To think I'm useless and will never keep a job that isn't sex work??

[exsexworker]

When I was around 21 I was about to be evicted for non payment of rent and going back to family wasn't really an option so I went into sex work.

I ended up doing it for nearly a decade, then when I was 30 I decided to quit and enter the 'normal' world - I don't mean that as an insult to sex workers by the way it's just how I felt - I was fed up of lying to family and friends and worried about the long term.

Since I quit I've had a few jobs and sadly I was rubbish at every one . I don't know if there is something 'wrong' with me or what.

Care home work - couldn't deal with the emotional side at all.
Cleaning work - they extended my probation period due to me being too slow pace of work, and then let me go.
Cafe work - same as the cleaning.

I'm on benefits just now but that will become not enough to survive on quite soon when my DC goes away to Uni and I have bedroom tax applied and debts.

I am so worried and down about it. I just constantly worry that I won't be able to find a job which I can actually do.

I do not want to go back into sex work, but equally I do need to pay my bills. I've no confidence.

This is not a begging thread btw - I have enough money at the moment. I'm just looking for support and advice.

I don't have the luxury of time to study/retrain or anything like that as I need to be working full time asap.

I can't do any lifting pretty much at all due to health issue.

Can't drive either but could possibly learn.

Pre sex work I did do retail and I was OK at that, but every retail job I've seen advertised is part time hours.

Any advice for someone late 30s with zero experience or qualifications who seems to be shit at everything she tries??

You can chat to the job centre. They can give you advice and point you in the right direction. Although you might end up in a situation where you have to job search for 35 hours a week if you go down that route.

Could you volunteer, get advice from or even work for a charity that supports women involved in sex work? Your personal experience would be invaluable and I know it's common in other work for example care leavers to be recruited into the care system / ex offenders to be recruited to work on justice system.

www.streetlight.uk.com/about-us/

I agree. Your writing style is good. I can almost hear you speaking!

Volunteer for a charity for a few days per week and see if you can get a job there - that's what I did.

See if you can get a part time job, even 4 hours per week in a supermarket or shop. Offer to cover other shifts. Once you've got one job, it's easier to get another one with more hours.

every retail job I've seen advertised is part time hours.

I wouldn’t let that put you off initially. I went for a part time roll and then spent most weeks earning loads more because there was always overtime work available.

Search on line for coursera, futurelearn and Google and Microsoft for free on line courses.
There are excellent career ones there.
For charity work look at do- it.org for opportunities.

They have adult apprenticeships now so you could look into that? Get paid to earn qualifications? They’re designed for women who raised children so were out of employment and for anyone whose job has become obsolete to retrain or anyone older who wants to change careers.
www.findapprenticeships.co.uk/adult-apprenticeships/

This may be a little outing (hopefully not). I do live in the UK, but I don't live in England. Are adult apprenticeships still a possibility?

Of course theres something else ou there for you that you will shine at! Have you tried finding work as a self employed cleaner? High demand were I am. What about ironing? Also, could you take part time as a foot in the door?

Recently I've noticed events caterers are crying out for waiting staff, the wedding industry is working flat out and a lot of former waiters and waitresses have found work elsewhere, so that could be an option as you sound really polite and articulate.
I hope you find something wonderful.

You can rebuild your credit score by signing up to a card like Capital One which I believe includes a service known as Creditwise (free service) where you can check your score at regular intervals and hopefully see it improving.

@Blanca87

Could you not try and volunteer at a local charity organisation that work with ex sex workers or young people that have been targeted for sex work. You have 10 years lived experience of sex work plus care work, sounds like you have a great set of skills for working in the third sector. Maybe google local organisations, contact them and see what volunteering opportunities they have. Most people who have volunteered at my work have ended up with paid employment.

I was going to say exactly the same thing!

@exsexworker

Ah thanks *@Gemini6* !!

I do think fast food would really suit me. I'm not creative, but I'm great at like following processes and I am good at friendly customer service for sure.

Do you think they'd employ me though over younger people they have to pay much less??

The job adverts I look at for fast food have pay scales where they have to pay a much higher wage to 25+.

If I emphasize that I'm fully flexible 24/7 with hours and can change or cover shifts at short notice also, then that might go in my favour. My DC are older now and I don't have much of a social life so any hours work for me.

