AIBU - to want more menopause success stories ?

[MamaNorth]

It's great we are now discussing the menopause more. But it's all doom and gloom. Those who 'sailed through' are generally told to shut up.

So BOAST TO ME about how you sailed through the meno, and why you think you did?

I'm 47 without any signs so far.......

I already do daily exercise, meditate, eat low carb, take vits. I drink too much but am trying to cut back.
Anything else I should add now?

I didn’t change my diet. I drink tea, coffee, gin and wine. I changed all my clothes to cotton. I bought a few fans. I refused to let it take over my life. I just ignored it. I was thrilled that my periods stopped. I sailed through puberty and I sailed through the menopause.

Anything else I should add now?

Who knows... I'm almost 54 & haven't had any (peri)meno. Genetics or exercise-heavy lifestyle? My mother turned into a little old lady overnight at about age 50 but didn't otherwise mention menopause.

When MNers list (peri)menop symptoms they are incredibly vague symptoms that most the population experience at some point. Maybe they all enjoyed robustly hugely perfect health until a sudden change. DH has most the same symptoms as he gets older. I had a lot of the same things when I was in my 20s.

Definite Not boasting, but am thinking that people attribute every little sign of aging to (peri)menopause. It's not like a specific syndrome. So what would there be to boast about, since not a specific thing that was avoided.

53 and going through it. No major problems and sailing through just as my mother did.

I'm trying to sail through the meno but I appear to have boarded Titanic! Reading with interest for tips.

I absolutely sailed through. No hot flushes, no sweats, no emotional upsets. Just one month I had a period, the next a very scanty one and that was the lot. Barely noticeable.

My mum was the same and I have heard it said that if you mum had an easy time of it, chances are you will too. No idea if it's true or a total old wives tale.

I would say I have always been sporty, eaten sensibly and I don't drink or smoke. No idea if that helped or not.

I really didn’t sail through, so I started taking using Ostrogel plus I have a coil and then it was lovely calm sailing for me.

Hi OP, I'm not sailing through neither am I on the Titanic. I am coping AT THE MOMENT BUT I can't help thinking there has to better than this. My symptoms are sometimes a big deal to me (loss of libido and insomnia in particular) but other women may not feel the way with exactly the same symptoms - it depends on so many things really. I didn't have a great experience when approaching my GP so very much of the 'putting up and it could be worse' mindset.

ADreadedSunnyDay try your GP again, there’s so much help available if you need and want it. I suffered for a couple of years before seeking help.

60 now and 5 years post menopause. Irritating flooding early on, bit flushy but otherwise fine. My Mum had a hard time and did HRT; I don't have a particularly healthy lifestyle though don't smoke,so tend to think it's been blind luck not anything I can say 'works'.

Me me me had my last child at 42 , periods got gradually less painful and lighter over the years... missed one at 48.
Missed another at 49
Just before my 50th I had a longish period
And then nothing! So I'm now 6 months in and feel great.
No pmt, no sweats, no hot flushes, no rage.

I did feel a bit warmer at night in the last 2 years but I always one of those constantly freezing people so it was quite nice to be a bit warmer at night.

I have been looking forward to this since I started my periods at 12

I drink, smoke and eat well with moderate exercise in the form of walking . That's it

Well I had a year of NOT sailing through, then I went to the GP and got some lovely hormones and now I am sailing through like Duran Duran on the Rio, frankly. I absolutely count myself as a menopause 'success story'. God bless science.

To be honest I'm now finding this whole obsession with the menopause in the media a bit of a PITA. Although I'm glad people can talk about it I actually find I sometimes wish they'd shut up about it a bit.

I have a colleague who is going through it who talks about nothing else and she assumes all other women of the same age are similarly obsessed. She recently said to me in a professional meeting in front other colleagues "it must just be your menopause hormones". I was a bit .

Because a lot of high profile woman are turning it into a career its assumed that everyone want to shout it from the rooftops and bang on about it endlessly over drinks with female friends. Well I don't.

Maybe its a cop-out but I don't want younger colleagues -- particular male ones - thinking I'm incapable of doing my job because my periods have stopped (I'm not). I don't want to endlessly have to discuss hot flushes and night sweats. And most of all I don't want to feel that other people have decided I've reached the end of my useful life as a woman.

So thanks Davina and Mariella but I'm not talking about my menopause.

Well I am 53 and still have a period every bloody month and zero sign of menopause bar losing a word once or twice a month ( is that even a symptom or am I just looking for something - nay anything - that might say the end is nigh?).
I have been doing this for nearly 40 years now so surely I should be done?

