Holidays are ending and I'm feeling like a failure.

[Kales29]

Hello all. Not really an aibu but posting here for traffic...

I have two kids. Nearly 11 and 6. My eldest has sen. They go back to school next week.

It's suddenly dawned on me how little we've achieved in the holidays whereas my newsfeed is full of people who have had numerous days out and holidays etc.

I've been at home with them whilst dh has worked long hours. I don't have much confidence taking them out on my own as mr son can be unpredictable.

We live in Cornwall, it's so busy so we've not done that much unless it's been first thing to avoid crowds or walks around our village! We've been to a small theme park right at the beginning.

Hasn't helped that I had minor surgery at the beginning of the holidays. I had to isolate prior to going in then recovery wasn't as swift as anticipated so we were stuck in.

We've been to the park a few times, walks, beach just one time (hoping for sunny September weekends when it's quieter), one theme park trip (local). Visited family a couple times, they never come here. Haven't managed to meet up with any friends but Dd has met with her friend just once in the holidays. That's about it. I did take the kids shopping with pocket money once or twice for a treat. We've also had a McDonald's treat a couple times. But they've been off for nearly 7 weeks and I feel like we've achieved nothing. We haven't been swimming or anything. No cinema trips! Just the same stuff we always do!

Other parents on my fb have been out every single day! I'm just exhausted to do that. DS doesn't sleep much as I sometimes haven't got the energy to get everyone ready.

Thankfully we do have a big garden and they've had their paddling pool out once or twice when the sun came out.

But there's been several days just stuck home doing absolutely nothing apart from play or watch tv.

Friends have been away for weekends.

I'm just feeling like such a failure that we haven't made many memories.

Does anyone else feel this way?!

I am worried that they will be discussing what they've done and we've done naff all. We haven't even manage to bake or do any crafts or anything!

Anyone else feeling like this?

Hoping for a sunny September and weekends that will be quieter than it has been!

Don't ask people on social media if your kids had a good summer holiday - ask your kids! If your oldest has SEN perhaps he'd rather be at home doing his own thing, I know mine would. And your youngest is only 6.
If they would like to go away somewhere then why not book a weekend somewhere not too far away from you for September? Or to go see their grandparents if that's an option. What about planning something for next summer? Why is your DH working such long hours?

This is the first holiday I haven’t been working every day and I’ve done LOADS. We’ve been constantly away, lots of days out, lots of memories, amazing.

BUT on the flip side I regret it a bit. They haven’t had a rest, they are knackered, I am knackered, we went far too far the other way. Look at my feed and you’d have that jealous reaction but you don’t see that I’m struggling in work today, feel in need of a break from a break.

So yes, the kids need some fun but they also need downtime so stop with the guilt, it doesn’t sound like you’ve done nothing at all with them!

Next year I’m aiming for a happy medium between the two, we need to stop beating ourselves up as mums.

It's fine. What you see on FB is just a snapshot of "best bits" with a positive editorial slant! My FB probably looks like that but in reality we spent a lot of time at home and kids spent far too much time on screens. On some of the days we did make it out it was just to go to our local park for half an hour (where I'd boredly scroll on my phone). There's no photos of that!

I did make more effort some days, I think we went swimming once, wildlife park once, cinema not at all. Paddling pool out for a few days. Played monopoly twice I think. Meant to have friends round for bbq but couldn't be arsed. We went to Scotland for a week's holiday and all we heard from youngest was that she hated walking and when were we going back to the holiday house so she could go on you tube and Netflix. Aaarrghh!

I also think it isn't a good thing to do entertaining stuff every day. Kids need to amuse themselves some of the time, and if you do treat stuff all the time, it isn't special any more.

Fuck what other people have done op. We've done a fair bit this holiday but usually we don't. Not 1 thing is posted on my fb so people probably think we've done nothing I don't care. Aslong as the kids are happy who cares. My son has autism and his favourite way to spend a day is staying in, in his room, with his things.

My 7 year old has done nothing this summer. Spent her birthday in isolation because we all had covid, missed a holiday with her grandad because of it too. I’m heavily pregnant and very sick so we’ve been nowhere. Husband works 12-14 hour days. She’s ok though.

@Kales29

Hello all. Not really an aibu but posting here for traffic...

I have two kids. Nearly 11 and 6. My eldest has sen. They go back to school next week.

It's suddenly dawned on me how little we've achieved in the holidays whereas my newsfeed is full of people who have had numerous days out and holidays etc.

I've been at home with them whilst dh has worked long hours. I don't have much confidence taking them out on my own as mr son can be unpredictable.

We live in Cornwall, it's so busy so we've not done that much unless it's been first thing to avoid crowds or walks around our village! We've been to a small theme park right at the beginning.

Hasn't helped that I had minor surgery at the beginning of the holidays. I had to isolate prior to going in then recovery wasn't as swift as anticipated so we were stuck in.

We've been to the park a few times, walks, beach just one time (hoping for sunny September weekends when it's quieter), one theme park trip (local). Visited family a couple times, they never come here. Haven't managed to meet up with any friends but Dd has met with her friend just once in the holidays. That's about it. I did take the kids shopping with pocket money once or twice for a treat. We've also had a McDonald's treat a couple times. But they've been off for nearly 7 weeks and I feel like we've achieved nothing. We haven't been swimming or anything. No cinema trips! Just the same stuff we always do!

Other parents on my fb have been out every single day! I'm just exhausted to do that. DS doesn't sleep much as I sometimes haven't got the energy to get everyone ready.

Thankfully we do have a big garden and they've had their paddling pool out once or twice when the sun came out.

But there's been several days just stuck home doing absolutely nothing apart from play or watch tv.

Friends have been away for weekends.

I'm just feeling like such a failure that we haven't made many memories.

Does anyone else feel this way?!

I am worried that they will be discussing what they've done and we've done naff all. We haven't even manage to bake or do any crafts or anything!

Anyone else feeling like this?

Hoping for a sunny September and weekends that will be quieter than it has been!

God OP you're so hard on yourself...seven weeks with a big garden, chilling, the occasional paddling pool, walking around a Cornish village, trip to the seaside, no doubt that lovely clotted cream ice cream stuff here and there, a theme park, all that fresh sea air where you live...sounds completely bloody marvelous.

Get off Facebook, it's the thief of all joy, clearly!!

If you had instagrammed: Trip to the beach! Adventure playground! Paddling pool in the garden! DD seeing her bestie! Lovely catch up with relatives! Cheeky MacDonalds! etc etc everyone else would think you were the perfect mum who had spent the entire holidays dreaming up perfect days. Don't trust SM. It's all edited highlights.

And children need time doing nothing in the summer. It is really good for their brain development to have to entertain themselves and bypass boredom and invent games. Being entertained 24/7 makes them passive.

I'm feeling the exact same way! Feel like I haven't done much with the kids at all. I've recently made a career change which meant I've been busy with work amongst other things. The kids didn't have seemed to notice we haven't done much, so must just be mum "quilt" on my side. I'm planning on doing more next half term and plan on making a "things to do during half terms" poster, not just for the next half term but all the other half terms, just to make it a bit easier to actually achieve all/most things on the list. Maybe that's an idea?