@exsexworker Yes absolutely, if anything we tend to struggle hiring people that aren't 16-20 and really value life experience and maturity so I'm sure you would be snapped up! Especially with your flexibility- definitely give it a go

uk.indeed.com/m/viewjob?jk=d698955ee0da0f3c&advn=1012357825416017&adid=368308506&ad=-6NYlbfkN0D5rQTctH3TCKveCXf7cB9E88xncQI0EubyVA2bPPGxKmzvoH5ZTthAAzlWXulnGgIJjmrGEz8bN7o-TDYrgqemixl2fW_cPTA3CiaQCuLiRzi9bQDip5ueIYYFAgubwuJlRb_STZxKeLOmZlEpN9HBKEaC-Y6JaiqU369XFvQBl6_yTKy5M4zP8K0ZTS7wFPvGj5yxzyVo0vyMvhzfhwiPn95cTfRGnI4_qYtOJqL_VgEDteDEdoAii3e7M7ndOoo6wYiQQpuYnQHX3H_4y2rBVuESXi6XMAeruYSDIgdsC4IrC10TnqPaPmlXFOh3EE-Z6DZhOHtMyViAgkG6lzi6yMjDoK7L6eTFAwjR9Y2vYKtNhiW_0zFyskaZbMJtJSp3H4_4QuwZMbg3JVAgbFdVVIwaNxamQw-hASRHNdmQ-gkGNmC3ETgl&from=serp&dest=http%3A%2F%2Fuk.indeed.com%2Fjob%2Finbound-customer-service-work-home-d698955ee0da0f3c&desth=6986ed2cab2d06113846e3f8fea916f0&prevUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fuk.indeed.com%2Fm%2Fjobs%3Fq%3DCall%2BCentre%26l%3DHome%2BBased&tk=1ffaj2sv53nn6000&dupclk=1&acatk=1ffaj342nt7p7802&pub=6917c08ec3ecf6012dd26f3773156e870cace3277f6b99df

[quote Boobieboobieboobie]uk.indeed.com/m/viewjob?jk=d698955ee0da0f3c&advn=1012357825416017&adid=368308506&ad=-6NYlbfkN0D5rQTctH3TCKveCXf7cB9E88xncQI0EubyVA2bPPGxKmzvoH5ZTthAAzlWXulnGgIJjmrGEz8bN7o-TDYrgqemixl2fW_cPTA3CiaQCuLiRzi9bQDip5ueIYYFAgubwuJlRb_STZxKeLOmZlEpN9HBKEaC-Y6JaiqU369XFvQBl6_yTKy5M4zP8K0ZTS7wFPvGj5yxzyVo0vyMvhzfhwiPn95cTfRGnI4_qYtOJqL_VgEDteDEdoAii3e7M7ndOoo6wYiQQpuYnQHX3H_4y2rBVuESXi6XMAeruYSDIgdsC4IrC10TnqPaPmlXFOh3EE-Z6DZhOHtMyViAgkG6lzi6yMjDoK7L6eTFAwjR9Y2vYKtNhiW_0zFyskaZbMJtJSp3H4_4QuwZMbg3JVAgbFdVVIwaNxamQw-hASRHNdmQ-gkGNmC3ETgl&from=serp&dest=http%3A%2F%2Fuk.indeed.com%2Fjob%2Finbound-customer-service-work-home-d698955ee0da0f3c&desth=6986ed2cab2d06113846e3f8fea916f0&prevUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fuk.indeed.com%2Fm%2Fjobs%3Fq%3DCall%2BCentre%26l%3DHome%2BBased&tk=1ffaj2sv53nn6000&dupclk=1&acatk=1ffaj342nt7p7802&pub=6917c08ec3ecf6012dd26f3773156e870cace3277f6b99df[/quote]
This looks hood

Thanks I will apply for that.

[quote exsexworker]@HavelockVetinari

Thanks very much. I will look at that link now. I wasn't aware that apprenticeships were open to people my age. Would an awful credit score be an issue with civil service?

@Paperplain Thanks! That's strange, because I think my writing style is awful![/quote]
Scotland and Wales definitely have apprenticeships, I'm not sure about NI.

A bad credit score is no problem, there are a limited few jobs you couldn't do, but as an admin apprentice you'd not be doing DV-clearance level work anyway.

@exsexworker

Thanks I will apply for that.

Perfect

If an in bound call centre would suit you. I was given a job with one a few years ago with absolutely no prior experience. The other candidate at the interview with me had absolutely zero customer service experience either and we both got the job. They train you up on the job so you don't have to worry about skills as long as you can use a phone and send an email.

If you try indeed and search for companies like Capita and Blue arrow, they are agencies that recruit and train call centre staff for other companies. I was given a permanent contract with the company after 6 weeks of being employed by the agency. They were always desperate for staff too, especially on the run up to Christmas.

Get yourself an entry level admin role. Over time you will be able to work your way up the company.

there are other jobs in social care that aren't in care homes. Lots of work in the voluntary sector, women's services etc where your lived experience will be important.

Loads of great advice here. I used to work for the National Career service until they moved a few years ago. Their service is free and very useful national career service.gov.uk The site is a bit more difficult to look through than it used to be. But it’s a free service, I’d start by contacting them to find out how they could help you discover things you could do. It may take a few contacts to create a plan. Loads of info on the site but can take time to navigate.
Loads of free short courses out there to improve skills, gain new skills. I found lots of people knew what they were bad at, but that’s a great starting point. Some said they weren’t very chatty, but not all jobs need someone like this. We all have strengths and abilities which are hidden away, that’s what I enjoyed about the job helping someone discover there’s.