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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not go mushroom foraging with my teenage son

134 replies

Patchwork21 · 04/10/2021 13:55

14ds has a fascination with mushrooms. He's researched and says he knows there are certain types that are 100 percent easy to identify as safe to eat. He wants me to go with him to pick some and them bring them home to eat. I said no, as I have no experience whatsoever with mushrooms. He says I'm irrational and lots of parents take their children mushroom picking 🍄

OP posts:
samwitwicky · 04/10/2021 13:58

Wouldn't it be something nice / fun etc to do with your child, regardless of how much you know about them?

You don't have to eat them

WhoWearsShortShorts · 04/10/2021 13:58

Nope I wouldn't either. If you aren't confident in his ability could you get him a foraging course as a gift?

www.findmeagift.co.uk/gifts/wild-food-foraging.html

twobarnsmammisonthebus · 04/10/2021 13:58

Ah, I can see where you’re coming from but surely it would be worth indulging the idea if he wants to do something together with you? There must be guides online about what’s safe and what isn’t. Or maybe a local wildlife trust does foraging trips or something? It’s huge where we live (admittedly that’s Sweden) and while I wouldn’t want to go without some reliable info about poisonous kinds, outdoor activities with teen kids at their own request seems like a kind of holy grail of parenting, so i’d go for it. Side note tho: make sure he’s not secretly hoping to find and then peddle magic mushrooms, and disguising it as a wholesome family outing 😂

rainbowstardrops · 04/10/2021 13:59

I wouldn't be confident to know what was safe and what wasn't but I have very fond memories of my dad going mushroom foraging when I was young!

QuentinBunbury · 04/10/2021 14:01

I think if your 14yo DS wants to actively spend time with you, you should definitely do it.

Original poster
Patchwork21 · 04/10/2021 14:02

@samwitwicky

Wouldn't it be something nice / fun etc to do with your child, regardless of how much you know about them?

You don't have to eat them

I don't mind going. The issue is he wants to eat some!! I said yes to going to look, identifying them etc just no to eating them.
OP posts:
Theunamedcat · 04/10/2021 14:02

In my local area there are guided tours what you can and cannot eat for you have anything like that by you?

MyDcAreMarvel · 04/10/2021 14:02

I think it’s brilliant your teenager wants to spend time with you doing such a fantastic activity. I agree with your ds, just research well.

steff13 · 04/10/2021 14:03

It's an opportunity to spend some one-on-one time with your teenage son, something that will likely be in short supply in the coming years. I'd go.

Northernsoullover · 04/10/2021 14:04

Hell no, remember that author that nearly killed his family? He was experienced too.

Wazzzzzzzup · 04/10/2021 14:04

Ooooh i really enjoy mushroom foraging. Where I grew up it's common. We all do. It's great relax.
If you keep to the few basic ones, you are totally safe.
There are now apps which can help you identify them as well.

ThisBear · 04/10/2021 14:04

I know people who do this, but their extended family have all grown up foraging, have passed on the knowledge for generations, so have a very good feel for what's right and what's not.

The course sounds like a good idea though! Thinking of my own family, I'd probably suggest mushroom spotting instead of foraging to eat, and see how many we could photograph and identify (while leaving them well alone where we found them!) but that may or may not appeal.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 04/10/2021 14:05

You absolutely need to know what you're doing - there have been some horrendous cases where this has gone horribly wrong:www.theguardian.com/books/2011/nov/13/filmadaptations

I think it's great that your ds wants to do it with you though, so why not book onto a local guided trip together. I think our local Wildlife Trust runs them, so might be worth looking in your area.

Original poster
Patchwork21 · 04/10/2021 14:07

@EmmaGrundyForPM

You absolutely need to know what you're doing - there have been some horrendous cases where this has gone horribly wrong:www.theguardian.com/books/2011/nov/13/filmadaptations

I think it's great that your ds wants to do it with you though, so why not book onto a local guided trip together. I think our local Wildlife Trust runs them, so might be worth looking in your area.

That's what worries me. He said you can't mistake some edible ones but I just don't want to take the risk!
OP posts:
Original poster
Patchwork21 · 04/10/2021 14:07

@ThisBear

I know people who do this, but their extended family have all grown up foraging, have passed on the knowledge for generations, so have a very good feel for what's right and what's not.

The course sounds like a good idea though! Thinking of my own family, I'd probably suggest mushroom spotting instead of foraging to eat, and see how many we could photograph and identify (while leaving them well alone where we found them!) but that may or may not appeal.

That's what I have suggested which is great but what he really wants to do is bring some home to eat!
OP posts:
BabyOctopus · 04/10/2021 14:08

I really wouldn’t go without a proper expert. The consequences are potentially enormous if a mistake is made. This story about Nicholas Evans, the writer of the Horse Whisperer, is a real eye-opener (and he’d been picking mushrooms for years).
www.google.com/amp/s/www.scotsman.com/news/we-all-fell-sick-and-when-i-checked-mushroom-book-it-said-deadly-1705876%3famp

Rangoon · 04/10/2021 14:09

I gather there is an exception to almost every "guaranteed safe" rule. I do remember the author too - I think the three adults needed liver transplants. My parents used to gather mushrooms but they were country people and presumably could identify mushrooms properly which wasn't something they passed on to me.

Wazzzzzzzup · 04/10/2021 14:09

I like how 3 people mention horrible storieS and it's one person's one...

BabyOctopus · 04/10/2021 14:09

Sorry, see that somebody already posted the story!

Wazzzzzzzup · 04/10/2021 14:10

If you are really that apprehensive, the foraging course would be great.
Also there are foraging groups around UK. I was aurprised how super niche it is here.

Move him onto foraging herbs 😁

Phyllis321 · 04/10/2021 14:10

I did a foraging course recently and we picked, cooked and ate Dryad's Sidesaddle which was delicious and very easy to spot.

Why not do a course together? It was good fun.

Original poster
Patchwork21 · 04/10/2021 14:11

@Phyllis321

I did a foraging course recently and we picked, cooked and ate Dryad's Sidesaddle which was delicious and very easy to spot.

Why not do a course together? It was good fun.

Fab idea. Will have a look for one!!
OP posts:
FangsForTheMemory · 04/10/2021 14:13

Toadstools are very easy to make mistakes with and on top of that, some people have reactions to eating even the safe ones. If he is interested, you could find him an established expert who's running classes.

FreeBritnee · 04/10/2021 14:13

[quote BabyOctopus]I really wouldn’t go without a proper expert. The consequences are potentially enormous if a mistake is made. This story about Nicholas Evans, the writer of the Horse Whisperer, is a real eye-opener (and he’d been picking mushrooms for years).
www.google.com/amp/s/www.scotsman.com/news/we-all-fell-sick-and-when-i-checked-mushroom-book-it-said-deadly-1705876%3famp[/quote]
God that’s horrific!!

Wazzzzzzzup · 04/10/2021 14:17

@FangsForTheMemory

Toadstools are very easy to make mistakes with and on top of that, some people have reactions to eating even the safe ones. If he is interested, you could find him an established expert who's running classes.
Toadstools are dostinguishible from something basic like edible basic boletus types (which is what I would keep with as beginner). There is no edible toadstool as far as I know