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Original poster

Applying for a new job while pregnant

298 replies

Traveller3367 · 16/09/2021 20:11

7 months pregnant
Saw a job that I thought I would be good at
Applied without mentioning I was pregnant
Been offered the role and have informed employer I am pregnant and due to go on mat leave soon
They will see if they can get cover but I have offered to decline the position if they cannot.
My question is was I being unreasonable in applying in the first place?
(Ps I wasn't hiding my pregnancy. I didn't know when was best to mention it. Didn't want employer to think I was using it against them if they declined me. Also I valued the chance to network and get some interview practice. Was not expecting to get the role as a big jump for me career wise)

OP posts:
MyPatronusIsACat · 16/09/2021 20:52

Three quarters of people voting think the OP is being unreasonable.

I rest my case.

burritofan · 16/09/2021 20:52

I can't believe what I just read! Confused What an utterly ludicrous analogy!
It’s the direct, logical analogy. Pregnancy involves 2 people (yes, yes, it can be done solo but you still need the sperm or the womb, let’s not get into that). Men can merrily apply for jobs up to the due date, take two weeks off, merrily carry on applying for jobs. Women have every right to apply for jobs right up until they’re fucking crowning, tbh. It’s much much harder to get them, of course, what with (a) the pregnancy generally being quite obvious from the minute they walk into the interview, and (b) antediluvian attitudes like yours.

Pollypudding · 16/09/2021 20:52

YANBU- if you are the right person for the job (which you proved in the interview) then your employer will hopefully take the long view. Congratulations on your pregnancy and your new job!

Pollypudding · 16/09/2021 20:58

That is a depressing vote- just to add I have appointed staff who are pregnant and once appointed someone who had just started their maternity leave.

MotherofPearl · 16/09/2021 20:58

I despair of some of the attitudes on here.

You have done nothing wrong in applying for the job OP. I hope you accept the offer.

Many years ago I found out I was pregnant two days before a job interview. I attended the interview and did not mention it. I got the job and informed my manager when I was about 3 or 4 months pregnant. I felt wracked with nerves and guilt, but looking back I really shouldn't have done. I've stayed in that job ever since, and like to think I've made a contribution.

Try not to doubt yourself on this.

ReeseWitherfork · 16/09/2021 20:58

Don't feel guilty. Especially if it's quite a senior position. Those sort of jobs don't come up that often. And if you're the right candidate then they should be happy to have you regardless. What if you got ill or had an op and needed time off just after starting? Not to mention the fact that we hire plenty of people (usually senior management!) who leave soon after starting because the job isn't just right for them - at least in this scenario they know you'd be coming back.

MyPatronusIsACat · 16/09/2021 20:59

@burritofan Nope. Still a ludicrous analogy! You cannot compare a woman who is 7 months pregnant (and is applying for a job,) to a man who is with a woman who is 7 months pregnant, (and is applying for a job...)

The situation is COMPLETELY different.

There is no point in even trying to debate with someone who comes out with such tripe as you are spouting.

ReeseWitherfork · 16/09/2021 21:02

The situation is COMPLETELY different.
It's not completely different, considering a new dad could ask for shared parental leave and take a considerable amount of time off. Assuming the 'considerable amount of time off' is your main argument for why the situation would be different for a perspective mother versus father.

Albgo · 16/09/2021 21:05

@Mantlemoose

Why would you waste anyones time by doing this? Don't offer to decline if they can't get anyone else. Just do the right thing and decline. I'm pretty sure I'll be in the minority but IMO its silliness like this that makes a mockery of woman's rights.
@Mantlemoose this is a disgusting opinion. Women are allowed to apply for jobs whenever they bloody well like.
Futurecatmum2 · 16/09/2021 21:06

Christ alive, the misogyny on this thread is unreal. Are these posters envious of the OP's success, I wonder?

YANBU in the slightest OP. I work for a famous institution and two of our very senior execs were hired while pregnant. They're both incredibly capable, smart women who were simply hired because they were the best people for the job. Anyway, they both had their inductions and spent a few weeks/months in the job before going on mat leave. Someone else was hired/seconded in the interim, then when they returned they hit the ground running and have now both been there for years. One has gone on to have another baby, and both remain highly respected colleagues.

Ignore the dinosaurs who'd have you chained to the kitchen sink, OP. Congratulations on baby and job offer!

burritofan · 16/09/2021 21:06

There is no point in even trying to debate with someone who comes out with such tripe as you are spouting.
Try throwing in a Hmm and a Confused, it seems to help your debating style.

Do you really see nothing in common between a pregnant woman and a man whose partner is pregnant? They’re both about to be, say it with me, p a r e n t s. Both of them! And equal in law! Astonishing but true. Here’s where you boggle: Confused.

