To know anyone irl with munchausens?

[Lw87]

Watching the gypsy rose doc, I'd never heard of munchausens disease before and can't even think I'd know anyone with it in real life

Has anyone actually had an RL encounter with someone with this?

@itssarcasmjoan

I'll tell you how these people get test and results they want. They harass, harangue and general don't let up. They will send multiple emails, text and phone calls, they will talk in Person on and on until people give in to get rid of them. They're behaviour is bullying/starker like.

I've already tried that and it still hasn't worked.

Yes, a friend. Before she had DC she was always fainting in toilet cubicles and calling an ambulance, or having crutches or an air boot for months on end for no reason. Said she had prolapsed discs and went to hospital - she was screaming so much they gave her enough painkillers to kill a horse but she was still in pain - MRI'd her as she was refusing to walk - found nothing of significance. Luckily it's calmed down a bit since DC.

Yes, a couple of times in nursery parents. Very difficult situations. If you think they’re lying/inventing, you can’t exactly say so.
We were very sorry for one child in particular.

As a teenager I knew a girl who I suspected had Munchausen’s ( though I didn’t know that label then) She spent hours in each week going to her GP, persuading him/ her to send her to a hospital. She’d had several exploratory operations, loved telling our group the details and how much could have gone wrong; nothing was ever found and around us she was always lively, talkative, ate normally etc..
Later, in my working life, I suspected a couple of parents had Munchausen’s by proxy, or variations of it. Social Services were involved as in one case there’d been other suspicions by the health visitor and school staff.

@Chickoletta

Posted too soon… So many things just don’t add up about her various medical conditions.

That’s probably because you’re not with her 24/7…… so have no right to make any judgement

Honestly this thread is like reading my gossipy subject access request notes. So many assumptions and opinions so much hearsay and suspicion based on well sketchy info or your own observations/feelings. It’s a dangerous assumption to make and causes thousands of parents absolute hell if all they are doing is trying to secure treatment/support/diagnosis etc

so have no right to make any judgement don’t be ridiculous, of course people have a right to use their judgement to assess the information they have. I can see it would be horrendous to be falsely accused but surely we’d rather that than leave any child being abused?

My ex kept pretending to have seizures, all the time but apparently didn't need medication.. I actually have epilepsy and we lasted about 3 weeks before his ex best friend told me he does that for attention

Your MIL is the unreasonable one. Her behaviour is totally unacceptable.
This is your baby, yours and your husband’s. She and your father in law are invited guests and should behave as such.
Yes, she’s an adorable baby and your MIL might love babies BUT she doesn’t own yours.
I think you and your husband need to draw up some rules and boundaries. In laws get invited to visit. If you go out maybe MIL can push the pram there, then you say Husband ( or you) will push baby home. Tell your MIL how kind it is if her to prepare a meal—- while you and baby have some alone time. Kindly, but firmly let her find her role as granny on your terms.

A friends Mum pretended to have cancer when we were younger. Unsurprisingly all her kids now have no contact with her. Very strange woman

@MargaretThursday

I suspect there's different categories people are talking about here:

1. Health anxiety. Where they are genuinely anxious, see the doctor, doctor tells them they don't have it and they either are relieved and move onto the next illness worry, or worry the doctor may be wrong and demand further tests. They don't want there to be something wrong.

1. People who exaggerate their illness/symptoms because either they want sympathy or because they think they won't be taken seriously if they don't have "bigger" symptoms.

1. People who are genuinely ill and their symptoms don't fit into a natural diagnosis. They can't get an answer so seem to be adding more symptoms because they hope that something else will be the key to finding what's wrong, or the next specialist will be able to find out. Because an answer to what is wrong may mean they may be able to do something that helps.

1. Genuinely M/mbp

I suspect 4 is the smallest category, and 1 is the biggest.

Agree. Lots of PPs talking about people who are not munchausens/fabricating at all. It isn't a description for the worried-well or somatising illness, it is a condition in which a person knows they aren't unwell but self-harm to create the symptoms of illness deliberately. It's compulsive - I think - so they can't just stop, they are very unwell and dangerous to themselves or others. It's not 'hypochondria' or health anxiety or somatic disease.

NC because this could be outing but I am very close with someone who has a fictitious disorder. I she had her child removed at birth due to concerns of her displaying behaviours 'by proxy' and I know that the adopters were told to take anything she says during contact regarding their health with a pinch of salt because there were concerns she would try to manipulate them into placating her worries

Forgot to add the part that might actually make it identifying 🙄 but after her c-section she actually ripped open her stitches so that they wouldn't discharge her.

@5zeds

so have no right to make any judgement don’t be ridiculous, of course people have a right to use their judgement to assess the information they have. I can see it would be horrendous to be falsely accused but surely we’d rather that than leave any child being abused?

