What stupid things do you do that no one else knows about?

[FancySomeChips]

I used to be a party animal. LOVED clubbing every weekend (multiple times a week as a student), would dance for hours and laugh and laugh and laugh.

Tonight I am sitting in my cuddle chair putting chewits down my bra to warm them up before I eat them.
I’m home alone.

How life has changed.

Make me feel better, what weird stuff do you do that no one else knows about?!

I pat my car's dashboard when we get home from a long journey, and tell it what a good car it is.

And today on a walk I found myself talking to a squirrel up a tree. It was unimpressed.

@waybill

I pat my car's dashboard when we get home from a long journey, and tell it what a good car it is.

And today on a walk I found myself talking to a squirrel up a tree. It was unimpressed.

😊 you sound like my kind of person !

@Neron

If there's 2 items left on a shelf, that I only need to purchase 1 of - I have to take them both. Can't leave 1, it will get lonely...

Oh my god, yes. Can't leave one all sad on the shelf.

Can't lie, I once bought a vase from a large collection of identical vases from a charity shop. I didn't want to leave the vase I'd bought without any company, when it came from such a big family, so I bought one of its' siblings, and they sit together in the cupboard.

...it looks worse written down than it did in my head at the time.

If I ever see 1 magpie, I have to salute it and say ‘I salute you mr magpie’. When using the microwave I set myself a task that I have to complete before it pings. Always talk to my children’s toys when putting them away ‘right back in the box you go until 5 minutes times when you’ll be tipped out again’

When I make Birds custard from powder (2 spoons of powder, two of sugar, slurp of milk then add boiling milk) I always actually make it with three spoons so that I can eat a spoonful of the mixture. I like it better than cooked custard.

I also talk to myself in foreign accents at home - my favourite is South African.

I don't actually think this is weird but DH tells me it is, I say please and thank you to our Google home hub thing. For example 'ok Google, play radio 4 please', Google says playing BBC radio 4 then switches the broadcast and I say thank you. My argument is that good manners are always important, his is that it's an inanimate object and the Google lady is not a person.

I have a tiny teddy bear that I rescued. She used to be a keyring but I cut the nasty metal bit off her head. There is a veeeery long story but she is now my lawyer. My husband and kids are told they will have to go through her if they want me to do anything when they are pissing me off....

When I tidy my DS' happy land toys I make sure they're put together in the family units I've created in my imagination.
If I mix it up I feel bad for them (especially the children, they'd miss their mummies).

I'm 31...

Love how this has turned into a cat thread - I sing The Three Little kittens song to them but do Two as only two of them and do Baby Shark to them but with their names 😁

I’ve found my people!!! I sing to my dog all the time. To the tune of blurred lines.

“You’re a good dog, you’re really really fluffy.”
“What do doggies dream of? When they do that twitching, what do doggies dream of? You’re the cutest dog in this park”
“You are so fluffy, want to get very huggy, cos you’re so fluffy”

@feathermucker

If I'm using 'ok Google' or Alexa, I always say please 😳

I do, too. And judge those who don't. When my son (8) objected, I told him about a book I had as a child, where the automatic doors of a supermarket go haywire when people stop saying 'Thank you'. He was moved to tears 😂

Such a good idea with the chewits! I put Lindor truffles under my armpit to warm up before eating them, so that the centre goes all nice and melty…

When I go to the toilet at work, especially if there’s people in the ladies, I shut the cubicle door then pull mad screw faces at the back of the door and in my head make weird noises that I mouth at the door

I pluck all the hairs out my armpits.

@Neron

If there's 2 items left on a shelf, that I only need to purchase 1 of - I have to take them both. Can't leave 1, it will get lonely...

I don't do this but I totally get it. I apologise to mugs if one from a set has to go in a different area of the dishwasher or on a different shelf in the cupboard from its friends. Feels like I'm isolating one from the group .

@sobercuriouskind

I pluck all the hairs out my armpits.

just OW!!!! Why not shave them?

I weirdly enjoy it. Especially if I get one with a bulb.

@TulipsHyacinths

Such a good idea with the chewits! I put Lindor truffles under my armpit to warm up before eating them, so that the centre goes all nice and melty…

I struggle to eat one before it's melted and run off my hand onto the floor! My armpits would be in a terrible state if I tried this.

You know how with parking threads it has become the rules that there must be a diagram....

Can we make a new one that if you post about singing to your dog you have to post a picture please

I cant leave the last bean in the tin, or peas in the saucepan as they would be sad and not have fulfilled their destiny / gone onto the plate / tummy with their friends.

I sing to my chihuahua. Georgie porgie puddin and a pie pie pie. Kissed all the girl chibubas in the world and made them sigh. When all the boy chibubas came out to play play play. He smashed em up and they ran away away away. Haha.

I do ballet barre routines against the kitchen counter whilst dinner is in the oven. It means that despite being a size 26 I'm surprisingly flexible.

@Deux bra warming is the most efficient and accessible method of sweet warming up

Missing the point of your question but you can toast Starburst. I assume Chewits would also work. Might be better than sticky boobs. Or not, your choice

My daughter loves Justin Fletcher, so most evenings are Alexa play a mega mix of his greatest hits. 'Ten In The Bed' is an absolute banger and, if she's asleep, I go in and absolutely dance the arse out of it. Especially the chord changes in between verses. Bogling, sexy biting of lower lip, all that.