MIL has invited her mother to our house for christmas (inc. overnight stay) and only told me this afternoon

[ComeOVenReadyturkey]

SO?

Champagne and valium from the moment the dcs are awake. And sympathies, especially cos it sounds like yr MIL won't understand the concept of brownie points ...

Blow up beds are fine, dd was going to be sleeping on one in ds's room, the trouble is ds (3 next week) isn't in a bed yet. Fortunately we have just got one but it is currently in dd's room. So this weekend we now have to move it into his room, dismantle the cot and get him used to sleeping in a bed. Plus dh's computer, shredder etc are in the office and ds has a nack of buggering up such equipment, so dh will have to take it all out and store it somewhere else for the night.

As I said previously we originally believed she would be abroad for christmas, but in any case she lives with her other daughter who is hosting christmas for other members of the family and her husband's family so it isn't a poor little old lady sitting alone in her home on christmas at all.

Blimey.
Is she nice? Or does her daughter take after her?

She's not bad, a bit set in her ways and hard work but a breeze compared to her daughter.

BTW, I agree with the others that your DH should tell them not to bring the dogs.

i'd be most peed off by the dogs, but then I'm lucky as my crazy il's will never come over because of their cats

I would of course say that you should tell her not to bring the dogs, but I suspect that would not be wholly successful.

If your DH did bite the bullet, how do you think she would react?

She would get all tearful and say that she couldn't put them in kennels because they would hate it etc etc. These dogs are from Battersea and she reckons kenneling them would bring back traumatic memories .

It gets better - DH has just rung me to say she called him at work to say she felt bad about this whole saga so to make up for it she and fil will take the children out on boxing day to give us a break. OK in theory sounds good, however the reality of it is this - grandmother will be with us for the day as she couldn't cope with a day of the children after christmas day so have to entertain her and my parents (who don't know her), also it means all 3 of them will have to stay boxing day night, so the meal I have prepared and frozen for that night isn't enough for 3 extra mouths so will have to redo. This isn't exactly my idea of a break!!! DH of course has agreed to it. This is her cunning strategy, corner dh at work where he is currently ridiculously busy so she catches him off gaurd .

Why can't the grandmother stay with other daughter and family?

Sounds like grandmother has actually been invited by her daughter to her granddaughter's house. Not on. You don't invite some one to some one else's house.
Any inviting to COV's house should be done by COV or her dh.

Aaaaahhh, MIL out of control!

Sorry if being dim - why do they therefore have to stay the night?

I definitely don't allow canine visitors to my house - whoever they belong to!

Get DH to call her back - or better still e-mail FIL and say no thank you to the Boxing Day offer if it doesn't suit you.

And can the dogs at least sleep in the car if that helps? We always insist, esp. if dog dogs, IYSWIM, as otherwise they lift legs on best furniture, try to hump vicar's leg, etc.

And agree with Budaful - I think a call to dh saying thank you for kind offer on boxing day, but actually doesn't suit.

I would insist the dogs have to stay elsewhere. Is there anyway your mil's granny can stay in the study?

I think you are reasonable to be cross, but there is little you can do about it really apart from hit the gin early.

Dogs in the car, not a chance, they sleep in the room with ILs. They howl all night otherwise. We usually give up our bedroom for them but there is no well on eaarth I am having the dogs in there so ILs have to sleep on the sofa bed in the playroom, especially as the dogs often need to go out to wee during the night and our bedroom is on the 4th floor so would disturb everyone (the playroom has french doors opening onto the garden).

They have to stay boxing day night because they won't do the drive back in the dark.

Gran can't stay in the study as she needs a proper bed.

Doubt FIL knows anything about the boxing day offer tbh.

It makes me so mad the way she has no respect for me. Her daughter's partner of only a year she treats like the best thing since sliced bread, but me her son's wife who he has been with for 16 years and bore her 2 grandchildren she treats like sh*t .

DH is refusing to retract his acceptance of the boxing day outing, he says he can't face the hassle/stress etc.

I hesitate to mention this, as I fear it may just wind you up some more, but having had elderly rellies from SA staying with parents recently, is there going to be room in the GM's bedroom for a chair?

My ageing uncle was most put out to find that there was no chair in his bedroom 'all bedrooms in SA have chairs in them!' so my mum was forced to lug a dining room chair upstairs for him so that he could sit there if so desired (my dad too frail to do it, her not much better - grr!)

Fortunately ds's room (where she will be staying) has a rocker in it from when I used to do night feeds. I was planning on moving it into the playroom next weekend when we have to dismantle the cot and put in a bed but think just to be on the safe side I will leave it. Thanks for the tip lovecat

DS doesn't sleep when he is in our bed, just uses it as a trampoline all night, or goes and plays "lifts" in our shower, so we wouldn't get much sleep. I don't cope well with lack of sleep, so would never get through christmas if he was in with us.