Doctors can be arseholes sometimes

[postingfortraffichere]

GP today was a Complete arse and it's left me quite upset.

I requested a repeat prescription for anti depressant and she said am I TTC to which I replied yes.

She then proceeded to tell me that I should suggest going without them so to not harm the potential baby if I do conceive. And that I should try natural methods to improve my mood instead.

I've tried every natural method under the sun for many years, I finally after years of resisting taking anti depressants decided to take the plunge a few weeks ago and have felt like I've got my life back and feel much more positive.

Today has put me on a downer - not only am I struggling TTC but I don't need the gp trying to undo a decision and make me feel guilty for taking anti depressants when I've found them life changing.

Of course I could go without them as that's what I did for many years but I want my quality of life to improving and now I just feel so deflated at the doctors attitude and bluntness and guilt tripping.

She said anti depressants basically should be last resort - so basically I should only use them if TTC if I'm about to top myself?

I'm pissed off and feel shit by this. AIBU to be angry and now not know what to do.

People who commented please at least Google what depression is and its causes.There are many and not all are linked to hormonal imbalances.I wasn't trying to be snarky or condescending.I Truly wish I gotten counselling before I got antidepressants and as someone who did spend couple of years without the will to live I feel it is my duty to offer advise even if it isn't relevant and might not help.Just in case it does...

@CorrBlimeyGG

I’m kind of astonished that you think doctors can hold all the relative risk percentages for the whole gambit of side effects for all the drugs they prescribe.

If they don't know, then they should look it up, rather than giving inaccurate information.

The GP didn't give inaccurate information though, she was honest about saying she didn't know the exact stats (no reasonable person would expect her to)- OP seems to suggest this as further evidence that the GP was useless/bad/an arsehole

Check out BUMPS website OP - best use of medicines in pregnancy

Recommended to me by Consultant when I was very stressed about having to take meds which arent recommended in pregnancy

Summarises studies & gives facts about risks/side effects & facts about the quality of evidence for these drugs etc etc, definitely helped me make an informed decision (I carried on taking the medication)

From the BUMPS website:

How do I know that the information from bumps can be trusted?
All bumps information leaflets are researched and written by the UK Teratology Information Service (UKTIS) team of healthcare professionals and scientists. UKTIS is a publically funded, not-for-profit organisation which has been providing information to healthcare professionals since 1983.
The team of teratology specialists conduct a literature review of all peer-reviewed publications on a given subject. The scientific information identified is then synthesised and condensed to provide an unbiased and factual bumps information leaflet.

Would recommend to everyone & you can search all meds by A-Z

Honestly I think she's just telling you what she has to.
I've been on AD for 6 or so years. Took them when TTC, called when I got my positive test to discuss and she told me the same, increased risk to foetus and heart problems.
It depends which you are taking, mine are a risk to the baby, but there are others that are safe to take in pregnancy. I stopped mine all together, and saw a therapist regularly throughout my pregnancy. It was a struggle, and I started them once ds was born as I have severe and complex mental health which is absolutely necessary to medicate. I could have taken something different whilst being pregnant, however when my meds have been changed In the past I ended up with suicidal thoughts so I chose not to. The gp was fantastic, kept in touch throughout, and relayed with my therapist and consultant. I had a specialist mental health midwife, and I was really taken care of. They are doing what's best for you and future baby, but I do understand why you feel guilty!
There is zero reason to feel guilty. Due to medication, therapy, and regular appointments with medical professionals i am more than capable in my parenting and there are zero concerns around my ability to care for my children. Without going into too much detail, I have PTSD from the birth of my first, severe anxiety and depression stemming from that. I had none of this before my first was born.
Please do speak with them again and explain your feelings, but don't take it to heart. These things are in place to help you. I hope you feel better soon, and talk to someone if you start feeling really down x

Oh I just read it's sertraline - that's the particular AD my gp was completely against, it's my regular medication and it's the most linked with fetal heart complications. There are others you can take, but sertraline does carry a risk.
It is however safer to treat the mother throughout pregnancy as added distress can also cause harm.
Speak to your gp about possibly switching to a different type

@lyntheyresexpeople

Oh I just read it's sertraline - that's the particular AD my gp was completely against, it's my regular medication and it's the most linked with fetal heart complications. There are others you can take, but sertraline does carry a risk. It is however safer to treat the mother throughout pregnancy as added distress can also cause harm. Speak to your gp about possibly switching to a different type

I'm not sure why your GP was against it. I was under a perinatal consultant psychiatrist and mental health team and they, along with the diabetes team, only ever suggested that one.

What if your GP didn’t tell you? Would it make her/him an arsehole if you have side effects?
Some people are soo full of themselves!

This is from NHS UK:
FWIW, OP, I can see why you're upset.

I haven't read the full thread so sorry if I've repeated anything.

Sertraline can be taken in pregnancy, it is one of the more low risk anti-d's. I would use this in conjunction with, most importantly, exercise, outdoor exercise. Also diet, a good sleep routine....when I combined all if these factors along with the ADs, it was much more effective that only meds alone and I got so much more benefit.

I would have a think about what you want, if that is anti depressants, then think about what you want to say and perhaps see a different GP. Bring up the option of changing ADs to one of the more 'pregnancy friendly' ones. Good luck.

The GP was doing her job.

People don't seem to be able to take medical advice these days without seeing it as a personal slight.

Hi OP. It's best not to have antidepressants during the first trimester. I came off mine to conceive and tried to resist going back on them. My pregnancy hormones actually helped and I felt good until the 7-8th month when panic about giving birth set in. So I went back on them then. I would listen to the Dr and try to come off them, at least for the first trimester. If you are struggling later on, you could go back on a low dose.

