AIBU for thinking hating people for their political leanings is perfectly normal?

[VelvetChairGirl]

I have been reading a brexit thread on here and lots of brexit voters in it seem horrified that they are hated and families have stopped talking to each other, and cut each other off over it.

but its politics nothing affects us more then politics, we have people who cut off others for believing in conspiracy theories and things. Brexit is the biggest shake up in this country in my life time, its taken away our freedom of movement for work and education, needlessly introduced a tonne of red tape, made our rights and standards extremely vulnerable to being destroyed (tories dont like food standards and workers rights this is well documented and they are in charge right now), reduced our standing in the world and will very likely lead us to being the poor man of Europe again, not to mention the fact its cut off vital EU funding to science research, regeneration and education projects up and down the county.

it affects everyone, of course people are perfectly entitled to hate those who voted to hurt them financially, prospects wise etc as much as they would hate someone who physically stole from them, theres very little difference is there?

My neighbour hates me because I vote differently to her.

This hatred translates into encouraging others (with her same political views) to vandalise my house and car, throwing rubbish into my garden, shouting abuse at visitors to my house and many other things.

This is what hating people for having different democratic opinions means.

It's simply untrue that Labour introduced the minimum wage because they were forced into it by the EU. Several EU countries still don't have a minimum wage.

I think hatred is very unproductive emotion. Connecting with people and understanding different points of views is the only way forwards. Of course there are very extreme views that can be hard to reconcile with, but generally I believe in building bridges, not walls. You don't have to give up your principles or pretend, but you can still find ways to connect.

Dominic Raab is taking PMQ's today. I won't say I hate him but if he had to spend the rest of his days shitting out pine cones, well I wouldn't be upset about it.

I'm willing to say that I have nothing but contempt for people who voted for Brexit.

I think it's fine to despise particular points of view, and opinions, and yes that can colour your perception of the person, but to say you hate them is really strong. I can't understand homophobes, for example, and think their views are abhorrent. I don't hate everyone with these views though - I may not choose to associate with them as much, or if I have to for work or whatever, I am polite but avoid the topic. Someone with those views is unlikely to share similar values to me in that sphere. We may still have other things in common - such as enjoying football, watching documentaries, eating hotdogs - but the aspect I find distasteful would be a deal breaker for a friendship.

With political views it is similar, although with politics many people are open minded and will engage with the party that represents them best at the time of an election. The so called swinging voters that main parties try to appeal to, to swell their vote. Sure, tribal voting does go on, but to hate a Green Party voter (for example) because you voted Tory, or whatever, is too simplistic and reinforces the tribal voting.

@Mamamia7962

I don't have a clue who my family and friends vote for in a general election. Why would you even ask someone, and I certainly wouldn't fall out with someone unless they had really extreme views and constantly went on about that it.

I also don't think Mumsnet is representative of the general population.

I also agree with this.

I don't know who my oh votes for and the same goes for my parents. I could make an educated guess but that's all it would be.

I strongly suspect that my partner and I came down on different sides in the Scottish independence vote. And I suspect that my parents voted differently to each other as well. We had several debates over it. But that's what they were debates where each of us respected the others views even though they might be different to my own.

I've noticed it's always Labour supporters who are intolerant.

I think the incredible negativity and ‘laughing stock’ etc mentality and hatred of so much of the public as stupid is hampering any positive narrative or success for the party / left. It’s making it harder to regain ground.

My actual hate is directed toward the people most responsible for decisions that hurt ordinary people

But I do take a dim view of people who like or vote for those people.

There are some indigenous people who hate the political folks responsible for their literal and cultural genocide. I won't judge them for the way they feel. Typical of some posters here to say those indigenous peoples are lesser humans for hating the white supremacists who decimated their populations, languages, traditions, and who still occupy their land and pollute their water. Easy to pass judgement from comfort.

