Seriously thinking my little cat would be happier if I rehomed her

[Coffeetree]

I have an indoor-only cat whom I adopted about two years ago. Her previous owners had to rehome her because their baby had an allergy. When I adopted her I had her checked out by a vet and they found she has a heart murmur. She has absolutely no interest in going outside.

She was a shy little thing when first here. Then during lockdown I worked from home for over a year. She really came out of her shell. Affectionate and playful.

I'm back in the office, out of the house for 12 hours a day most days. And she's a wreck. Meowing her head off when I leave, and weeing on everything.

She has toys and windows galore. She was fine with being alone before lockdown but for some reason now it's clearly distressing her.

The wee is becoming a huge problem, taking a lot of my time and money in cleaning mattresses, duvets, cushions, carpets. I refuse to lock her in the bathroom or kitchen all day. I've tried every trick in the book. Orange peel, feeliway, everything.

There's def no medical problem, it's anxious weeing.

Help?

I mean I have really tried everything. Fresh clean litter all the time. She does her her box, just also wees on cushions etc when I'm gone.

Another kitten 😁 We always kept our animals in 2 at leasts.

On a serious note. If she isn't happy and you aren't happy, sometimes rehoming is the best even if it hurts

What did the vet suggest?

I'd get another cat too.
Or re-home if possible

I would echo another cat.

Our kitten is fine all day if one of her brothers is in. But, if not she's a meowing distressed mess when I get home. Nothing I can do about that as not getting another cat and soon she will be out with them. But in your position I'd get another.

I've thought of getting another kitten! But in my experience adult female cats do not appreciate another cat in the home. Plus my home is only suitable for an indoor-only cat. Hence my adopting her. I'm not sure it would be fair to get a healthy new cat and then confine them indoors.

That's sad and going to be an all to familiar story. Yep another cat or rehome.

I would read up on separation anxiety in cats, as there are certainly some things you can do that would help:

www.petmd.com/cat/conditions/behavioral/can-cats-have-separation-anxiety

Vet said try orange peels and lemon enzyme.

One cushion was literally still damp from my spraying it with orange enzyme and she ped all over it.

My cat wasn't weeing on anything but he completely changed when we got two kittens. They took a while to fully bond but he seems so much happier since we got them. They are very close. He used to cling to me when I got home from work and was very lethargic. I think he used to be lonely. I thought cats were solitary animals but have read quite a lot about how this isn't the case. They honestly are very good for each other. They probably would still need some slow introductions but it may be worth a try. Mine are all indoor too. And two kittens might be worthwhile (!) as they will play together and not annoy your current cat too much when they have their loopy spells! That all might sound like too much of a gamble though!

Only last week I was reading that hundreds of cats are feeling deserted now that their owners are back to working away from home .Apparently the little fur balls have got so used to having human company all day that they have now got detachment issues. He/she is letting you know that they are sad and lonely . If you can't be with her then it might be best to rehome her to someone who doesn't work or an elderly person ,.the cat is making it quite clear they are very unhappy . The other solution is to get another cat to keep her company but this might not work and then you end up with double the trouble . Be kind to yourself put the the cat first .

Our cat is on hills urinary care cat foot due to his anxiety. It's made an absolutely massive difference. I would fully recommend talking to your vet about this as it's completely changed the cat

In a similar situation we got a large dog crate and kitten went in there with rugs etc, food, and a box to snuggle in when we were out/at night.

It is much kinder to give a cat a limited space they can call theirs than to let the run amok in a larger space. She is marking all the time as she is anxious .

Yes re a second cat and they will adapt. And there is no reason a second cat could go outside while the other stays in. Mine vary and are out and in as they wish but one vastly prefers inside.

I was watching an episode of "My Cat from Hell" yesterday where they dealt with separation anxiety in a cat. They basically said this:

• Accidents/mess needs to be cleaned up with a proper pet enzyme spray. You need to absolutely drench the area (use at least twice the recommended amount), let it soak in and dry. I would repeat multiple times if it's somewhere she's peed a lot.
• Lots of litter trays - she should have two anyway, but I would give her a choice of 3/4 trays and put them in the rooms/areas where she's having the most accidents.
• Try leaving the TV or radio on while you're out so there's always background noise.
• A cat tree by the window so she has a good view of outside - and try what Jackson calls "catification" - so make sure there are lots of cat-friendly places for her to sit and hide. You could also try one of those donut beds that are supposed to help with anxious cats.
• Feliway plug-ins can help keep them calm as they release certain pheromones. I would have at least two plugged in at all times.

Getting a second cat could either go really well or it could be a disaster. I have three unrelated indoor cats and they get on just fine, but I know others who have had serious issues (including very, very bad fights) so it's not always the solution.

Rehoming her is best. You can't guarantee she'll be happier with another cat and then you'll have two to cope with.

Don't feel guilty, your circumstances have changed. I would contact a local rescue or Cats protection who will ensure she's adopted by someone suitable.

Thanks. She wees on whatever smells of me. She sometimes wees on me while I'm sleeping. So she's definitely trying to make a point.

It breaks my heart to thinking of rehoming her but it might be the only option.

I've texted the charity and her previous owner for ideas. Her previous owner was heartbroken about giving her up and so we've kept in touch over WhatsApp, with me sending loads of videos. Maybe they can help.

PS worth getting a second opinion from a different vet?

Also cats are NOT solitary creatures...

I'd suggest drowning your house in Feliway. Plus urinary cat food.

While female cats generally take the longest to make friends with a new cat, Silkycat has always had a frenemies relationship with the other cat in her life.

Anyone visiting would think she hates Big Boy but actually when he turns up late she's quite stressed about it and will sometimes go out and fetch him for us. Silkycat also barely moves most of the day and her territory doesn't go beyond the patio while Big Boy is the great explorer.

It's worth trying another younger cat if Feliway and change in cat food doesn't work.

We rehomed our very anxious weeing everywhere cat to an elderly relative who is home most of the time. Cat is very very much happier and the weeing is largely stopped (occasional accidents as opposed to a constant daily battle).

I'd have a consultation with a cat behaviourist as her seeing on you whilst you're asleep sounds extreme

*weeing

Don’t get another cat, you’ll likely only compound the problem.

It is extreme! She's definitely making a statement and getting my attention when she does that. I mean she doesn't have the English language so I'm trying to figure out what she wants to say. I can't quit my job nor go remote.

What’s your vet said? Our cat is a very anxious wee’r too and has huge separation anxiety. As well as a heart murmur and is also an indoor cat!!

Are you able to dedicate one room specifically to her whilst your out? Our vet told us to try this as it can allow her to feel more comfortable knowing that’s “her room”.

I felt a bit mean at first leaving her in there for ages but we have a pet cam and after the first few days she stopped crying and just sleeps. We leave her litter box, dishes, bed and some toys in there too. Then obviously we open the door when we get home and don’t put her in there unless we’re out. Also much easier to spot the wee too. The room we chose for her has tiles too so much easier to disinfect. Before this she was roaming around our house for hours on end ‘searching’ for us and then peeing to comfort herself.

Probably a silly question but is she neutered?

We also use the urinary royal canin as food now (no idea if that helps).