By contrast to others, I was told that sertraline was the safest to take, esp in latter stages and whilst breastfeeding.

MIND shave some very helpful information that maybe of interest, they may also be able to offer advice and support

www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/antidepressants/antidepressants-in-pregnancy/

I have bipolar and tried to come off all my drugs when conceiving. It was hell because I kept having miscarriages and they were making my state of mind worse. I could have stayed on some of my drugs but I was terrified they were causing my miscarriages.

It was an incredibly difficult time for me.

For all the people saying 'that is the gp's job', I have met some gps who have been extremely judgemental and then gone to obstetricians and psychiatrists who have actively encouraged me to take medication while pregnant.

Make an appt with someone else and discuss your options.

I've know a few people pregnant on antidepressants so I would seek another opinion.

Yes she was insensitive. Really insensitive. Please don't take it to heart op. Also remember mumsnet isn't the most sympathetic place.

I agree with some posters that you shouldn’t have kids until your depression is better. It sounds like your depression is quite serious and unstable. A baby would probably cause it to get worse. I think for the benefit of the child you do need to have a stable parent. And the GP is right in telling you the risks. I am sure that the magnitude of the risk varies depending on which research study you are looking at. She is only a GP, perhaps a psychiatrist would be more able to quote to you the % of risk and studies better.

She sounds really insensitive. The fact that you’ve already tried natural methods should have been taken into account. She should have discussed it in far more detail with you. Ignore some of the people on here, remember some of them think that doctors are never wrong and should never be questioned.

She sounds like a judgemental cow to me. There’s a website called the Bumps which lists almost every medication that could impact on pregnancy.

A lot of medication can’t be tested on pregnant women and unborn children due to ethical issues (looking at you Covid vaccine) so the research is based on very small studies.

Overall, if the benefit to the mother outweighs the risk to the foetus, then medication should continue (or be swapped for one that is deemed “safer”) and it sounds like in your case, the benefit to you from taking the medication would negate any small potential risk to any baby. They would probably just offer you extra monitoring.

Society is especially risk averse when it comes to women and babies.

I say this as a person with bipolar disorder who has continued my medication throughout my 7 months of pregnancy. My baby is much better placed having a mother whose mental health is stable and is able to take care of them rather than an unmedicated chaotic nightmare.

You can also use Google Scholar to look up actual research papers on the medication you’re on and see what is said about it.

@Theworldishard how interesting! Perhaps it's very much down to the particular team you are under. I was offered several alternatives, I had been on sertraline for several years and it was something they were really concerned about!

I don’t think your GP was an arsehole. A good friend of mine was advised to taper off her epilepsy meds during pregnancy if she possibly could. So I do not think this sort of advice is limited to mental health conditions.

You are faced with a very difficult decision. And I really feel for you. But your GP would be failing you and any potential baby not to discuss risks with you. Most medication comes with attendant risks and benefits and we all deserve doctors who will be open and transparent about these.

It is not uncommon for a baby who is born to a mother taking Sertraline once a baby is full term, to experience jitteriness and altered muscle tone for a few days after birth (a bit like withdrawal), sometimes this requires a time in transitional care. My young adult daughter is on a high dose of sertraline. She and I have talked about what she will do if she ever wants to conceive. We would hope her GP would have a similarly frank conversation.

I really wish you well I whatever you decide.

@Peridotty

I agree with some posters that you shouldn’t have kids until your depression is better. It sounds like your depression is quite serious and unstable. A baby would probably cause it to get worse. I think for the benefit of the child you do need to have a stable parent. And the GP is right in telling you the risks. I am sure that the magnitude of the risk varies depending on which research study you are looking at. She is only a GP, perhaps a psychiatrist would be more able to quote to you the % of risk and studies better.

Depression doesn't make you a bad parent.

The OP IS seeking help anyway.

[quote lyntheyresexpeople]@Theworldishard how interesting! Perhaps it's very much down to the particular team you are under. I was offered several alternatives, I had been on sertraline for several years and it was something they were really concerned about! [/quote]
Yeah it must be...how strange.. x

I've not rtft so apologies if I'm just repeating. I had a very similar experience with a gp when I was ttc. I felt so guilty that I did as she suggested and weaned off sertraline (that I had been on for years and was feeling very well on).
Around 16 weeks pregnant I started to have a major relapse ans ended up under the perinatal team, who very much encouraged the use of sertraline as needed . The outcomes for babies of mothers with untreated depression are worse. Also the impact of changing hormones and, later the sleep deficit, can also negatively impact mental health.
Yes for some people exercising or reading a self-help book may be adequate. Other people need medication. Doctors, of all people, should be aware of that

@Theworldishard

**Depression doesn't make you a bad parent

I respectfully disagree, I think depression can make you a bad parent. I have a mother with depression and many people in my family have depression.

This I found from a Canadian mental health website about how to cope with a parent with depression:

www.camh.ca/en/health-info/guides-and-publications/when-a-parent-is-depressed

Why does my Dad act the way he does? How does it feel to be depressed? What goes on in my Mom's head when she is not herself?
Depression causes people to act in ways that are different from how they act normally.
It can be very hard living with a parent who is depressed because that person may do or say things that make children feel bad or confused.
Most children notice that a parent who is depressed is not as available to do thing with them, like playing, talking, or driving them places.
Depression causes many people to be impatient, to be more irritable, and to get angrier than normal. It can also cause someone to feel sad and cry a lot. These reactions from a parent can be very hard on children.
A person with depression may get tired more easily and spend a lot of time in bed.
Sometimes people who are depressed have trouble concentrating.
People with depression may worry a lot more than normal.
Sometimes people who are depressed have a negative attitude about life, or have low self-confidence.