Albgo · 16/09/2021 21:08

@Hiphopopotamus

I can’t quite believe what I’ve read here. Attitudes like this are why women struggle in the workplace. The OP is the best person for the job - if she takes her maternity leave and returns she could stay for the next twenty years. Maternity leave is a legal right because of attitudes like this.
Yes, exactly @Hiphopopotamus the responses to this thread are so disheartening, particularly so because I'm assuming most of them are from women.
imsorryihaventaclue · 16/09/2021 21:11

Pretty disappointing to read some of these comments. I work for a large organisation and we would hire the best person for the job. If they were pregnant, we’d make a plan to cover the maternity leave. Have done this several times.

PurplePizzaCake · 16/09/2021 21:14

To the people who think the OP is being unreasonable... At what point in pregnancy would you think it appropriate to apply for a job? I'm early days pregnant... Would I be allowed to apply for a new job? How about a couple hoping to adopt?

ReeseWitherfork · 16/09/2021 21:14

It's no less convenient for a company to sort mat cover for a new starter than it is an established employer. But perhaps some of the previous posters generally don't think that anyone procreating should be in the workforce.

Crankley · 16/09/2021 21:15

@MyPatronusIsACat
Wow I'm glad I don't work for you.

I'm sure the feeling is reciprocated.

Things are somewhat different from when I used to recruit, when all interviews were held in the office. No way I would have hired you at 7 months pregnant and I totally agree with MyPatronusIsACat

fruitandflowers · 16/09/2021 21:18

Yikes some real dinosaurs on this thread

With shared parental leave men with pregnant wives are just as much of a “threat” as women as they might take off big chunks of time.

Just hire the best person for the job and crack on with it. You’ve even got a whole pool of applicants to offer the mat cover too without starting again :)

(For context, I am a v senior exec in a big company and we wouldn’t worry about a woman being pregnant at interview at all)

PooWillyNameChange · 16/09/2021 21:19

Take the job if you want it. My notice period is 3 months. It's just like a very delayed start.

MissSmith80 · 16/09/2021 21:21

When I was 7 months pregnant I was asked to apply for a role - I can only imagine my face when the recruiting manager contacted me to tell me that they'd really like me to apply. I think I actually said, ' you do realise that I'm going on maternity leave in 6 weeks time?' Yes, they did but they knew that I would do a good job and if I had been successful, they would have waited and come up with a plan to cover the role until I returned.
I didn't apply because I wasn't sure that I'd want to come back to work into a role that I'd never done before (and wasn't sure that it was the right role for me anyway).
So despite what some are say, not all employers rule out recruiting a heavily pregnant person. Good luck OP.

Ashitaka · 16/09/2021 21:23

[quote Traveller3367]@CrushedPistachios
Start date next month
I'd be able to work 2 months then hoping 6 months off then back to work[/quote]
I started a new job 2 weeks ago and they were happy to hire me

So you started a job, where they were expecting you to go on mat leave and return, and instead you're leaving to go to a different role?

That's a bit shitty! If I have read it right?

gogohm · 16/09/2021 21:24

Yabu employers are hiring because they need someone to do a job now, not in a years time. If you are 6 weeks pregnant fair enough to apply but at 7 months unless you aren't planning on taking more than 2-4 weeks off it's unreasonable to apply

AhNowTed · 16/09/2021 21:27

@gogohm

Yabu employers are hiring because they need someone to do a job now, not in a years time. If you are 6 weeks pregnant fair enough to apply but at 7 months unless you aren't planning on taking more than 2-4 weeks off it's unreasonable to apply

Why?

If a pregnant woman loses her job is she supposed to starve rather than get another one?

Chinam · 16/09/2021 21:27

[quote Traveller3367]@MyPatronusIsACat
Wow I'm glad I don't work for you
This is actually the second position I've been offered while heavily pregnant
I started a new job 2 weeks ago and they were happy to hire me. Including when I told them I planned to have more babies asap.
Some employers are more open minded and inclusive thankfully.
What hope is there for pregnant people when there are employers like you?![/quote]
You started a new job two weeks ago and you’re already looking to move on. Seriously…

burritofan · 16/09/2021 21:28

Luckily the Equality and Human Rights Commission disagrees with the unpleasant throwbacks on this thread.

www.equalityhumanrights.com/en/help-and-support-employees/faqs-employees

Twylar · 16/09/2021 21:31

The absolute sh* people are writing on here.

You have done nothing wrong by succeeding in an interview and taking maternity leave.
Noone should be disadvantaged in their career by having children and literally creating the next workforce and might I add the people who will be paying for the pensions of the employers and all of you idiots making these discriminatory statements. What happened to it takes a village?

Congratulations on your new job.