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AIBU?

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Original poster

Naked toddler in swimming pool showers

338 replies

Noodella18 · 08/10/2021 14:35

I take my 2 year old swimming on Fridays. After the session we take a shower in the communal showers, next to the lockers and by the entrance to the pool. I didn't think twice about stripping off her swimming costume to wash her but the lifeguard told me today that she wasn't allowed to be nude 'because it's a public area' and she had to keep it on. Am I being naive in thinking that a naked two year old is really no big deal?

Yanbu - no harm in a naked 2 year old
Yabu - keep the cossie on

OP posts:
Soubriquet · 08/10/2021 17:19

Yanbu. I always whipped the swimming stuff off the dc before wrapping towels on them as toddlers. It meant that they didn’t get the towel soaking wet before being dried by it

Pythonista · 08/10/2021 17:21

Surely the legal implications are the least of people's issues. Why would you let your child run round on a public beach with nothing on when there is every chance of some cunt taking their photo

Movinghouseatlast · 08/10/2021 17:29

Paedophiles choose their jobs based on wanting to to have contact/look at children. For some of them it is a very very long game waiting for an opportunity.

I worked in safeguarding for a while and saw some men interviewed- their interests, hobbies and careers were all simply because they knew they would have access to children.

There will be people in that pool who are there to look at tiny children.

bythere · 08/10/2021 17:40

@Hmmmm2018 It used to be generally accepted that young children were exempt from the social mores and norms that adults must follow. They were seen as just children so they were regarded as not being able to affect anyone. Besides, the idea that someone could be either embarrassed or turned on by the nudity of a small child was seen as impossible or unthinkable to most people but sadly it can be the case.

Skysblue · 08/10/2021 17:43

Yanbu.

Communal showers work fine for men and boys, who can just move their pants a little and wash. Women - and girls - need to get the chlorine off their vagina asap and communal showers prevent this. I’ve had thrush after swimming because the only shower was communal and I had no way to wash myself properly.

MyPatronusIsACat · 08/10/2021 17:48

@Skysblue

Yanbu.

Communal showers work fine for men and boys, who can just move their pants a little and wash. Women - and girls - need to get the chlorine off their vagina asap and communal showers prevent this. I’ve had thrush after swimming because the only shower was communal and I had no way to wash myself properly.

Wonder how long it will be before someone comes along to say 'Surely you mean VULVA, not VAGINA?!' Shock And 'how can they possibly wash the chlorine off their vagina ???' Hmm Grin

The vulva police always lie in wait on threads like this...... Wink

AnkleDeep · 08/10/2021 17:49

The solution, of course, is to do away with mixed changing areas and have single sex locker rooms.

Maybe mention that next time you are there.

Pythonista · 08/10/2021 17:50

I think it's a shame that these places don't just have cubicles

MintyGreenDream · 08/10/2021 17:54

@Hmmmm2018 yes but if you keep their private parts covered you know for a fact noone untoward can see them

LuluJakey1 · 08/10/2021 17:56

There are some awful, and quite unlikely, sex offenders hanging around swimming pool changing rooms. When I was a teacher, we had two separate instances of teenage boys photographing small boys and other boys naked in changing rooms at the local pool using mobile phones.
They were both charged and cautioned. One was shy and quite meek at school but the police told us he was angry and aggressive when they questioned him, the other one was an odd character- very needy- and, it turned out, had already been accused of sexual assault by a boy when he was at primary school- no action had been taken.

PurpleFlower1983 · 08/10/2021 17:56

@Idontlike

It really is no big deal to the majority of people.

It’s a huge, and thrilling, ordeal for anyone in the area who happens to be a attracted to children unfortunately.

This.
gogohm · 08/10/2021 17:58

It's an off one, at hotel pools it's usual for communal changing and naked showers, technically it's single sex but what I experienced once is definitely for the feminist board!

daisypond · 08/10/2021 17:58

@AnkleDeep

The solution, of course, is to do away with mixed changing areas and have single sex locker rooms.

Maybe mention that next time you are there.

How is that a solution?
StripeyBadger · 08/10/2021 17:59

Whilst I can see your point, YABU and it’s a fairly standard rule in public swimming pools even if not enforced.

FKATondelayo · 08/10/2021 18:03

@AnkleDeep

The solution, of course, is to do away with mixed changing areas and have single sex locker rooms.

Maybe mention that next time you are there.

This.

I think it's OK to normalise children being fully clothed in public at all times. We are not being uptight prudes and Karens by doing that. Public pools are full of men who like to look at and photograph children (YES toddlers YES babies) naked. Why would you enable that?

My swimming pool has private single sex shower cubicles and my sons still keep their trunks on in them. Because their schools have rightly educated them on the many ways they are at risk when unclothed and vulnerable in public.

Lunde · 08/10/2021 18:07

In many Nordic countries it is actually mandatory to be naked in the pool showers

ThirdElephant · 08/10/2021 18:10

@Hmmmm2018

I am amazed at the idea children should never naked in public, what about the beach or if other houses over look your garden?
My kids don't run around naked in the garden or at the beach. What's amazing about it? A pair of pants isn't that bizarre, surely?
MilduraS · 08/10/2021 18:13

I'd rather not see anyone naked in a public area, regardless of their age.

SueSaid · 08/10/2021 18:15

Oh op protect your dd's privacy until she is old enough to do it herself. You're her parent fgs.

LoislovesStewie · 08/10/2021 18:15

@Hmmmm2018 ; so you would be happy with photos of your naked child going all round certain vile websites then for ever and ever, with the knowledge that grown men are masturbating while looking at them?

Tiramiwho · 08/10/2021 18:16

@BungleandGeorge

Is your toddler completely potty trained? I’d expect a swim nappy to be on the entire time if not! May have misunderstood you but the showers next to the pool are just for a quick rinse down, the proper showers which you can get naked/ use your shampoo etc are usually in the changing rooms

Yes, if it's the same as my gym?
Poolside showers are to rinse off only. Even little old ladies soaping their hair are frowned upon 😁 It creates a queue of annoyed people behind.
Definitely a rule in my gym.

No idea about any nudity clauses, but personally,
I feel very uncomfortable about it..
( Last night's horrific Jimmy Savile documentary still fresh in my mind )

Feetupteashot · 08/10/2021 18:22

I voted yanbu but next time you should also get naked. If not then yabu :)

Had a swimming costume shower today and it felt quite pointless. If only we were continental. Can we blame Brexit for this one?

thinkfast · 08/10/2021 18:22

I've seen the following at public swimming pool communal showers:

  • man with obvious erection under his trunks staring intently at a toddler swimming lesson
  • man masturbating next to a child showering. Child was oblivious to what was going on.

I've also seen men burst into the female changing room and a man taking photos holding his phone under communal changing room cubicles.

I reported each occasion to staff, but I expect these people are drawn to swimming pools.

Your toddler shouldn't have to cover up, but I can absolutely understand why the staff asked you to keep his clothes on.

Feetupteashot · 08/10/2021 18:23

It is tricky if communal tho

Shelovesamystery · 08/10/2021 18:23

The beach has been mentioned a few times on here and I have to say I've never really understood this obsession with letting small children be naked on the beach Confused

I've managed to take my dc's to the beach many times without ever letting them run around naked. If they need a change of clothes then I wrap a towel around them for privacy. There is never any need to let your dc's be naked in public. You have no idea who could be staring at them, taking pictures of them etc and what awful things are going on inside that persons head. It's just not worth the risk.