Just started looking round at childminders locally and it's the first time I've done this. A genuine AIBU to be surprised / shocked by these practices?
For context children are aged from 12 months up to 5 years.
- children sleep on a plastic crashmat on the floor all piled in together. No blankets, no cots for tiny ones, no curtains in the room. This room is also used for soft play. Is this normal practice?
- meals are always dahl and bread. Always vegetarian and lentil based, some variation on the dahl recipe. This is because so many children have different dietary requirements, so its easier. If parents wish child to eat something else eg chicken or vegetables they have to provide those already prepared.
- there are no high chairs available for very young children at meals. They eat in the floor or if they can manage sitting in a small chair.
- nap time is the same for every child regardless of age or routine at home.
- childminder says she will often tell children that they love them and this is healthy because of how close she is with the children.
AIBU to be surprised by these or is it normal?
How many childminders have you been to see? I’d be very surprised that they were all the same, following this kind of setting As it sounds unusual?
It is a nightmare trying to please very one food wise. At the moment, I’ve got one who refuses any kind of fruit or veg and it’s a battle to get her to eat any kind of protein as all she wants is crisps and biscuits and a bottle of fizzy pop and another who at home is fed really lovely dinners, with a completely lovely variety of what I consider unusual fruit and veg. If she has found something everyone eats and the parents are happy, that’s fine (although ideally there should be A lot more variety).
Napping on mats, again, it’s not for me, but if parents are happy and the children are napping If they want to, that’s the most important thing. I try to get all my children to nap at the same time if possible. We go out in the morning, so it fits for everyone to have a nap after lunch. Is it a cultural thing that the children sit on the floor to eat? Again it’s unusual but if it works for them?
I’ve had children who tell me they love me every day. I respond that I love them too. It’s never really crossed my mind to tell parents that I say it back, but it’s kind of hurtful if you tell someone you love them and they don’t say it back. I don’t initiate that though, it comes from the child. And some never tell me, which is fine, they still get hugs and cuddles when they want them.
Please go and see some other childminders in your area and hopefully one of them will be a better fit with how you want to raise your dc.