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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I might be getting scammed - again!

119 replies

Judithand · 11/09/2021 13:17

We are doing a huge house renovation and adaption this summer. Our builder recommended a kitchen fitter who came out and gave a quote. The reason I booked him is because he said he would be available.

He asked for 50% deposit in cash and I foolishly paid him.
He kept pushing back the job and eventually just stopped replying. The builder knows his family, and found out he has a drug addiction and has gone missing.

So deposit gone.
I put on social media to find another kitchen fitter for this weekend as we are only waiting for this work before moving home.
As the works were all funded by fundraising and go fund me as my son is disabled it got a lot of traction on social media. I didn’t name the thief but lots of people messaged me knowing who he was and the company he had worked for (family business)

The brother of the scammer contacted the builder, said it looked bad on his business that I was sharing it online. He would come this weekend with his family and fit the kitchen and wardrobes for us.

However it is not the design, spec or colour that we wanted - only what was in stock.

This morning I met the guys at the house and he asked me for 5 grand for the materials and to pay the guys that came to work today.
I didn’t respond just stared at him blankly.

We paid more than 5 grand in deposit. If the materials and labour cost that much then should be not take it up with his brother? Who is not missing at all but in the parents home.
By doing this work and sharing on social media it looks like they’ve done the job for free

So
AIBU - yes just pay for what you got today and deal with scammer later
No - brother should be taking some money from the thief as he knows where he is.

OP posts:
TheChiefJo · 11/09/2021 19:12

@SequinsandStiIettos

You paid a 50% deposit of £7k in cash, the total cost was £14k, and they have asked you for 5k? So you get a 2k discount for the choice of stock not being your original order.

I would have done what you did in your shoes to recoup what I could and get moved in. It was the right call as long as you can live with the different stock because court time and costs are a pain, because stock is low due to covid, because you are in limbo, because the wait for a builder might be an age.

Hope it works out for you.

What I would do when it is all over is a comment along the lines of:

Thank you for doing what was right. I appreciate the work put in today - it was worth the 5k I paid you this afternoon. Although the kitchen ended up not being the kitchen I had originally ordered, it has cost me 12k rather than 14k, and so we are even and hopefully lessons have been learned.

Something that is not libellous but sums it up.
All the best to you OP Flowers

Definitely do this. Don't let them make out they are heroes.
Original poster
Judithand · 11/09/2021 20:36

Just back from the house. The kitchen that they fitted is nice. It is nothing like what was planned or picked previously but it is a well made kitchen.
As the design has changed I will have to get the electrician back on Monday.

I brought DH with me tonight and the guy did not mention money this time.

To clear things up - I was quoted 14500 - I paid 7250 cash.
Brother called and said he’d get me a kitchen to get us into the house ASAP - I had to buy all appliances myself (they were included in the original quote)

There is a lot of negativity towards GoFundMe on this site? Thankfully it’s not something that I’ve experienced while fundraising this last year.

I bought my home as a family home in a lovely area. When my son was born sick we realised the house was unsuitable for his future needs. However I had to leave my high paying job to become a carer as he needs 24 hour care. We could not remortgage as my husbands salary was considered even too low for our current mortgage. We couldn’t sell as we wouldn’t get a new mortgage worth buying a home with. We spent a year in ICU so flew through our savings.
Our home was not wheelchair accessible at all. Our son could not move from room to room. It was like a prison. We changed our living room to his bedroom, kitchen to his wet room and had to build an extension to hold the new kitchen area.
I didn’t want to fundraise. I want a normal life. I am benefiting nothing from these adaptions except that I can now have more nursing as the house layout is more practical.

OP posts:
SequinsandStiIettos · 11/09/2021 21:01

they were included in the original quote
Ah that changes things slightly. So the 2k may not have been a discount but rather subtraction of white goods. In fairness, you still owe the workmen today for labour. A fully-fitted kitchen, even not your spec, is unlikely to be 7250 cash. Am sure others will tell you to make him whistle/chase you for it but nor is it his fault his brother is an addict. If it comes to it, I would be paying 2750 and making it a round 10k which includes a discount as well as subtraction of appliances.

Original poster
Judithand · 11/09/2021 21:13

@SequinsandStiIettos I agree that 10 would be fair for what was fitted today and the work

OP posts:
callmeadoctor · 12/09/2021 00:16

Surely you have had council funding for disabled adaptations? (max 30 grand at mo)

callmeadoctor · 12/09/2021 00:17

I only know this as we have just been through this experience.

