Men on Mumsnet!

[AnnieSnap]

AIBU to wonder why some men are on Mumsnet? I don’t have strong feelings about it, I’m not anti-men and the posts from men I have come across on here have all been fine, but it just strikes me as odd that these reasonable men would become a part of an obviously women’s forum. Sleazy men, it would make sense, but decent blokes?

I think MN is primarily a women's space. I like that it is. It's not exclusively a women's space, I also like that.

Men are largely welcome if they just join a discussion, no self-proclaimation necessary.

It's impossible to police an online space, short of demanding passport and facial identification, and nobody wants that.

I'd like to think that men are welcome as long as they are her to listen, learn and respectfully contribute to any discussion.

I imagine that MN has been very instructive to quite a few men, I'd like to think that they can come, join and learn.

The absolute dicks are generally banned very quickly, MN modding is pretty responsive to reports.

I do think women's physical spaces are absolutely necessary, online spaces are maybe a good place for men to realise why.

I’ve been here for a while and haven’t got children so I’ve breached the brand ethos too! I found this site when researching the copper coil and I found the advice and information so valuable. I then discovered AIBU and got hooked at how absolutely bizarre that corner of the internet is!

Those who would prefer an exclusive website, could you make your own members based site? You’d have to create a system that checks for cervixes and proof of children of course but you’d eliminate the childless and the penis-havers. We’ll stay here and anonymously debate parking threads and nosey at houses on Rightmove

On a serious note though, you have absolutely no idea who is behind the comments here. People probably lie about their families/jobs/kids all the time and you’re none the wiser.

I'd guess for the same reason I'm on here even though I'm childless. It's interesting, anonymous and full of people with lots more experience than I have.

The male voice is 95% of the rest of the internet.

Is it really? Any evidence of that statistic?

why can't we have just one space, just for women?

What men only space on the internet are you banned from?

@PurpleDaisies

Is it only me that’s a bit depressed that so many posters think predominantly female forum would be improved by adding more men, or that men’s views are seemingly more valued than women’s opinions.

I couldn’t agree more.

I don’t want men to feel unwelcome here, I just don’t think their views are particularly more (or less) valid. It’s ok to have a predominantly female space sometimes!

On a serious note though, you have absolutely no idea who is behind the comments here.

This is true, for example: something like 70% of comments on this thread are from one person changing names a lot.

I should probably find a new hobby.

@Snoozysnoozy

The male voice is 95% of the rest of the internet.

Is it really? Any evidence of that statistic?

why can't we have just one space, just for women?

What men only space on the internet are you banned from?

Men aren’t banned from here anyway, so it’s not relevant.

@PurpleDaisies

I was going to mention PigletJohn who is generous with his time and knowledge.

Yes, but on those threads there are often lots of other posters giving exactly the same advice. They don’t seem to come in for such hero worship though.

I disagree. PigletJohn gives highly specific advice that I'm always amazed at; and seems to appear nearly instantly when requested!

He doesn't just reply to the post but asks for photos, specific manufacturer details etc

I'm a single father, and have been a quiet reader of this forum. I have tried to contribute when able and appropriate, as a way of saying thank you for all the useful advice and tips to have gained from others facing similar challenges (with children, nasty divorce, and legal matters).

The mostly positive replies on this string are really appreciated. I am content to not seek advice from you about my hairy nipples, nor read about female only issues.

PigletJohn is a very helpful MNetter who assisted me when I had a catastrophic plumbing problem. There were other posters castigating me for not being able to solve it myself whilst giving no practical advice. I presume those posters just wanted to rubbish me for 'not learning man-skills' whilst being completely deficient in said skills.

I imagine PigletJohn does get a warm and fuzzy feeling of validation by sharing his knowledge with a predominantly female site. However, once he's shared that knowledge, I have that knowledge too!

There are multitudinous plumbers out there that would charge you over the odds for your minor plumbing conundrum. PigletJohn is giving his knowledge for free and his name is known so people call for him.

The incremental gain is positive, it's largely irrelevant what PigletJohn's motivation

is!

My dad raised me and my brothers, he was a mum and a dad. I think he would have a right to look for advice for his children on a 'mum's' site over anywhere else ...

@Manic2Mummy

My dad raised me and my brothers, he was a mum and a dad. I think he would have a right to look for advice for his children on a 'mum's' site over anywhere else ...

I'm sure your dad was great but he was a dad. He wasn't a mum and a dad.

I'm raising my children on my own. I'm not a mum and a dad, I'm a mum.

On a totally unrelated note, PigletJohn is bloody awesome.

I have no problem with male posters, and think it’s quite helpful and logical when they start with ‘man here…’

Helpful how? When I’ve seen it it’s largely been irrelevant to the thread.

@TheReluctantPhoenix

Mumsnet is, according to their own strap line, ‘by parents for parents’.

I find it stranger to see non parents on a parenting forum.

ODFOD.

Every week.

Every fucking week.

You don't know who has children or who is a man unless they say so, and even then some people on the interwebs can LIE.

Just because someone hasn't had a kid, doesn't make them unable to discuss things like health, pets, property and the million other things on here.

PigletJohn is brilliant! So helpful and so specific and detailed in his DIY advice.

I think it makes sense that dads would come on here for parenting advice and different parents perspective.

I have no children but I'm always on here, because the majority of topics and threads are not parent (never mind mum) specific. It's basically a genera chat site.

At the end of the day people assume it's the mother who is hard done by. Sometimes women are selfish bitc*es! This site is mumsnet because mainly women are left with the kids and there is a load of help for them. A single dad to 4 kids has nowhere to get advice. My dad was called a peado for looking after his kids after my useless mother pissed off! He has every right to be here but unfortunately some women have issue with it

And no, not more than other female posters, just as a different perspective.

Because women all have the same perspective.

I thought PigletJohn was a woman too. In fact, I remember years ago someone floated the idea it was Sarah Beeney and although I instantly discounted it I always read PigletJohn's posts with Beeny's voice ,

59PurpleDaisies
Because women all have the same perspective.

Erm no they don't ....

@Manic2Mummy

59PurpleDaisies Because women all have the same perspective.

Erm no they don't ....

I know.

Sorry typing quick .... may have got that wrong .... sorry

Most things I post on here having nothing to do with my sex and many have nothing to do with my DS, so I don't see why not!