Mother or Birthing Parent

[thaigreen]

Which term do you prefer?

YABU Birthing Parent
YANBU Mother

@anunseemlylovefordustin

Mother! If a trans man personally wants to be called a birthing parent, I've no issue with that at all. But the vast majority are mothers and should be described as such.

This

@Buttercup54321

About time this nonsense stopped!!!!!

Yes to this. Goodness knows how though.

What the fuck is a birthing parent

Mothers give birth to babies 👶🏻

@Patapouf

What the fuck is a birthing parent

Mothers give birth to babies 👶🏻

But as has already been pointed out, with a lesbian couple it can make it easier to be clear which mother is actually giving birth.

But as has already been pointed out, with a lesbian couple it can make it easier to be clear which mother is actually giving birth.

I'm this case, birth mother or birthing mother would be a more accurate descriptor.

@TheKeatingFive

But as has already been pointed out, with a lesbian couple it can make it easier to be clear which mother is actually giving birth.

I'm this case, birth mother or birthing mother would be a more accurate descriptor.

Yes. Excellent point.

It is being used to dehumanise women

Except it isn’t.

But the vast majority are mothers and should be described as such.

Which they are, and nobody is suggesting that will change.

@DontWannaBeObamasElf

I prefer mother but if someone wants to be referred to as something else then that's fine. As long as there's a choice then it doesn't bother me.

I feel the same.

Default is mother. The fast majority of humans that give birth are women and will be the mothers of those children they give birth to.

A very small minority of trans men will give birth m. If they prefer to be referred to as birthing parent then I have no problem with that. Just don't try and change what the majority of the effected want.

@BoredZelda - I think it IS dehumanising to refer to us as birthing bodies or uterus-havers or menstruators, or any of the other terms that have been dreamt up to replace woman and mother.

It reduced us to our body parts, and it ignores the fact that one can become a mother by adoption.

Basically I feel as if the trans rights lobby want to have the terms woman and girl for themselves, and a vocal and nasty minority are forcing this on the majority. It is sickening that the Scottish government MATERNITY policy does not refer even once to mothers.

I prefer the term gestating flesh bag myself.

If some can demand a pronoun, we can demand a noun = mother / woman

Who the hell has clicked on Birthing Parent?!!

I think that MUMS NET is the wrong place for you 😂

But as has already been pointed out, with a lesbian couple it can make it easier to be clear which mother is actually giving birth.

If they are actually giving birth, I’d assume it would be pretty obvious to anyone in the vicinity; no words necessary!

*But as has already been pointed out, with a lesbian couple it can make it easier to be clear which mother is actually giving birth.

If they are actually giving birth, I’d assume it would be pretty obvious to anyone in the vicinity; no words necessary!*

Precisely! Mother and her partner/wife etc. The woman who gave birth is still the baby's mother and should be described as such. This has zero to do with lesbian couples.

Basically I feel as if the trans rights lobby want to have the terms woman and girl for themselves, and a vocal and nasty minority are forcing this on the majority.

So they are "forcing" this language on everyone else (except they aren't) as some sort of bait and switch and then they will do a "tadaaaaaa" we are reclaiming the word woman all for ourselves?

I think it IS dehumanising to refer to us as birthing bodies or uterus-havers or menstruators, or any of the other terms that have been dreamt up to replace woman and mother.

And this has been done directly to you, by a HCP?

I think that MUMS NET is the wrong place for you 😂

What about all the non mums who use it?

Who exactly is a birthing parent if they are not a mother?

@Buttons294749

Let's face it this isn't to make Transmen feel comfortable when going through pregnancy. It's to placate people who will never be mothers by removing that option altogether.

Is transman/NB person wants to be the birthing parent of course we should humour them
. But they are not at the forefront of policy making because they are of the "unimportant" sex

I agree with @Buttons294749 ^

Women are reduced to their bodily functions whilst anyone with a penis can call themselves a woman. Under His Eye.

Mother

@BoredZelda

Basically I feel as if the trans rights lobby want to have the terms woman and girl for themselves, and a vocal and nasty minority are forcing this on the majority.

So they are "forcing" this language on everyone else (except they aren't) as some sort of bait and switch and then they will do a "tadaaaaaa" we are reclaiming the word woman all for ourselves?

I think it IS dehumanising to refer to us as birthing bodies or uterus-havers or menstruators, or any of the other terms that have been dreamt up to replace woman and mother.

And this has been done directly to you, by a HCP?

You seem to have overlooked the last point mae by the poster's comment you replied to re: Scottish Government's maternity policy. Here's an article about it - "Scotland’s civil service deletes ‘mother’ from maternity policy after Stonewall pressure" www.telegraph.co.uk/politics/2021/10/15/scotlands-civil-service-deletes-mother-maternity-policy-stonewall/

It describes how, revealed through a FOI request, Stonewall have lobbied the Scottish Government to remove the word mother from policies relating to maternity.

Uses of words such as 'people with a cervix' "‘Anyone with a cervix’ in cancer screening campaign ‘puts women at risk’ | Scotland | The Times" www.thetimes.co.uk/article/anyone-with-a-cervix-in-cancer-screening-campaign-puts-women-at-risk-bbs776drw and 'menstruators' or worse, 'people who bleed' a"New row over Tampax ‘people who bleed’ tweet | The Independent" www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/tampax-tampons-menstruation-people-who-bleed-jk-rowling-trans-row-b1337497.html?amp and are now routinely used by health services and women's products. The same doesn't happen with services or products for men though. The sole example of men's language being changed to be more 'inclusive' that a previous thread were able to find is Prostate Cancer UK who have a list of those people who have a prostate (but use the word men throughout the rest of their website). Men aren't called ejaculators or sperm producers. It's only women's language that is being changed.

Birth parents is what adopted kids sometimes say to refer to their biological parents.

In any other circumstance the word birth parent is weird really . I am a mum. Not the birth parent of my kid

I didn't give birth to my son so mum is fine do people's kids call them birthing parent ir am I missing something. At the moment I just get bro ir bruv and he is 5

@CecilyP

But as has already been pointed out, with a lesbian couple it can make it easier to be clear which mother is actually giving birth.

If they are actually giving birth, I’d assume it would be pretty obvious to anyone in the vicinity; no words necessary!

You say this, but I was literally in the labour ward with DP and they still kept mixing us up! And in postnatal.

(I'm not sure terminology would have helped, but maybe!).

I get that there are real concerns people have over women's spaces and women's rights, but I find this debate really silly. The literature around pregnancy is full of harmful gendered language - I've seen leaflets that talk about how dads might 'help' with the baby, or imply dads need special cookies to do anything with their own babies. Concentrating on 'birth parents' as language seems to me a kneejerk way of distracting us from actual structural misogyny, which is rather harder to solve.