe but if you’ve said it right to his face and he still won’t stop he needs to realise this is real.

Now I’ve got quite bad sciatic pain that gives me random pains in my hips like they’re going to give way, i had one today and he nearly pissed himself laughing. Apparently I struck a ‘funny pose’ but it’s categorically not funny because it hurts so much.

Your labour will be hell if he is your birth partner.

@Aquamarine1029

I could never stay married to someone so callous. This has been evident before, surely. An attitude like this doesn't just come out of nowhere.

It doesn’t come just out of nowhere it’s his way of trying to lighten things up, you know if I do something funny he’ll take the mick out of me or if we’re being huffy with each other- he does it to lighten the tone. Sometimes it works but for Christ sake man, read the room! Being huffy over loading the dishwasher or spilling tea isn’t the same as someone wincing in pain… I swear, I can feel my BP rising as I type

Stuff like this really bothers me. What an absolute cunt. How can a man not only not care that his partner is carrying his child and it is hurting her, but he actively mocks her for it. It’s so unbelievably shit.

When I was pregnant and uncomfortable, my husband did everything in his power to look after me, it seemed to prompt a protectiveness I’d not see before.
The way your partner is behaving is truly awful.

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

Now I’ve got quite bad sciatic pain that gives me random pains in my hips like they’re going to give way, i had one today and he nearly pissed himself laughing. Apparently I struck a ‘funny pose’ but it’s categorically not funny because it hurts so much.

Your labour will be hell if he is your birth partner.

My first labour was an induction no less, he actually wasn’t a c u next Tuesday then. Although when I had pethedine for the pain and was talking his ear off he was on his phone (which now makes me a bit irrationally angry).

He’s not by birth partner though, we have no childcare so we’ve hired a doula xx

This is what I mean @Tonyschoco it should be massages, cups of tea and general pampering. I hope he falls down a well

Your husband needs a kick in the goolies.

Congratulations on your pregnancy and I hope all goes well and you feel better soon.

Bloody hell. He's supposed to be on your side. Probably a good job he's not your birth partner. Is he usually such an arse?

He’s not by birth partner though, we have no childcare so we’ve hired a doula xx

Very glad to hear this. He isn’t an appropriate person to be supportive when you are vulnerable in pain. Something to think about as you age…

In the meantime, when you’re in pain and he starts his crap, cry. Drive it home to him just how much pain youre in. If he laughs or tired to dismiss you when you are crying, you’ve a big decision to make.

That's so sadistic and weird. Sorry OP but he sounds like a massive arsehole to be honest

Does he know that if he'd done the same with your first, there wouldn't have been a second?

Not even an inch of this is endearing and I'd be furious with him.