Sayings on MN that you cannot stand!

[Namechangedforthreadbackafter]

Inspired/copied/due to lack of my own ideas

What phrases/come backs/irritating things do people say on MN?

I know that I’m being unreasonable here but I hate the use of the word ‘pop’.

Just pop some cream on it.
I pop it in the oven.
I pop to the shops.

I don’t know why it makes me so irrationally irritated! I hate it!

Oh, I hate "you do you" too!

Also:
You don't have an x problem, you have a DH problem
... gives me the ick (that saying gives me the ick)
Are you very young? So condescending
crying and shaking - such drama!

And of course "Give your head a wobble" - where did that saying even come from? I'd never heard of it until I came to MN.

I hate it when people draft responses on the OP’s behalf. I always read them and think no one would ever fucking write that

“Dear MIL,

After your visit today, I have taken a moment to reflect on the conversation we had in the kitchen. Unfortunately at this juncture, it won’t be possible for us to confirm where we will dine on Christmas Day as our plans are still dependent on a number of other factors. I hope you can understand our position.”

I find it very uncomfortable when a poster has reverse searched the OP (or anyone, for that matter) and then starts with the snide "didn't you..?“ accusations questions. Let it go, you're not Judge Rinder and no-one is impressed.

I hate it when people draft responses on the OP’s behalf. I always read them and think no one would ever fucking write that

Did you see the thread where the op was stood up.

She wondered whether to message the guy, who knew she was at the cafe, waiting for him.

Some of the responses were awful.

"Thanks for standing me up today, thankfully the waiter, who had the most twinkly blue eyes, and a 6 pack, asked me out instead and we hit it off amazingly, we would never have met if it wasn't for you"

Or

"When you failed to show for our date a whole team of fit rugby players came in and I shagged 4 of them. Your loss"

I got embarrassed just reading them.

Get in the sea is irritating

"Am i the only one"?
And then proceed, s to post something like, Am i the only one who hates wearing masks when out and about
Yes Op you are the only one, the rest of us love them so much we wear them around the house 🙄

“MN at its worst”

Always used when a couple of posters have a spat. Never when Mn is at its worst

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult

I hate it when people draft responses on the OP’s behalf. I always read them and think no one would ever fucking write that

Did you see the thread where the op was stood up.

She wondered whether to message the guy, who knew she was at the cafe, waiting for him.

Some of the responses were awful.

"Thanks for standing me up today, thankfully the waiter, who had the most twinkly blue eyes, and a 6 pack, asked me out instead and we hit it off amazingly, we would never have met if it wasn't for you"

Or

"When you failed to show for our date a whole team of fit rugby players came in and I shagged 4 of them. Your loss"

I got embarrassed just reading them.

I didnt see that one but i have seen similar, i always think please dont reply, it will make the Op look about 15.

Nearly everything on this thread annoys me.
I'm beginning to think I just come on MN to wind myself up.
Anyone remember the kids programme from many decades ago called "why don't you....?" Remember the tune?
Why dont you go and turn off the TV and go and do something less boring instead! ( I'm sure it was that)
Maybe I need a Mn break!!!

@Load3

I really hate the D abbreviations.

"DH is a massive twat" so drop the "dear" then.

Start reading a thread only to realise after half a dozen responses they are talking about the "dear dog" not the "dear daughter".

DF - dear father, dear friend, dear fiance...

Yes and a lot of the time they are not particularly dear!

Also thread titles that ask idiotic questions like “has anyone ever had a positive test after a negative?” or “has anyone ever been to Blackpool for the day?”

Nah, no one has. You’re the first.

[Insert word] brigade. I immediately bin the poster in the twit category.

“Boils my piss”

Just a recipe for a nasty water infection

Not exclusive to MN but I fucking hate “water infection”, so twee. Just say UTI. Worst is when it’s deployed in pregnancy threads, where actual waters might be infected.

Anyway, I also hate tis, twere and twas on here. Piss off, Dickens, lest I slap you twixt something.

ANYTHING to do with food, "veggies" or spelt "veges", any way of describing food, "we've lost sight of what a healthy weight is" (which was what I used to think to justify to myself that I could ignore people's concerns about my disordered eating), picnics where they go on about crusty bread... I could go on for days.

I hate ‘fast forward to now’. Your life isn’t a film.

‘Did you mean to be so rude?’ The person in question almost certainly did.

‘Massive salad’.

‘Why did you bother having children?’ directed at working mothers who put their kids in prisons for children (otherwise known as nurseries).

Pearl clutching seems to be particularly overused on here, I've never heard anyone actually say it in real life.

Two things that really irritate me and I saw on here first (I think) which are now everywhere are 'eleventy' and 'bastarding'. No idea why why they annoy me, they just do.

When someone who has problems getting children to different schools on time is told 'learn to drive' or 'move house' as if either of those can be done in a couple of weeks.

Oh and if someone has a problem with neighbour noise "perhaps you should move to a detached property somewhere in the middle of nowhere"

Also, "let children be children" - usually when they are doing something involving other people's property

It's probably already been said but

'Man here'

Or

[Insert job title] here

So irritating.

When someone asks for advice about losing weight, somebody always replies 'Eat less, move more. It really is that simple.'

"can you not just"
Designed to make the other person disagree or defend their position, rather than make a helpful suggestion. I hate it. It makes me disagree with things I actually agree with 😂

And I also detest the grinning emoji on MN.