to think there is an inverse relationship between how little money people have and how much they are willing to spend on presents for their children

[Twiglett]

am truly gobsmacked at some of the things that people I know are buying for their children

truly and utterly, spoilt bastard, gobsmacked

why spend that much money? why?

Good post Expat!

Perhaps Twigs will come back and tell us what her definition of spoilt is for a child brought up on benefits?

He's not the only one. The borders is quite a deprived area, there will be plenty of kids having a shit Christmas, more than I can sanely think about.

Soapy I'll have a think and get back to you on that. I reckon I can slip summat into his bag.

I am just so glad this has changed from the judgemental smugfest it was earlier on. I had to delete most of my post I was so angry.

I can see why, Tamum!

Honestly some folks need a dose of the holiday spirit!

Put on 'The Secret Millionnaire', fgs.

Feel a little joy!

There was an enormous hoo-hah over here recently about a child who was allegedly taken out of kindergarten because the money was needed to pay the instalments for the dad's new plasma TV. The family (on benefits) took part in a TV documentary and the child was filmed looking in at the kindergarten fence and crying.

This sort of (surely exceptional) story is much beloved of the media here atm. I believe it is to do with a desire to portray people on benefits (specifically long-term unemployment benefit, which has just been reformed to the detriment of the claimants) as feckless in order to gloss over a general unease in society at these reforms and at how quickly anyone losing their job can now end up in the same position.

OTOH I do think expensive items simulate, for some people, a sense of 'belonging' to a society circumstances (e.g. unemployment) have excluded them from participating in fully.

okay, so having read the thread I think you are probably right to think that there is an inverse relationship...

Clearly many people on low incomes do the 'gold-plated wii' thing whereas people who are 'comfortable' do the 'DC are sharing a rubber-band ball and a half-eaten biscuit' thing

FWIW I don't lke that people feel pressured - either way - to buy or not buy.

True...as the (feckless!) long term unemployed, our kids do not have day trips, holidays, a bedroom of their own, etc etc.

Not that all employed people do have those things.

Quite, expat. It's all so lacking in warmth and any sense of seasonal spirit. People have to be able to decide for themselves- it depends on the child, the parent, the financial situation, and why the need to judge people who don't follow the "MN" way?

To be fair, Twigs is alright. Sometimes you say stuff, you kinda know it's not right once you've said it. We've all thought stuff that's not pc, we've all judged. Trouble on Mumsnet is that once you've said it, you can't take it back.

Bring back Charles Dickens

Do i follow the MN way? I hope not...me dear old ma said i was definately a goat, not a sheep, and as such, i will be seperated at the time of judgement. Is the MN way the sheep way or the goat way?

I really like Twig, and she knows I do, but I don't have to like this thread, and she was far, far from being alone in these views so I wasn't really addressing this to her, particularly.

Godzilla, it's the armadillo's way.

MerryKerry I couldn't agree more! She was very very rude to say that! I do find Rhubarb so very common at times. Stupid person. I particularly liked the soft play area they erected on Phoenix Nights that time, do you remember? Soft play areas are just great! 'Specially those near pubs.

Oh yeah - that's another thing we can't afford! Well, i guess we could, if we didn't buy them any Nintendo games Given the choice, they I prefer to buy them each a game which will occupy spare snippets of time in the evenings for a few months, than a party that will last the day and then be over.

They used to like soft play areas at other people's parties though!

Cliff I am reporting your post for being offensive to Roobs

Was it?

She sucks! Comes from Oldham ffs, course she's common!