Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Story repeaters

91 replies

NigellaSeed · 26/10/2021 23:01

DP always repeats the same things. Long, extensive critiques of why a film or TV show was in his opinion fantastic or terrible. Its thoughtful and sometimes interesting (the first time you hear it) but it's looong. We been together years so it's part and parcel that I hear the same stories or opinions over and over.

But the thing is, he tells it all to his parents, and they're his captive audience, as if they've never heard it before.. But hes already told them like 6 months ago. And then the year before that too. It starts the exact same discussion with no new ideas. I find it so dull and usually kills the night for me.

I'm not the worlds best dinner guest but I can remember what I've said to someone and what they've already told me. All three of them are extremely bright and have so many interests (nature, tech, travel etc etc) but sometimes I just think they're so boring.

I try and steer things into a new direction but sometimes I can't get a word in.

Yabu - it's normal to have the same conversation over and over, just smile and look like you're having a good time

Yanbu - you can go to bed early and complain to wise MNtters

OP posts:
drumandhake · 27/10/2021 04:23

I do think some people have no memory for what they have heard themselves say before. I'm mortified if I am gently reminded that I have told someone something already. I seem to notice some people don't seem to find this embarrassing and will just sort of hit you with stories until they get to one you seem moderately interested in. Former work colleague and her long stories about her DW's various allergies Halloween Hmm

GillBiggeloesHair · 27/10/2021 06:01

My Mum does this. God it's so tedious.
If I gently remind her she gets huffy.

Add to this the excruciatingly boring brain download she does about the neighbours and people I don't know plus the word for word convos she has had and it's a full house.

Fdksyihfd · 27/10/2021 06:04

My mil is like this and she tells it’s like she’s never told me before but I’ve heard some of these things about 10 times by now.

ZenNudist · 27/10/2021 06:05

My dad does this but assume it is memory problems like he doesn't know he's told us over and over. He has been doing it since he was young so not just an age thing.

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 27/10/2021 06:09

I have a friend who brings up the same hilarious things that happened when we all lived together as students, as in 'oh my god remember when this happened hahaha wasn't it funny' but we've already reminisced about how funny it was once this year, and several times in the last ten years too...
my boyfriend repeats stories but I think he's got some short term memory loss from doing drugs as a youngster Confused

AlphabetAerobics · 27/10/2021 06:13

I’m unable to hide the tedium from my face - I visibly squirm, fidget and even cry.

The only option is divorce (as a previous poster mentioned) or faking your own death.

Confusedbear91 · 27/10/2021 06:22

Oh my GOD everyone from work does this! The same stories of 'the good old days' over and over! We're teachers, so not old or memory issues! FIL also does this, I think they just genuinely get wrapped up in their story, even if you say to them that you've heard it before. Aaaagh!

BillyAndTheSillies · 27/10/2021 06:24

My MIL does this constantly. And similarly to lots of PP's - there's no point stopping her because she ignores anything outside of her own voice. I used to interrupt but realised it's pointless. Now I just smile and let her finish knowing that it'll be over sooner if I do that.
Her beloved sons are the only ones who can break the spell. If they interrupt her she'll stop. But no one else has that magic power.

Heathofhares · 27/10/2021 06:26

Its a thing in my family too. But we all do it, I think its kind of a conversational comfort blanket. It often starts with “you know the time when...”

But yes I have to be careful not to do it in wider company... and it drives DH nuts!

AnotherMansCause · 27/10/2021 06:30

My own parents, DH, & MIL do this too OP. Not my FIL strangely, it's one of his redeeming qualities... I hope to God I don't!

CoalCraft · 27/10/2021 06:33

Gosh, I've come across people like this (only a few, thankfully) and I'm afraid I find it utterly unbearable. Know way I could live with them.

I find it so arrogant and self-absorbed. It's bad enough thinking I'd want to listen to your long-winded, pretentious waffle the first time (I don't) but to hear it multiple times!? Awful.

CoalCraft · 27/10/2021 06:33

Er.... NO way, that should be

HomeSliceKnowsBest · 27/10/2021 06:40

DF does this. He barely goes out, has limited human interactions and lives on old glories. It is really rather sad when you realise this.
Maybe get your DH a -top secret- hobby or two to broaden his interests?

