Story repeaters

[NigellaSeed]

DP always repeats the same things. Long, extensive critiques of why a film or TV show was in his opinion fantastic or terrible. Its thoughtful and sometimes interesting (the first time you hear it) but it's looong. We been together years so it's part and parcel that I hear the same stories or opinions over and over.

But the thing is, he tells it all to his parents, and they're his captive audience, as if they've never heard it before.. But hes already told them like 6 months ago. And then the year before that too. It starts the exact same discussion with no new ideas. I find it so dull and usually kills the night for me.

I'm not the worlds best dinner guest but I can remember what I've said to someone and what they've already told me. All three of them are extremely bright and have so many interests (nature, tech, travel etc etc) but sometimes I just think they're so boring.

I try and steer things into a new direction but sometimes I can't get a word in.

Yabu - it's normal to have the same conversation over and over, just smile and look like you're having a good time

Yanbu - you can go to bed early and complain to wise MNtters

My DH does this but luckily dor us, MiL does it too and since I (and dcs) pointed this out to him he's improved a lot!

When MiL starts on another round of the same anecdote (or one of her 'why I am/was right and everyone else is/was wrong diatribes, naughty dh has been known to pick up his phone leaving me on my own to smile and nod ...

Haha yeah my dsis does the speeding up when you are trying to go or even starting a new story when I am trying go/get off the phone thing. Its like a fundamental drive for some people, to get the talk miles into other people's ears....

I know I have a tendency to do this, dyslexia memory issues so I start any story with Just stop me if I've told you this before and the shut up
Had it all my life, it's not an age thing.

My husband does this. I've been in a room with him and his dad monologuing at each other at the same time each with an oft repeated tale. My god did I need a drink.

I have to consider what I say so to not unintentionally utter a trigger word.

My MIL, DP and DD all do this. It’s a family trait and very annoying.

With DP and DD, I just tell them I already know. I try to be more diplomatic with MIL but after 17 years of hearing the same stories, I’m running out of patience. Sometimes I hear the same thing a few times within an hour . There’s a sticky toffee pudding story we hear every time we have ordered dessert in all those years.

[quote SweetMaryHell]@Mookie81

😂 bless her - there’s the story of how our Labrador ran after the milk man around 35 years ago

The story of how her sister called her fatty because she wouldn’t let her put her records on (around 60 years ago)

The story of how she slapped a yogurt lid on my dads arm (around 40 years ago - must admit I do find this one amusing)

And my personal favourite which I don’t mind her repeating … the time she was drunk on Malibu and deliberately batted a tray of sausage rolls out of my uncles hands at an army do. She was made to help clean up the mess 😂[/quote]
The sausage roll one deserves repeated tellings!

@SweetMaryHell

My mum does this and always has. The thing is as she’s never worked and doesn’t socialise her stories tend to be very mundane events that most people just wouldn’t remember. Here are a few of her favourites:

A large spider walked across her living room floor around 10 years ago. Step sister threw a catalogue at it. It missed.

My uncle said he couldn’t find a decent pillow anywhere (around 15 years ago).

About 7 years ago my mum got on a bus and the driver dropped his change down the side of his chair. He responded with the comment “it’s not my day today”.

These stories are drawn out with acting and “comical” impressions but the story remains the same and are told at least once a month,?for years and years …

These narratives are straight out of an Alan Bennett story.

Superb.

@OliviaKeeling the not uttering a 'trigger word' made me laugh out loud!

My inlaws are terrible for this. My 'favourite' is my FIL who asked a scientific question once as a sort of 'isn't it strange that' - and I explained that no it's not strange - here's why it's like that. He took that answer and now the number of times he's held court explaining to me at patronising length this wonderful logic that 'not many people understand' but he does. The first time I did an internal eye roll, the 29th and 30th..... Grrrr.

MIL has a million as well. I always cringe worrying she's going to realise half way through that she's already told me (5,508 times) a given anecdote and then it will be embarrassing for all involved, but nope, yet to happen a single time yet.

But do any of them tell the same 20 minute story word for word that they have told a hundred times before, get the the end finally..
..and repeat the whole thing word for word from the start again? 🙉 ( Because they have obviously been so entertaining, they are giving us an encore free gratis and for 'nowt )

My family member does this - not a parent and not age related, as this is what they have always done..

It's excruciating.

I'm not the worlds best dinner guest but I can remember what I've said to someone and what they've already told me.

I can as well but DH can't and at least one of our children is the same - very poor episodic memory. MIL is terrible as she has a very poor episodic memory but her and her brother fill in the blanks to them with new stuff - so you can have been at event and not recognise it al all - and if your not careful they retell their vesiors so much it and add to it more and more it becomes the accepted version even if it clearly batshit.

A quick google tells me poor epidosic memory is asociated with conditions like Alzheimer's Disease and Parkinson's Disease which tend to occur in higher numbers in older people and can be missed for years before they are diagnosed.

I do wonder if there's another side to it that FIL and DDAd have where they start on long ramblinsg stories - that everyone's heard before- that you wonder if they care there's an audience as they can't seriously beliveve anyone would be interested - with FIL meals he's eaten before I was even born - why assume an interest in such an obscure subject let alone keep coming back to it again and again.

What's he like at home with you? Do you entertain the endless boring rants?

I usually say "Stop me if I've told you this before." I speak with a lot of people and I can't remember who I've told what to.
If they don't speak up then it's their look out

My mum starts her repeated tales with "Stop me if I've told you before," & then carries on with the full stroy when it's pointed out that she's told us before...

She also recounts all conversations absolutely verbatim which drives me nuts.

"So I said Jim you'll have to get that shelf fixed and he said Yes Ann I'll get someone round and I said That's good and he said Thanks for telling me about it Ann and I said No problem Jim, anytime"

Instead of "I told Jim his shelf is broken - he's getting it fixed"

One of my extended in-laws does this… I remember the second time we had dinner with them, and he started re-telling a story - I was mortified because he was really animated about telling this story, and I was thinking “oh no, at what point do I interrupt and tell him he’s already told me this”

Now many years later he has told it many times. I have realised the expected behaviour is to just listen and laugh at the punchlines again.

DP does this all the time and always has since I’ve known him (I met him when he was 30). It’s got to the point where me and the kids take the piss out of him and groan and he knows full well he’s telling a story we’ve already heard a million times. BUT HE CARRIES ON TELLING IT ANYWAY.

His mum is exactly the same.

Oh lord MIL has three no, four main topics she does this with:

1. How, even though she is so small and teeny, used to have to do all the work in the house as a kid.

2. The wonderful mother she is/was - in particular to DH, and how DHs dad was never there.

3. How amazing she was as a secretary for a ''Blue Chip Company'' with typing skills people could scarcely believe and how her boss couldn't function through a day without her.

4. How very small and teeny she is.

I know for a fact no.2 is a load of bollocks.

Knowing a bit about timelines and other circ.s i'm pretty sure that no.3 is bollocks as well at best a huge exaggeration.

Therefore i'm highly sus about the truth of no.1.

and no.4 ..... yes. we get it. you're short. I mean ??