The particular poster I said that about does have no right to judge another persons child

If they were on here saying they were a professional who knew a lot about a family and child and had FACTUAL information then yes, they could use their own judgment but you can’t just judge without knowing any facts and just assume from seeing just a brief snapshot of someone’s life !

This is usually where you get the phrase ‘well they look fine to me’ …..

I’ve just moved but I’m absolutely positive that my old neighbour has Munchausens (or whatever it’s called now) She was always presenting herself at different hospitals, calling ambulances or making private appointments with Consultants. I took her to her a couple of these appointments and both Consultants said there was nothing they could do for her (after various tests, MRI and CT scans!) and suggested she needed psychiatric help which she vehemently refused. I’m no longer in touch with her as I found it so frustrating that she wouldn’t accept help.

FII is incredibly rare this thread is just bitchy and gossipy. Unless you’re with someone 24/7 you have no idea.

Lots of parents with children with hidden disabilities get accused of this or if the children have ASD and mask at school. It is an incredibly damaging accusation and not something that shown be thrown around so carelessly as there are far more cases of harm done by wrongful accusations than there are of real FII cases.

Yes I looked after a patient who had it she was the most manipulative, demanding and draining person ive ever met.

It's interesting, isn't it, how convincing some people who are suffering from this problem can be even to those trained to recognise it? Many years ago, I volunteered for a counselling organisation. After training I was surprised to find that several long term volunteersk including the director, were disregarding everything we had been taught. They were breaking every rule to support a terminally I'll woman and her young daughter.

Don't know how that happened I was trying to say 'terminally ill woman'.
But it turned out she wasn't ill in that way. This had gone on for many months and she had created convincing scenarios, shaving her head, inserting cannulas etc. She was only 'found out' when the director visited her in hospital, where she was being treated for a real illness, only to be met with incredulity when she mentioned her client's terminal condition to the ward sister.

There were many resignations but the question remained how best to support this obviously sick woman.

@cushioncovers have also looked after one definite Munchausens patient who was exactly as you describe, I actually felt very sorry for her, it was such a waste of a life.

@damageReputation

FII is incredibly rare this thread is just bitchy and gossipy. Unless you’re with someone 24/7 you have no idea.

Lots of parents with children with hidden disabilities get accused of this or if the children have ASD and mask at school. It is an incredibly damaging accusation and not something that shown be thrown around so carelessly as there are far more cases of harm done by wrongful accusations than there are of real FII cases.

Yes this. This thread is a really hard read, firstly as a parent of DC on the spectrum. The battles I had to get a diagnosis was horrendous and took years. It would incredibly difficult to fake autism considering how hard the diagnosis battles are.

Secondly fibromyalgia and ME patients have to battle this sort of attitude every day. It just shows the ignorance the general public has to these conditions. You might well see someone with ME coping fine and out and about one day, what you don't see is the knock on effect that has. A shopping trip can end up with a week of pain and suffering for it afterwards. This applies to many chronic conditions.

So be very careful when assuming something like Munchausens, yes it's sad but it's incredibly rare.

I don't know anyone personally besides a person who used to massively exaggerate her epilepsy symptoms for attention, but I know of two people in the US who were known for faking symptoms of a long list of different conditions to get treatments that became more and more severe as time went on.

One of them managed to get a gastronomy tube but repeatedly tampered with it until she did major damage to her organs and died. The other messed up her legs so badly she needed massive skin grafts, she went on to tamper with the skin grafts (doctors treating her found fecal matter in the wounds) and eventually needed a double amputation.

@Tibtab That’s shocking, what’s the reason behind it? Just attention?

Yes, unfortunately a number of times, although it’s called fabricated or induced illness. Relating to pupil and parents in school, it’s very complex & damaging and difficult to get Health professionals to take responsibility for addressing this with parents.

@ThumbWitchesAbroad

Not Munchausens, no - but I have known several hypochondriacs.

And then there's the people like my mum, who always had a cold worse than anyone else (Flu), or pretty much anything worse than anyone else EVAH. (Until she was actually seriously ill, then she'd downplay it).

This was my mum too!

My DC school suspected me of having this even though my son had a full diagnosis of SENDs by consultant and walked in strange way without splints too if he didnt wear splits.Oh apparently I made that up cos he didnt walk way at school,well that's cos he wearing the splints(idiots)
It came to a head as school weren't using his 1 to 1 money on him for his care at school and I complained, then they put in this accusation about me to social services.It was very stressful but it badly back fired actually onto them as we were both watched and the school were actually found at fault of neglect not me and social services couldn't find any fault.my sons GP and consultant were mega mega annoyed!!!..but the stress at the time was huge on us as a family but we got through it and once my child moved to a decent next stage school he flourished