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AIBU?

Not sure whether portrait is a joke or not

177 replies

CallMeAChopper · 16/10/2021 08:13

My friend is a hobby artist and does portraits for £30 each. She’s good at what she does but a) admits that there are some people sfe just can’t draw and b) has a dark sense of humour and messes around sometimes

My daughter is 2 years old and when you ask her to smile she bares all teeth and looks angry, it’s very funny but as a result all of her photos look like she’s growling at the camera. I asked my friend if she would do a portrait of me and DD as a Christmas present to my mum. Obviously I’m paying her.

She kept sending me updates but only of “my” part, all the photos had DD either covered up or cut off the photo. Anyway she’s now sent me the finished full version and asked whether I’m happy with it. It’s bloody hideous! She’s done a spot on version of me but DD looks like the girl from the exorcist! I know she was doing her growl face on the photo but the drawing seems to have exaggerated it and made her look really grotesque - I mean it literally looks like the cover of a horror movie.

Problem is I don’t know whether she’s joking or not!! If I laugh and tell her “good joke” and she didn’t do it on purpose it’s going to really upset her! But I can’t accept it like it is. I literally gasped when I saw it and then burst out laughing.

How on earth do I find out whether she’s joking or not without upsetting her if she isn’t?

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

459 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
23%
You are NOT being unreasonable
77%
Jumpingintochristmas · 16/10/2021 09:48

I couldn’t be arsed using an artist who messes around and ‘jokes’. Definitely not my sense of humour.

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Olivegreenstrawberries · 16/10/2021 09:49

I think it will be a joke

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MRex · 16/10/2021 09:54

If I had a picture of DS growling, I'd think it was funny, in your DD's case a cute reminder of the time when a growl face was the smile pose. Ideally I'd want a pair with one of him having a cute smile and me the monster, then put them next to each other. The only reason not to see it as a joke is if the growl isn't exaggerated really but just a quirk.
It's £30, you aren't commissioning a piece of Fine Art, could you try to just see the humour in it and get another to pair up.

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dworky · 16/10/2021 09:54

I would choose to see that as a joke.

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Lalliella · 16/10/2021 09:58

Given her form, it’s got to be a joke. I hope! If not, can you cut it in two and just keep your part?

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category12 · 16/10/2021 10:07

I think she's having you on, as she was deliberately covering that part in the progress pictures.

Go back to her and say what a pp suggested about "now I see why you were hiding the other half in the progress pics!!"

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JesusInTheCabbageVan · 16/10/2021 10:09

Could you trace it and post the traced version on here? Grin

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Crinkle77 · 16/10/2021 10:14

This is why you should never ask friends to do jobs. However if you know she has form for dark humour perhaps you should have been more specific about what you wanted.

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Holskey · 16/10/2021 10:19

I'd pay her again for another version and be clearer in your expectations. 60 is still very cheap if you're happy with the outcome.

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DoesHePlayTheFiddle · 16/10/2021 10:19

She means it.
Pay her.
Destroy it.
Forget.
I'd forget her, too.

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2bazookas · 16/10/2021 10:21

I think ypu have to say something like "I'm sorry, but DD's part is the exact look I didn't want and I just can't accept it."

Surely you talked to her about "not the growl-face" before she started?

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Enterifyoudare · 16/10/2021 10:23

Why on earth did you get her to do the picture in the first place if you know she's admitted to painting them whilst drunk?

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LunaAndHerMoonDragons · 16/10/2021 10:23

@Pedalpushers

I doubt she's done a portrait as a joke intending to redo it, so you'll just have to say the daughter growling wasn't what you were after and does she mind doing a more smiley one.

I think this is a good way to handle it.
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Marcipex · 16/10/2021 10:26

As she covered up all the preview parts of your daughter, she’s definitely doing it to tease.
Why else would she have done that?

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ChargingBuck · 16/10/2021 10:26

Is it this bad, OP?

Not sure whether portrait is a joke or not
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Chamomileteaplease · 16/10/2021 10:29

Well personally I think the text you sent was awful! It was dishonest, unclear and indirect.

I would have been clear about my feelings and clear about what I wanted done ie

Thank you so much for the portrait Celia, but whilst I think you have captured my likeness beautifully, I would really rather Clara was smiling rather than doing her usual growl. Would it be possible for you to redo her face please? xxxxxxx

Not rude, just clear.

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TatianaBis · 16/10/2021 10:30

Not sure what you were expecting for £30.

Just pay your friend if you don’t want to lose her and don’t ask her to paint your DH.

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secretbookcase · 16/10/2021 10:34

@ChargingBuck

Is it this bad, OP?

But that looks exactly like them!
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MrsTulipTattsyrup · 16/10/2021 10:34

@Chamomileteaplease

Well personally I think the text you sent was awful! It was dishonest, unclear and indirect.

I would have been clear about my feelings and clear about what I wanted done ie

Thank you so much for the portrait Celia, but whilst I think you have captured my likeness beautifully, I would really rather Clara was smiling rather than doing her usual growl. Would it be possible for you to redo her face please? xxxxxxx

Not rude, just clear.

As I’ve said above, she can only ‘redo the face’ if that’s what’s in the photos! You can’t just imagineer another expression onto the paper.
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CallMeAChopper · 16/10/2021 10:37

@ChargingBuck

Is it this bad, OP?

Oh it’s much worse than that, she literally looks demonic, scowling eyes, pinpoint pupils, screwed up nose and gaping open mouth with all teeth bared and exaggerated. Funnily enough it’s well drawn, it doesn’t look like it’s just a shit artist, it looks like she’s drawn it deliberately like that to make it as scary as possible
OP posts:
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category12 · 16/10/2021 10:38

It sounds more and more like she's joking, OP.

She covered it, and it's exaggerated.

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ErrolTheDragon · 16/10/2021 10:39

Maybe tell your friend that one will be perfect to keep for scaring off unsuitable boyfriends in the future but you'd really like one that won't have that effect too?Grin

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Joystir59 · 16/10/2021 10:42

You can't commission a portrait for £30! So you can't comment on it.

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Joystir59 · 16/10/2021 10:42

You have paid for one hour's work

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SoupDragon · 16/10/2021 10:49

@Joystir59

You can't commission a portrait for £30! So you can't comment on it.

She paid what the friend charges.
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