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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What is the most pretentious thing you've seen someone do?

912 replies

kinzarose · 05/10/2021 22:28

Inspired by another thread. When I was at university there was an older lady who thought she was vair posh, was very keen to have her designer labels on display and loved name dropping brands into conversation. We had a group tutorial over lunch once, so we all ate together. This woman took a two foot (yes, literally) wooden salt and pepper mill out of her bag, stood up and started grinding pepper onto the shop bought sandwich she had with her. It was just the most pretentious thing ever, she was a "food snob" apparently 🤣

OP posts:
TurquoiseDress · 07/10/2021 23:56

Ha ha some of these are utterly hilarious!

Grin
50ShadesOfCatholic · 08/10/2021 00:03

@Elle8344

When I asked my mum's husband why he'd spent almost £80k on a new car he replied "because I'm independently wealthy & you're not" Then I found out he was in debt & leasing it!
What a knob
Ericaequites · 08/10/2021 00:11

My mother attended a Mothers’ Tea at my private school. She was taken aback when one mummy described how she had been everywhere in Boston, but couldn’t find a white blouse. My mother worked hard with Dad in the family business, and would never had made such a rigmarole.

WalkingOnTheCracks · 08/10/2021 00:22

@Malin52

A young bearded man with a top knot outside a pub in Shoreditch smoking a pipe vape.

Me and DH were crying with laughter.

Why?
HaveringWavering · 08/10/2021 00:23

I think because it was like a toy pipe?

HaveringWavering · 08/10/2021 00:24

@Ericaequites

My mother attended a Mothers’ Tea at my private school. She was taken aback when one mummy described how she had been everywhere in Boston, but couldn’t find a white blouse. My mother worked hard with Dad in the family business, and would never had made such a rigmarole.
I don’t get this?
Pollywollydoodah · 08/10/2021 00:27

Shame that wasn't a Tesco caff - the answer would've been yes! Grin

AmySnowlish · 08/10/2021 00:32

More cringe than pretentious, but boy from college was on a student exchange for a year to the US and returned with a strong American accent. The first time he called to speak to me at home, one of my parents answered and told me there was a young American man wanting to speak to me.
He was exclaimed surprise that I had friends who lived in terraced houses, 'so small,' apparently.

Another friend I was travelling by car with, to her home where we were staying, apologised that we now had to pass the outskirts of the 'industrial estate' she meant council estate but couldn't bring herself to say it.

Another friend used to complain and wish 'common' people weren't allowed into various shops we visited. I asked her how she thought they might police that and she seemed a bit put out.

An overheard one. Child was telling his mother, after being asked, that they'd had fish fingers for lunch at school. The mother kept attempting to correct that they must have been fish goujons, with the boy equally protesting, and louder, that they were fishfingers. She then stopped.

Lots more, but mostly pretentious people thinking they're impressing (they're not) by hinting, or plain boasting about money and status. One person I know went to ballet school nearly 40 years ago, didn't go on to have a career in that field but manages to shoe horn it into most conversations in an attempt to impress.

Waitwhat23 · 08/10/2021 00:32

I was having breakfast in a (to be fair, fairly wanky) Café, when I heard some twonk declare loudly that he 'subscribes to the spectacle which is Kanye West'.

Jimmyshoes · 08/10/2021 00:42

@HepzibahNutter

Hahaha that's brilliant.

Reminds me of an acquaintance's Facebook profile :

'Doing well. Living in Chester. Married to a doctor.'

This reminded me of my friends sil's Instagram profile with emojis something like this:

Date 💍
Date 👰‍♀️🤵‍♂️
Date of birth of kids👨‍👩‍👦‍👦 🐱 🐶
👨‍✈️ ✈️ pilots wifey

JennyForeigner · 08/10/2021 01:11

I feel you. We've been looking on one of the places people leave London for. Developers threshing around like sharks thrown a bucket full of chum, buying up perfectly nice Victorians and turning everything high gloss grey like a budget remake of the Matrix.

JennyForeigner · 08/10/2021 01:14

@AmySnowlish

More cringe than pretentious, but boy from college was on a student exchange for a year to the US and returned with a strong American accent. The first time he called to speak to me at home, one of my parents answered and told me there was a young American man wanting to speak to me. He was exclaimed surprise that I had friends who lived in terraced houses, 'so small,' apparently.

