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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask neighbour to move appliance because of noise?

63 replies

Badvibrations · 08/11/2021 15:33

NC for this

I live in a terrace. My neighbours on one side are very nice and I really like them. I really don't want to fall out or cause any tension.

But they have an appliance which vibrates through the walls and drives me nuts.

The rest of my family don't mind it.

I have a problem with noise and vibration, suspected ADHD (waiting for assessment) so I know I'm not 'normal'

Am I being unreasonable to ask them to try moving it away from the wall?

YABU: suck it up, you live in a terrace
YANBU: no harm in asking

OP posts:
minipie · 08/11/2021 15:35

Absolutely no harm in asking. But if it’s something like a washing machine and is built into the kitchen they probably won’t have much option to move it. You could ask them to wedge a foam/rubber pad behind it - especially if you offer to buy the pad?

AryaStarkWolf · 08/11/2021 15:36

How often is the appliance on everyday? Also, is it small enough that they would even have to option of moving it?

Original poster
Badvibrations · 08/11/2021 15:38

Thanks for the replies

It's on all day every day they are home. I think it's a dehumidifier but I'm not sure...

They really are great neighbours and I don't want to upset them Blush

OP posts:
DeepaBeesKit · 08/11/2021 15:46

You could ask very carefully but if they can't move it easily you have no choice but to suck it up, you live in a terrace

Merryoldgoat · 08/11/2021 15:48

I’d be happy for you to ask and would make the changes I could to help if feasible.

MangoBiscuit · 08/11/2021 15:50

I would have no ill feelings if one of my neighbours made a request like this. I would move it if I could, or do what I could to lessen the impact.

As long as you don't act like a jerk about it (which I think is unlikely) then there's no harm in asking.

Original poster
Badvibrations · 08/11/2021 15:52

@Merryoldgoat

I’d be happy for you to ask and would make the changes I could to help if feasible.
Thank you that's reassuring

I know if they can't do anything about it I'll just have to live with it.

Might try hypnosis.... I hate that it affects me so much. In some ways it's worse that it chugs chugs chugs, cuts off for a few seconds then chugs up again. All day long!!!!

And I can't even escape right now as I'm self isolating Confused

OP posts:
minipie · 08/11/2021 15:54

I also wouldn’t mind at all if a neighbour asked. They may have no idea it causes you an issue and perhaps could easily move it. You’ll never know unless you ask (politely obvs).

It would drive me mad too

AryaStarkWolf · 08/11/2021 15:55

@Badvibrations

Thanks for the replies

It's on all day every day they are home. I think it's a dehumidifier but I'm not sure...

They really are great neighbours and I don't want to upset them Blush

If it's a dehumidifier it should be easy enough to move to another side of the room, I would ask them
5zeds · 08/11/2021 15:56

What IS it???

Original poster
Badvibrations · 08/11/2021 15:56

@minipie

I also wouldn’t mind at all if a neighbour asked. They may have no idea it causes you an issue and perhaps could easily move it. You’ll never know unless you ask (politely obvs).

It would drive me mad too

Thank you, I will ask in the nicest way possible!

I'm just so worried I'll offend them or come off looking a bit bonkers.

Mind you I think the ship has sailed on the last one...

OP posts:
Pinkchocolate · 08/11/2021 15:58

If it’s easily moved I wouldn’t mind if it was my neighbour. YANBU to ask.

MilduraS · 08/11/2021 15:58

Always worth asking. I wouldn't have a clue what noises my neighbour can hear so I don't know if there's a problem.

Original poster
Badvibrations · 08/11/2021 15:59

@5zeds

What IS it???
I don't know but I think it's a dehumidifier as they mentioned they have one. And it's on all day so not a washing machine/tumble dryer/dishwasher. It's too loud to be a fridge and it wasn't on when they were away (bliss) so I doubt it's something that needs to be on when they're not in.
OP posts:
Voord · 08/11/2021 15:59

It wouldn’t bother me if a neighbour asked but in most kitchens, even big ones, the scope to move appliances around is pretty limited.

Skeumorph · 08/11/2021 16:00

I would totally move it if I was able to and wouldn't be offended at all!

trevthecat · 08/11/2021 16:02

I would ask. If my neighbour asked I would try to accommodate

Original poster
Badvibrations · 08/11/2021 16:03

Thanks you lovely lot, you have given me the courage to ask!!

OP posts:
Irishfarmer · 08/11/2021 16:07

Def ask. I lived in Australia for a bit, and didn't realise my A.C. leaked onto the balcony of the flat below me. My below neighbour (who I hadn't meet/even recognised) knocked one evening and said about a leak coming for my balcony down onto hers. I didn't even know an A.C. could leak. I ended up putting a bucket under where the tube came out of the wall, and emptied as needed, I did also tell my landlord, he said he'd get someone to call and look at it but didn't.

I 100% did not mind that my neighbor asked as she was friendly and didn't come at me all like I was doing it to deliberately annoy her.

missverstaendnis · 08/11/2021 16:08

seriously, NO. so your neighbour is not allowed to do laundry unless you approve of it? Buy yourself a detached house then or live with it, comes with normal life

Irishfarmer · 08/11/2021 16:09

btw I'm really surprised at how many people said YABU!! You asked, should you ask her, not demand she moves it, if she cant.

TotallySuper · 08/11/2021 16:10

I voted YABU as really its your issue as you mentioned however I think if you do ask them to move it you should explain why. I would absolutely do my best to move an appliance based on your explanation of why, but if you just randomly asked and said it was noisy I'd be less convinced at putting myself out IFSWIM.

Mumteedum · 08/11/2021 16:11

They are noisy if that's what it is. I know next door had something similar on loads a long while ago and it's like once you tune in, you can't tune it out and it drove me mad too. It may be on hard floors so it's worse than if on carpet or something. Maybe they could stand it on something or use a timer function. Seems a bit much for it to be going all the time.

Original poster
Badvibrations · 08/11/2021 16:14

@missverstaendnis

seriously, NO. so your neighbour is not allowed to do laundry unless you approve of it? Buy yourself a detached house then or live with it, comes with normal life
Um, that's not what I'm saying

I'm asking how you would feel about a neighbour asking very nicely and respectfully if you would consider trying something that would make very little difference to you but would make a huge difference to me all while acknowledging that it may not be possible...

Show me where I suggested banning my neighbour from doing laundry Grin ?

OP posts:
Chikapu · 08/11/2021 16:16

@missverstaendnis

seriously, NO. so your neighbour is not allowed to do laundry unless you approve of it? Buy yourself a detached house then or live with it, comes with normal life
What does doing laundry have to do with anything? It's already been stated it's not a washing machine or dryer.