Unescorted · 27/10/2021 06:53

What I don't understand is why my mum doesn't tell me the nice stories in life. Her repeated tales are always nasty gossip, put downs and lists of the things that make my brothers much better children than me.

thelegohooverer · 27/10/2021 07:21

I think I’ll get there soon - between repeating the same songs, rhymes and stories for toddlers thousands of times, enduring years of the Minecraft Monologues and listening to our dps recite their stories over and over and over again, I’m sure I’m sustaining long term brain dysfunction.

Sometimes I find it hard to make myself listen when I need to (like asking for directions) because I’m so used to zoning out.

God help us when I start repeating old stories because I’ve nothing interesting to tell - it will just be a combination of The Tiger that Came to Tea on repeat interspersed with 101 facts about Pokemon.

TreesoftheField · 27/10/2021 07:29

Both me and my husband do this, but it mortifies me!! We love to catch each other out and sarcastically finish the story.

SweetMaryHell · 27/10/2021 07:34

My mum does this and always has. The thing is as she’s never worked and doesn’t socialise her stories tend to be very mundane events that most people just wouldn’t remember. Here are a few of her favourites:

A large spider walked across her living room floor around 10 years ago. Step sister threw a catalogue at it. It missed.

My uncle said he couldn’t find a decent pillow anywhere (around 15 years ago).

About 7 years ago my mum got on a bus and the driver dropped his change down the side of his chair. He responded with the comment “it’s not my day today”.

These stories are drawn out with acting and “comical” impressions but the story remains the same and are told at least once a month,?for years and years …

MacNTosh · 27/10/2021 07:38

My Step Father has always done this, right back from when he was in his 40s. One of his stories is about the time my longwinded Aunt said someone’s eyes had glazed over while she was talking and he said, perhaps your were boring them! Oh the irony.

Seriously though, is smile and nod the only way forward?

jb7445 · 27/10/2021 07:40

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

blink18two · 27/10/2021 07:43

My PILs and BIL/SIL do this.

Fucking tedious.

blink18two · 27/10/2021 07:46

Currently I'm hearing all the same pregnancy stories from MIL that I heard multiple times the first time I was pregnant.

Yes, I know you 'didn't even want to try breastfeeding'. Really fucking hate this part of the conversation considering I tried my hardest and never really managed it.

Original poster
NigellaSeed · 27/10/2021 08:55

@SweetMaryHell

My mum does this and always has. The thing is as she’s never worked and doesn’t socialise her stories tend to be very mundane events that most people just wouldn’t remember. Here are a few of her favourites:

A large spider walked across her living room floor around 10 years ago. Step sister threw a catalogue at it. It missed.

My uncle said he couldn’t find a decent pillow anywhere (around 15 years ago).

About 7 years ago my mum got on a bus and the driver dropped his change down the side of his chair. He responded with the comment “it’s not my day today”.

These stories are drawn out with acting and “comical” impressions but the story remains the same and are told at least once a month,?for years and years …

That made me a little sad. It reminds me of my mum, she doesn't repeat stories but she also had no social life and her stories are of what someone said at Asda or her neighbours daughters son. :(
OP posts:
Original poster
NigellaSeed · 27/10/2021 09:02

@jg7445 yes luckily I can get away with jokily snapping "heard it" if he tries to give me a lecture on why this or that is a masterpiece.

From reading all your comments, I'm starting to wonder if his parents are actually just amazing at the smiling and nodding routine. It seems easier to believe than the three of them are just that forgetful.

I guess this is my life. Mentally checking out and let them get on with it Halloween Grin

OP posts:
Notesandmemos · 27/10/2021 09:37

Like a PP we've been treated to PIL's never-changing accounts of their local supermarkets so often they have become part of our family 'in joke' language. If anyone starts repeating themselves in a tedious manner someone will alert them with ' Is there a Lidl near you?'.

Mumoftwoinprimary · 27/10/2021 09:57

“You’ve told your mum and dad this already Fred. Why don’t you tell them about….”

And then insert something that won’t make you want to eat your own eardrums.