NavigatingAdolescence · 12/09/2021 09:34

@callmeadoctor

Surely you have had council funding for disabled adaptations? (max 30 grand at mo)
OP’s 3rd post says they had a grant.
callmeadoctor · 12/09/2021 13:42

Ah, thankyou NavigatingAdolescence

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 12/09/2021 14:18

Did you consider staying in your high paying role and your husband doing the caring as his role is low paying?

DeletedByAccident · 12/09/2021 14:37

@MrsElijahMikaelson1

Did you consider staying in your high paying role and your husband doing the caring as his role is low paying?
WTF?

I imagine OP & DH had lots of difficult discussions whilst their child spent a year in hospital.
This is no ones business but theirs.

Tulips15 · 12/09/2021 15:12

I wouldnt pay a thing.
Youve given the company a good deposit.
They should recoup that from awol brother.

TheChiefJo · 12/09/2021 15:19

@MrsElijahMikaelson1

Did you consider staying in your high paying role and your husband doing the caring as his role is low paying?
Imagine thinking this won't have occurred to OP as a possibility Hmm
Antinerak · 12/09/2021 15:34

Did you seriously let the same cowboy builder company come back and take more money and do more work? You're getting scammed again, obviously.

Twinsmum2003 · 12/09/2021 17:13

Erm, sue the first guy!

Roxy69 · 12/09/2021 18:06

@icelolly12

This was funded by go fund me? You need to be more careful with other peoples money. I'd be fuming if I contributed and it had 'gone missing' and think you were the scammer tbh
Correct.
Lennybenny · 12/09/2021 18:27

So you paid cash....red flag. Receipt?
You allowed the brother of the scammer to do the work without seeing the new kitchen parts?
You haven't put on sm that you were scammed and the brother is trying to shake you down without admitting brothers guilt?
Police are NOT involved?
You funded through bloody gofundme.
You paid £7250 so you still have £7250 left....thats now not going towards kitchen so will you refund some of the gofundme as the house is complete?

funkydoryjewellery · 12/09/2021 18:30

You need to write on the Instagram page ‘save the day 😂 hardly it was your brother who scammed me & now you are asking me for more money, seriously !’ And don’t stop writing it till the get lost, I don’t mean to sound harsh but I think if they money had been yours maybe you wouldn’t have been naive & certainly wouldn’t be doing it again !!!

notoldjustpastyoung · 12/09/2021 18:33

Never ever pay for anything in advance. If a builder can't fund his first few days on the job, he can't be a very busy builder. Don't pay another penny and if you've paid out a lot, sue.

Tigger1895 · 12/09/2021 19:12

@Judithand

I haven’t paid any money today - he told me that it was stock they had in the warehouse and the family would come today ‘to save the day’ that’s what is on the Instagram page

Money was only asked for this morning. They are there working now.

I wouldn’t want anyone out of pocket and would pay for what we got BUT it just feels so wrong. He stole from a GoFundMe but isn’t going to pay the consequences

How are they saving the day when it was a family member who caused the issue? Why should you be out of pocket for the behaviour of their family member? They should be bending over backwards to fix the issue. DON’T give them a penny.
Debbacat6 · 12/09/2021 20:56

You need to toughen up, report the theft to the police and have NOTHING to do with the family

Binting · 13/09/2021 07:55

OP, you still haven’t said whether you’ve reported the alleged theft to the police. Have you reported it? You say you know where the thief is hiding out so get it reported.

drpet49 · 13/09/2021 08:36

Amazing that they manage to source a kitchen for you with days notice that managed to fit your kitchen perfectly.

And your happy to pay £10k for a kitchen you never chose.

Scam, scam, scam.

hellcatspangle · 13/09/2021 09:20

I absolutely wouldn't pay them a penny, tell him to ask his brother for the money.

Feelingimpatient · 13/09/2021 15:11

I'm sorry to say this but you have been extremely gullible here. I suspect the 'builder' is deliberately targeting you because of your situation. Do not under any circumstances give him any more money.
I think I would be taking legal action asap.

Original poster
Judithand · 13/09/2021 15:26

Update!

So it looks like it was a scam. New fitter told me today that he has no contact with scammer brother and has no new number for him. I asked him to pass on the message that he had until the end of the day before I went to report the theft, sold on the debt and named him online.
I then got a call from the scammer asking for 2 more days to get the money back.

I have already reported it but I asked them not to act until my kitchen was fitted and to see if they come up with the money back.

OP posts: