To ask what was the most prolific thing you have done to change your life for the better?

[Dotdotlineline]

I'm in a bit of a funk today so want to know what other people do when faced with an idea of changing something.

Has anyone ever made a drastic or even a small change for the better? Whether that be spiritually / money wise or with themselves?

I keep thinking about the notion that 'life is what you make of it' and questioning where I am going wrong.

The pivotal point for all the profound changes happened when i told my ex we were separating years ago-he almost broke me with what is commonly called gaslighting now but at the time,of course-i thought (it was all me&)why did i make him so unhappy&how could i change my behaviour..in the 15years that followed getting shot i have set up2businesses,sold one&maintain the other,travelled the world with my2kids&paid off mortgage.My kids are now teens&we are settled(for now!)in Qld.Australia has afforded us with many opportunities that wouldnt have existed elsewhere-so perhaps the most prolific thing of all was emigrating here in the first place🙂

@Moonlight1972

I have learned to not eat emotionaly anymore and lost a lot of weight and earn a great relationship with food. I have given up alcohol and life is so much more beautiful without it

@Moonlight1972 would you feel comfortable sharing how you did this?

@Nilbog I have tried all the diets under the sun and failed at all them because these diets never addressed my problems ; I comfort eat, I happy eat, I sad eat, I bored eat..so even when I reached target, I never stayed at target long because I cant do willpower for very long, I don’t have it in me and I have always been an emotional eater so I stop dieting and tackled my emotional eating. I have listened to Free from the diet cycle podcast by Paul Wistuba and it finally cliqued !! Give it a go !!

Thanks for sharing @Moonlight1972, I’ll try it!

Stopped smoking
Stopped drinking
Dumped abusive ex
Dumped toxic friends
Currently in planning stages of leaving stressful job for something hopefully more satisfying
Enjoying gratitude and the simpler things in life

Ignore the rude posters, Dotdotlineline, Your thread is thought provoking to those of us feeling stuck in life. Reading what the other posters have done especially at older ages makes me realise I can be more positive about doing what i need to do to sort out my life and persist. so thanks.

I started doing the Miracle Morning. I've adapted it quite a bit from the book, but I make sure I wake up at least an hour before DH and DS and I do things for myself.

A run/walk, nice peaceful coffee and read a book for half an hour every day. It really helps me to cope and I find I'm much calmer with DS and at work as a consequence.

Had 18 years of therapy!
Gave up drugs and alcohol
Stopped being so codependent with DH
Worked full time and went to uni, got a great career
Started running marathons
Started a regular meditation practice and regular silent retreats

DH and I are traveling around the world now for a few years, working and running up mountains as we go. My life feels like a holiday a lot of the time. Never ever predicted it would be this good.

Basically 18 years of hard work in every sphere of life. But so worth it

I've noticed that a few people give credit to therapy for changing their life. Is this therapy that you sought out and paid for yourself?

Could anyone share how they went about finding a therapist, how many sessions and appropriate cost please?

@Window1

I've noticed that a few people give credit to therapy for changing their life. Is this therapy that you sought out and paid for yourself?

Could anyone share how they went about finding a therapist, how many sessions and appropriate cost please?

Do you have an employee assistance scheme through work?

I don't think so.

There are lots of charities which offer reduced cost Counselling sessions. Make sure your therapist is on the BACP register or the UKCP and that they have a few years experience minimum. Most good counsellors offer a free meet up session to see if you ‘click’ before committing.

Left my ex after 10 years of supporting him financially and emotionally for no return. Had to start again and rebuild a home with my son but we are fine .

Six sessions of therapy with a psychologist specialising in birth trauma following the birth of my son. I was stuck and it helped me move forward.

Therapy for me as well. Found a counsellor I liked through the BACP site linked above. I’d had it on and off for years, short NHS courses and a few other private therapists. This time though, I went with no particular immediate concerns or crisis. And I’ve been with her for three years now, making some huge changes (work) but also lots of little ones.
I regularly explore parenting issues with her, which helps, and also complicated relationship things which is helping to keep my marriage going. Whether or not I choose to continue with this will depend on lots of things, but with the support of the therapist I know I’ll make the right decisions.
Also ADHD diagnosis and meds.

Learned to swim.

Gateway to fitness, exercise and far better mental health

I moved to a different continent!

Emigrated to Sweden. It's given us a quality of life we could only dream of in the UK.

Found the mental strength to walk out on my parents cult and leave my entire life behind at 21.

Beyond that education all the way.

Got divorced. It was like a weight lifted off me.
Started making choices about my life and my surroundings that my ex-H wouldn’t have approved of.
Got a dog (the puppy stage was HARD though)
Changed job when the last one really got me down

This is a really timely post, so I’m reading with interest. Thank you

@FatCatThinCat oooh, have you thought about doing an AMA? Very interested in the differences!

Realising that if I want to be successful I have to go and do it myself and stop waiting for opportunities to land on my lap. It involved big risks, hard work and sacrifice but I cannot believe what I have achieved just by changing my attitude.

Divorce
Getting finances under control
Going to bed at the same time every day
Getting a puppy
Not drinking on a "school" night

Life isn't perfect and I'm reading this thread with interest but these things have all made a significant positive difference

Got divorced