@BigHeartyTruffle

It’s not just about opinions though is it - the way people vote is an expression of their morals and values. While I would never hate anyone for disagreeing with me, I do have to question the values of people who (e.g.) vote for a party that presides over massive cuts to welfare. And to be honest this does make me inclined to dislike them.

Very much agree

As a general left leaning, but no longer a labour supporter, who voted remain - I don't think I'll ever be able to vote for them again unless they can fashion a political discourse that doesn't blame their failure on the voters they show nothing but contempt for. That's just not something I can get behind.

@MarshaBradyo

Op what do you think about the term bigot and who it applies to?

Does hate qualify?

a person who is obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices.

I dont think it applies to brexit, its not a belief, all the experts warned us, economists, scientists etc and we know how this country was before we joined the single market and how much is demonstrably improved the country.

bigot is a pointless word its rather fashionable at the moment for bigots to declare everyone else a bigot for not doing what they say, I have yet to hear a decent argument from anyone who cry's bigot as to why the person they are insulting is one, be they a gender ideologist, flat earther, brexiter, vaccine supporter/denier etc.

I think it depends on how we're defining hate. I know some use it as a strong dislike, but to me it's something more than that which I rarely have the energy for anymore. I honestly don't see in this case how it helps anything.

I'm a non-EU immigrant, I didn't have the vote at the referendum, didn't really have freedom of movement ever and I've had my rights fucked with by the government repeatedly well before this. Literally had to spend over £300 to get some of my rights back (BRP) that I'd already had (Indefinite Leave to Remain). I lived in an area that had all UKIP councillors, I'm in a new area that has UKIP version 3+ councillors, it's highly probably some around here want people like me to fuck off. I don't hate them though. I don't see the point and as a pp said, it feels a bit lazy. If I hate them, then I can disregard everything they say, and nothing really changes other than I feel the physical effects of hating someone.

I actually have a bit more ire towards some in the Remain campaign who acted as if being the status quo was good enough (Incumbents often have an advantage, but they usually do far more that I saw), that they didn't really need to make their case beyond 'we're not racists', that they could just hold up the things they thought of as nice and not really think of any solutions to the problems others saw. It's pointed out many time since that many of the concerns could have been dealt with through the laws within the EU - why wasn't this bold and centre in the Remain campaign? Maybe I missed it, but I saw no politicians discussing what changes could be made to deal with people concerns, only that we can't change the EU if we leave - well obviously, how was that helpful to convincing anyone?

Yes, many of the Leave campaigns tactics were dirty, but Remain had access to enough resources to do far better than they did - they just underestimated the problem and thought just painting Leavers as bad people, EU as good would be enough. They treated it as if it didn't really matter, like they couldn't lose. They were very wrong and I think they need to take some of the responsibility that they didn't really work to connect with people rather than keep going on about how terrible Leavers are.

The bar to not deal with people is not at hate them. You can not deal with people or that a relationship isn't worth the effort to maintain just because there are better uses of your time & energy. I think sometimes political things like this push people to feel that way even when they've no ill will towards another person. I think labeling that automatically as hate misses out on that.

I don’t have a clue who any of my friends or family vote for either, nor they me. If I had to guess I suspect they probably span across the main parties. Never argue over religion or politics was the advice I was given and I live by that.

I do have a few acquaintances who are “political keyboard warriors” on Facebook and Twitter who have less tolerant views of those who disagree with them and think they’re right and everyone who disagrees is wrong or have a bad moral compass etc but I tend to just leave them to their rankings and get on with my day.

@FourTeaFallOut

As a general left leaning, but no longer a labour supporter, who voted remain - I don't think I'll ever be able to vote for them again unless they can fashion a political discourse that doesn't blame their failure on the voters they show nothing but contempt for. That's just not something I can get behind.

This is how I feel too

Unless they sort this out it’s too much dislike and contempt - and hopefully you’d see less of it on SM from the left

I have friends who, I know, have different political views to my own, voted differently on the Brexit issue, support political causes which I find - at best - perverse and generally have differing views to my own on a whole range of issues which affect all our lives.

