Was he unreasonable?

[ButterflyBailey]

I have never posted in AIBU before but need an honest opinion.
So, I went for lunch with a friend. I had a meal that was cheaper than my friend's. He had Steak and a dessert whereas I had no dessert and a reasonably priced meal. I suggested to my friend that we pay for what we had to eat. My meal after a misunderstanding was on the house. I insisted I pay for my meal but the restaurant wouldn't let me. He then said we would go halves. What we were going halves on was just his meal. I felt this unfair as he was the one ordering expensive things from a restaurant which isn't exactly cheap. In the end we did go halves but I feel the he was unreasonable to say that to the waiting staff. I would have paid for the drinks and felt he should have paid for himself since that was originally the idea. Who is unreasonable? What should I do?

I would have paid half because I wouldn’t embarrass myself sitting there quibbling about money that I would have been spending on my meal anyway. In his position I wouldn’t have asked for it though.

@RosieGuacamosie I have no issue whatsoever as I have said I don't mind paying half or just for the drinks.

[quote ButterflyBailey]@RosieGuacamosie I have no issue whatsoever as I have said I don't mind paying half or just for the drinks.[/quote]
What? You said in you’re OP you think he’s unreasonable!

@Divebar2021 I had no problem paying for half and think it was fine

So you were due to pay £12.95 and you also mention £8 worth of drinks.
You still enjoyed your meal and ate it. Somehow the restaurant refunded your meal and in the end you split a bill at £14 each and you think this is a problem.

I actually feel sorry for the restaurant that refunded your meal as you actually benefited from your own mistake but then begrudge splitting the bill between you and your friend.

Are you actually cheesed off with the difference between £14.00 and £12.95 though quite where the drinks come into play within these numbers.

@RosieGuacamosie I also have said I'm fine whichever way I pay

@friendlycat No, I'm not annoyed and was embarrassed that they refunded my meal at my mistake

If you'd agreed to split 50:50 before hand, then it turned out your meal (or his) was free, I'd have just gone ahead and split 50:50 anyway.

However, I usually don't agree to split 50:50. People think I'm tight for it, but I always end up out of pocket because I don't buy the expensive options or pile the drinks in.

@ButterflyBailey

I'm fine either way. I'm just asking if he was unreasonable asking

I suppose he was cheeky to ask but you were cheeky not to offer to go halves as soon as you found out your meal had been deducted, so it cancels out.

@friendlycat No I'm not cheesed off at all. I'm fine splitting the bill 50/50

@chesirecat99 I said how did he want to pay both after and before my meal had been deducted. I asked him both times 50/50 or what we ate

I don't like bill splitting generally.

If my meal was comped, I'd offer to pay towards my friends. If I have vouchers, I usually split them (not If they're gift vouchers as I'm still paying). If I had a two for one or something, I'd share.

I wouldn't offer to pay half if theirs was £25 and mine was £12.50 and mine had been comped though. They'd be getting the discount then, I'd offer something but not half.

When there's an error, it affects the experience for everyone, not just the person who was directly affected.

A few months ago, I was out with two vegan friends, one vegetarian and one meat eater. They mistakenly gave the vegans meat, all of our meals and drinks were given for free. I wouldn't expect that much but it does take into account that everyone's night had a dampener put on it.

@chesirecat99 I couldn't care less paying 50/50 I'm just asking also why he didn't accept me paying for drinks when he also chose the steak and dessert and I had no dessert or steak. I had also said I paid for half of his because mine was free

I don't mind how I pay

His meal wasn't overly expensive even though he had the steak it was only slightly more expensive than yours. So I don't think he was deliberately ordering something expensive to you would pay more than your fair share
I'd have did what you did and paid half. Unless I was really skint and the £6 difference was a lot to me

You keep going on about being willing to pay for drinks, but that’s not what you report here as being what you suggested at the time.

You suggested 50/50 or pay for own.
How was he supposed to know that pay for own included you paying for his drinks?

Honestly, if you were this unclear in the bloody restaurant, poor friend probably thought he’d offered to pay for his anyway 🙄

You got a meal and drinks for less than the price written on the menu. So what is your problem?!!!!

@Cocomarine I don't have any problem

You’re getting too invested in the steak, I think.

What if your risotto was £12.95 and he had a £12.95 lasagne, no dessert.

Then yours was free, because of your mistake that didn’t impact you at all as you still enjoyed the dish.

Would you have watched your lasagne eating friend pay £12.95 for hers, whilst you punched the air and declared “freebie, winner!” ?

@Cocomarine I don't think I was unclear and I have said multiple times how either way I don't mind how I pay.

Well, you clearly do mind!

“I felt this unfair”

@Cocomarine I don't mind. I was uncomfortable with the restaurant taking mine off of the Bill. I said I would go halves with my friend as I was uncomfortable with mine being taken off

I sometimes wonder why people go out for meals with friends/family

[quote ButterflyBailey]@Cocomarine I don't mind. I was uncomfortable with the restaurant taking mine off of the Bill. I said I would go halves with my friend as I was uncomfortable with mine being taken off[/quote]
If you didn’t mind paying half of the remaining bill, which was less than your own meal and drinks would have cost, then why post that it felt unfair and that he was unreasonable?

There are posters who think you should have had the whole compensation to yourself: I disagree with them, I think it’s mean - but I see their logic and they are consistent. We just have a different opinion.

But you are not consistent.

At least post and say you’re cross - then 50% will agree and 50% won’t. Instead, 100% just think make your bloody mind up!

Rah I definitely wouldn't have paid!! It was his meal, not yours!
I wouldn't say anything just don't go eat with him again lol