So friend - met through work 10yrs ago - started a new job. I'm self employed. She said she told her employer about me and try wanted to interview me. I said salary is low side - about £30k less than I earned in my last proper job - but OK. Had the interview, my friends on the panel. She asks me a question, I start to think about an answer and she starts answering it for me. I let her finish and then say, yes that's an example but I was thinking about ... and give my example. I'm a bit perturbed. Then she says we'll you did work for me and I say, we reported to different directors, my director was an exec and your directors boss. They tell me they're going to make me a job offer. I catch up with my fried for lunch with another mutual friend. As mains are served she says and you'll be working for me. Our mutual friend says, that's not going to work. Don't ruin your friendship over work. I agree, it won't work as they're going to pay me more than you and in any case it'll get in the way of our friendship. She says we'll I didn't going it would be a problem as you've worked for me before and I tell her politely but straight that I've never worked for her. Finish lunch, me and mural friend are car sharing and she says wtf. I say wtf I'm so pd off. We were the same level but I reportedto an exec director she reported to his direct report how could I have worked for her. Well it seems that's what she told them. Someone a couple of years earlier said to me that I'd worked for her and I put them right. So how long has been saying this? I've always been on a higher salary than her and outside of consultancy held more senior roles than her. Anyway I told her to correct it cos it wasn't untenible otherwise and she aired me for 5 days, so I told her to do one. Our mutual friend said I'm being reasonable, she's obviously upset and I found myself a great contract so all's good workwise, but she's fd up my options with that consultancy now and has clearly been somehow using me to big herself up at work. I feel bad cos she lost her daughter 2 years ago and her mum's just died too. I don't know she has many friends who are balanced and reasonable like me, but she crossed a line imo. First time I've cut a friend off in my life. What do you think? AIBU?
AIBU?
AIBU - she told her employer I'd worked for her
Dibbydoos · 19/09/2021 18:46
Am I being unreasonable?
583 votes. Final results.
POLLOP I think you’re not being unreasonable to be miffed – it’s pretty weird of your friend. It seems like there’s already a rift there now which might be too awkward to backtrack from, however I’m not sure it’s something I’d end a friendship over. Although obviously that depends on how good a friend they are in the first place.
FWIW I have a degree in linguistics and also write for a living (which includes some paid proofreading). And I often don’t bother following rules when I’m communicating casually, I actually enjoy not bothering all the time, because you know, busman’s holiday n all that. Colloquialisms, dialect, slang, etc. are all perfectly valid, depending on the setting. And as many a linguist will tell you, it’s all about descriptivism rather than prescriptivism any way. 
The smug pedants here are really picking on your message in a way that anyone properly involved in language would be far less likely to. Trying to score internet points on grammar went out around the same time as msn messenger.
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