Another friend I was travelling by car with, to her home where we were staying, apologised that we now had to pass the outskirts of the 'industrial estate' she meant council estate but couldn't bring herself to say it.

Another friend used to complain and wish 'common' people weren't allowed into various shops we visited. I asked her how she thought they might police that and she seemed a bit put out.

An overheard one. Child was telling his mother, after being asked, that they'd had fish fingers for lunch at school. The mother kept attempting to correct that they must have been fish goujons, with the boy equally protesting, and louder, that they were fishfingers. She then stopped.

Lots more, but mostly pretentious people thinking they're impressing (they're not) by hinting, or plain boasting about money and status. One person I know went to ballet school nearly 40 years ago, didn't go on to have a career in that field but manages to shoe horn it into most conversations in an attempt to impress.

From everything I've heard about ballet school, she's probably still traumatised.
AmySnowlish · 08/10/2021 01:19

A he, and no, quite the opposite! It wasn't anything like RB School either.

He's just the worst example of school-mention pretentiousness I know. I've known him years and he doesn't ever tire of dropping it into the conversation. You'd think he was Wayne Sleep, or similar.

Jimmyshoes · 08/10/2021 01:22

I used to work with a colleague who was just a knob but I liked her because she just made me laugh all the time. Basically in a WhatsApp chat once, another colleague asked a good but cheap iron we could all recommended her. The knob colleague responded she is going to ask her housekeeper the make of her iron that she usesGrin

Same knob one day comes into work wearing a massive classical emerald heirloom set that looks like from the Tudor era that she wore on her wedding day gifted by her inlaws (earrings, ring and massive necklace). She happily wore it that week whilst working in a marketing department wearing trainners.

Again, the same knob when she first got proposed came over to my desk to ask if she could borrow some hand cream, took off her gigantic rock and placed her engagement ring on my diary whilst gently massaging her hands with my moisturiser Grin

I can write a whole book about her Grin

ifIwerenotanandroid · 08/10/2021 01:37

Re: business class flights

DH & I had the good fortune to be gifted first class flights to America - I'd never even been upgraded before & so had no idea what it was like. We were totally spoilt in the huge & uber-stylish first class lounge where everything was free, & it didn't take long for me to turn into a pretentious twat: when we went out to queue up for the flight, my first thought was, 'They can't expect us to queue over there with the ordinary people!'. Thank goodness I managed not to say it out loud.

ColdColdWinter · 08/10/2021 02:13

@minou123

I was told off my friends mum.

Apparently, it is very unladylike to say "I'm stuffed" if you are full.

You should say "I'm Complete"

My parents were killing themselves laughing when I told them.

We all still say it 25 years later

We were taught to say, "I've had enough, thanks," but we also used to say jokingly, "I have had an elegant sufficiency."
expat101 · 08/10/2021 03:52

This no doubt sounds quite poor form compared to some of the replies, but here's mine...

Years ago, not long after starting work at a pub but in the office section, we were hosting a wake for (lets call him) Bill Smith. The powers to be decided not to close the pub to other patrons at the appointed time, and the family of the deceased also ran an open tab for those who attended the funeral. There was no way of telling who was who... (small town).

Anyhow the bar was 3 deep with patrons and so I hopped behind to give some sort of assistance and I served one youngish Gent and I asked him was he with the family for the afternoon or just dropped in for a pint.... he turned to the entire crowd at the bar and announced that ''someone'' didn't know who HE was, and surely EVERYONE knew he was John Smith.

There was a general laugh about that and that afternoon I was given some very curt stares etc. I felt about 5 cm tall but as no one else on the bar knew who was who, I shrugged it off.

As Bill Smith came from our area, when I arrived home I asked DH if he knew John Smith and told him the story. Apparently John ''Smith'' doesn't use Bill's surname in day-to-day life, being his stepson.

So I'm not entirely sure what that was about, apart perhaps from some nobody who was somebody on the day all due to his step father's passing. He certainly wasn't grieving either...