They're still friends because they are kind, loyal, supportive, interesting, fun people to be around. Being a tory/labour supporter, voting leave/remain etc does not make them bad people worthy of hatred. It makes them individuals with their own opinions.

@1mumm

There are some indigenous people who hate the political folks responsible for their literal and cultural genocide. I won't judge them for the way they feel. Typical of some posters here to say those indigenous peoples are lesser humans for hating the white supremacists who decimated their populations, languages, traditions, and who still occupy their land and pollute their water. Easy to pass judgement from comfort.

I agree

I feel a real sense of complacency on this thread, like how could political views ever really harm anyone, you should just engage with anyone who thinks differently

I would never blame someone for hating people responsible for hurting them

a person who is obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices.

This sounds quite close to me. Certainly not flexible or open to difference. Up for debate I’d say on whether it qualifies.

I guess it depends on what you mean by hate - i hate the fact that due to the voting persuasion of a sizable minority of the population i am forced to live in a country whose values i abhor and where i do not feel i belong or will ever be fully accepted and that i am utterly ashamed of belonging to.

But are Tory voters all bad - no! like everyone they will all have good or bad points to some degree or another but i will always hate the fact they vote Tory and seem to not care about the destruction they are bringing on people. But hating them in this broad sense does not mean i go around in a permanent rage or have any mental health issues!

I personally have met Boris Johnson multiple times - he lived very near the office i used to work in before he was Mayor of London and he shopped in the same local shop and he is without doubt the most polite person i have ever met. But his politics and beliefs are utterly vile and he deserves all the hatred that is thrown his way.

Would i be friends with a Tory voter - i doubt it i simply cannot see what we would have in common but of course i meet them daily during my work and normal life and i do not go around spitting on them but can be polite.

I mean i never smacked the shop door into Boris's face! But maybe if i knew then what i know now i would have!

@BigHeartyTruffle

It’s not just about opinions though is it - the way people vote is an expression of their morals and values. While I would never hate anyone for disagreeing with me, I do have to question the values of people who (e.g.) vote for a party that presides over massive cuts to welfare. And to be honest this does make me inclined to dislike them.

My exact thoughts !

Its funny how in aome quarters its acceptable to hate tory voters but not vice versa. Am stating this a would be labour voter if only they didnt hate womens rights or even if they knew what a woman was in a real and legal terms

@Narutocrazyfox

Reading your post is very sad OP. It's a very unreasonable mindset to hate someone because they disagree with you. When it comes to politics nothing is black and white - people voted to leave the EU for wildly different reasons. I avoid talking about politics with people if I can, but when I do I try to understand their views and why they may feel the way they do.

Hate is never the answer.

This absolutely. There are people out there who have extreme political views (nobody I know) and no I couldn't be friendly with them, although if it was somebody like a neighbour, I would try my hardest to stay polite. Actually apart from passing comments or humour, I don't discuss politics. I take voting seriously and do my research before I vote but I don't discuss it...I mean why would I? I am not in the business of trying to alter people's views and I don't want to spend my social time with people who want to alter mine. I certainly don't ask or tell people who I voted for.

Unless it's genuinely extreme, evil politics then of course it's nuts to literally hate someone just based on how they vote.

I find it painfully ironic that people who do openly "hate" often seem to preach about how nasty the other side is!

@MarshaBradyo

a person who is obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices.

This sounds quite close to me. Certainly not flexible or open to difference. Up for debate I’d say on whether it qualifies.

I dont think it does if its backed up by research I.E flat earthers yeah theres no evidence for that even in the middle ages people knew the earth was round that is a scientific fact.

same with brexit if you listened to economists, financial experts, export companies etc who said hell no this is insane thats informed opinion not bigotry, bigotry is listening to and forming your opinions from the comfortable lies from people like farage and Johnson not the uncomfortable truths of experts in the fields affected.