My GP thinks I am peri due to changes to my periods, night sweats and poor sleep, I have been told I can start HRT if I want. I have instead tried to look at other ways to manage. I take menopace and sage tablets (my night sweats are awful) I am cutting down on alcohol/caffeine and exercising more including weights. I want to look after my bones and heart. I do feel better for these changes.

It is hard to say whether it is just age or the menopause. I do feel that HRT is pushed as the answer to all and something we should all be doing. It is great to hear some positive stories as it is all so negative.

I’m pleased that you started this thread, OP, because I’m sick of hearing stories of doom and woe about the menopause. I’m 49.

The last thing women in their forties, fifties and sixties need is a reputation for ‘brain fog’, ‘hormones’, lack of energy and god knows what else! I thought that when I left childbearing age behind I’d be able to dispense with prejudice in my career (employers being loath to choose a thirty something woman over a man because she might, you know, have children and be less dedicated) but now bloody Davina McCall, Meg Mathews and the other exposure seekers are desperate to present menopause as an affliction from which all women in the last 20 years of their working lives must inevitably suffer from. An affliction that makes them over-emotional, forgetful and liable to take lots of time off, to boot. Just what an employer wants. All because the menopause sob sisters want something to talk about on the telly and have a little cry about to show how relevant they are etc etc.

Well, I don’t want Davina McCall and Meg Mathews representing me, thank you. Maybe I will have dreadful symptoms, maybe I won’t, but I don’t want to be co-opted into this ‘all menopausal women are in a dreadful state and need special gentle treatment’ narrative.

There are plenty of women in this age group working very successfully in senior roles and demonstrating that this particular change in your life doesn’t have to be a disaster.

Despite the peri-menopause I wrote and published a book.

I'm 51, and still having periods but thankfully they're light thanks to the Mirena coil I've got in. I get tired easily, and the odd joint pain but think that's ageing tbh. I walk about 5 miles a day with my dogs, eat really healthily (vegetarian and diabetic) and take calcium/magnesium every day.

No stress here

I have had cardiac problems with extreme ectopic beats, terrible Vulval atrophy, regular UTIs, very very low mood and sadness, but no sweats.
Now use oestrogel, Mirino coil and vagifem and all the issues above are much improved now!!

@Iamthewombat

The last thing women in their forties, fifties and sixties need is a reputation for ‘brain fog’, ‘hormones’, lack of energy and god knows what else! I thought that when I left childbearing age behind I’d be able to dispense with prejudice in my career (employers being loath to choose a thirty something woman over a man because she might, you know, have children and be less dedicated) but now bloody Davina McCall, Meg Mathews and the other exposure seekers are desperate to present menopause as an affliction from which all women in the last 20 years of their working lives must inevitably suffer from.

Exactly this. It's a double-edged sword: I'm sure its helpful for some people that they are able to talk about it without feeling ashamed. But the output is often that its yet another reason to write women off as incompetent or incapable or pigeonhole them as being at the mercy of their hormones.

It's also a real bore having to talk about it all the time whenever you go out for drinks with other women. I'd just started to enjoy not endlessly having to discuss children at all female meet-ups. Now it has to be the sodding menopause: another female only rabbit hole.

I am a similar age op and I have started to feel like I am walking into the end of days, as I approach it.
Seems like every time someone on here says they have xxx symptom, someone shoe horns in ' it might be peri menopause' to the poster. ARRGH Peri menopause, if I hear that word one more time on here.
I think its good that its been brought out into the open and certain celebrities are trying to take the stigma away from it, but its too much. I don't want to constantly hear about your symptoms anymore than I want to hear the minute details any other health condition.

I always feel I should apologise for sailing through menopause. My periods became more and more spaced out from late forties until they stopped at about 52. I had hot flushes but none of the sweats where you have to change clothing.

I didn't change my lifestyle, the only difference is no periods, which is fab.

I agree that some symptoms can be misattributed. I was convinced I was peri (mirena coil so no periods so just guesswork) as I was constantly low level angry and couldn't concentrate. Kids went on a residential camp for a week. Miraculous recovery Amazingly, not having someone ask you something every two minutes that they could easily google and a week of blissful silence after 18 months of home school hell (not UK) does wonders for your concentration.

All I would say to those sailing through it (including me) is to have your bone density checked and start lifting those weights.

For the most part I’m fine (sleep is an issue). I don’t feel the need to medicate. But I had my bone density checked and I’m glad I did. It’s one very important ‘symptom’ that can go unnoticed, and you need to stay on top of it.

I went through menopause without hardly any symptoms. A few hot flushes and that was it. No HRT, just sensible diet, daily exercise, swimming, and a glass or two of Vino most days. White or rose in summer, red in winter. And 7 hours sleep at night & sometimes an afternoon nap.