LHReturns · 08/10/2021 03:58

Half way through ordering his meal in a restaurant in a totally normal voice, a 100% British man suddenly said the word burratina in the MOST ridiculous faux affected Italian accent, before returning to his normal voice. Literally the most exaggerated accent one could fake.

My vagina just closed shut.

Nel246 · 08/10/2021 04:20

A 22 year old I was having coffee with asked a waitress for a 'small fork' to eat her cake with eventhough she had a normal sized fork already.

sjxoxo · 08/10/2021 05:06

We bought a real fixer-upper abd a few months later the house next door sold too & we had new neighbours. Their house was not ‘a wreck’ like ours, not fabulous either; but lovable sort of 1980s styling and I was hoping the newbies would spice it up and our houses (once finished) would be lovely together in our road! We were quite excited as previous couple were much much older everything v dated & the new couple were about our age so we thought ‘ooh new friends!’ And invited them round. They paid well over the going rate for the house, we couldn’t believe anyone would pay the outrageous asking price given the house stuck in the 1980s still. When they came we showed them around our house, bit of a ‘work in progress’ before having a drink, and during this the new neighbour wife said to new neighbour husband, in front of us, “still it is quite spacious” which I thought was v rude! She is about ten years younger than the rest of us & I find them so wierd even now. They’ve marked their own parking space outside and lobbied the council to put up a sign saying ‘no parking’ outside their house (it’s rural where we live!). They have finally gotten round to updating the front of their house and we did secretly have a little giggle when we saw their planning application had been refused for a 2m high wall all around the front of their property (like a fort!) and the feedback from the council was to find a ‘more tasteful solution like a green or brown fence that is in keeping with the other properties in the area’ 😁 xo

swissmummy12345 · 08/10/2021 06:27

@Toasteh

Ok maybe the opposite of pretentious, but I was with my husband on a business trip in Saudi, and since he used to travel a lot we often stayed in an extremely nice hotel where got to access the lounge for unlimited champagne, wine and dinner + breakfast. Think top of the top (no need for a menu) and then a bit more. 😂 Anyway, every night there was an American business man in his 60’s sitting by himself in his very nice suit talking loudly on his phone sounding very important drinking his champagne. And then every morning for breakfast (as usual in nice suit and tie) he’d tell the waiter what he wanted, looked around and when he thought noone was watching he took out this giant tub of Peter Pan Creamy Peanut Butter from his bag to spread quickly on his bread and put it back again. It just made me smile, and not feel so out of place after all. 😂
I smell bullshit. I'd love to know where you got alcohol in Saudi Arabia from seeing as it is illegal to consume there!

Even British Airways only offered booze from the sealed trollies once we'd left Saudi airspace.

daisychain01 · 08/10/2021 06:38

@Dibble135

My old boss used to speak about himself in the third person 🙄
When I first started work, I temped for a company owned by a person whose first name was Patrick, and he used to refer to himself in all meetings and conversations as Patrick, it was so cringeworthy and I initially couldn't understand who this other Patrick was - it was him Grin

Patrick wants a team meeting every Monday
Patrick feels productivity needs to improve.

Pretentious? Patrick?

minou123 · 08/10/2021 06:50

I'll admit to my own recent pretentious wankery.

Spring cleaning my house, I found I own small forks to eat cakes (or cake forks, if you will).

Much hilarity, I rang my mum to tell her and found myself asking her if she still had the Grapefruit Spoons and if I could have them, as its the only way I'll eat grapefruit.

Snob, moi? Never Grin

hollyivysaurus · 08/10/2021 07:10

I was in the park with my little boy and there was a lady with a similarly aged daughter there. There’s a little hatch in a play house thing where the kids often pretend to be selling ice cream from. This woman asks her daughter for a bowl of kale soup, and mimes eating it…

I usually chat to anyone and everyone in the park, but I did not engage with kale soup lady!!

Ruralbliss · 08/10/2021 07:18

Me aged eight travelling home via train with my mum as it pulled into a station I pipe up loudly "Oh Mummy. How could anyone choose to live here its absolutely horrid!" as loads of people queued to get off.

I still cringe now four decades later. Suspect she was close to throttling me.