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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this is actually really creepy?

87 replies

Fired · 01/09/2021 11:16

I've just seen this viral post on the reddit front page. It was posted in a "Made Me Smile" section.

To me it seems very creepy! This bouncer, a stranger, took another drunk (vulnerable) stranger to their home, undressed them and put them to bed and then is happy to let them stay and use their home like a hotel? Bonkers!

Almost like the beginning of a serial killer film or something. The person tries to leave the house only to find they are locked in and can't escape.

To think this is actually really creepy?
OP posts:
AmyDudley · 01/09/2021 13:05

Oh the book is called The Friend by Dorothy Koomson in case anyone is remotely interested (that bit I described is a only a small part of it)

Fuckityfucksake · 01/09/2021 13:05

@AmyDudley

That's weird - I'm just reading a novel where that happens - the girl is very grateful that the guy helped her/ kept her safe/ washed her clothes/ cleaned up her vomit etc. but it turns out he had drugged her drink and while she was unconscious he and his friends had taken pornographic photos of her and sexually assaulted her.

Anyway I digress - yes creepy as fuck. Strange men shouldn't ever be taking of a woman's clothes or taking her back to their place its insane.

What's the book called? I thought a film or series but it could well be a book I read...My bloody memory is shocking!
JinglingHellsBells · 01/09/2021 13:10

@DrSbaitso

I really, really don't think this is real. Far too many potential issues, far too many reasons why it couldn't work in practice.

I think it's something someone thought up as a well-intentioned concept and image. Nothing more.

Agreed
JinglingHellsBells · 01/09/2021 13:11

@Fired

It's made up!

You found it on reddit FGS!

what on earth makes you think it's something that exists in real life?

Crinkle77 · 01/09/2021 13:14

@MarieIVanArkleStinks

This isn't real, surely.
Yes this.
Fuckityfucksake · 01/09/2021 13:17

@AmyDudley

Oh the book is called The Friend by Dorothy Koomson in case anyone is remotely interested (that bit I described is a only a small part of it)
Thank you I cross posted with you. I've just had a quick look and it's possible I've read it so that might be where I've remembered this scenario from. It's definitely not real.
furbabymama87 · 01/09/2021 13:17

If it's real which I presume it's not ,then yes it's creepy. The bouncers may come into contact with drunk people but it's not for them to take people home like that. I'd be phoning the police if I woke up to that.

Original poster
Fired · 01/09/2021 13:19

[quote JinglingHellsBells]@Fired

It's made up!

You found it on reddit FGS!

what on earth makes you think it's something that exists in real life?[/quote]
Because creepy and dangerous people exist in real life? Reddit isn't just incel forums? Mostly I go there for cat pictures and gardening chat.

But for the third time, I am surprised this gained so many likes/points and that so many people think it's a kind/good thing to do! Felt like I was being the bonkers one by saying this isn't kind or wholesome so wanted to discuss it here, in a women dominated space.

OP posts:
ReggaetonLente · 01/09/2021 13:20

Christ, I'd think I'd been unwittingly cast in a remake of Misery

HarebrightCedarmoon · 01/09/2021 13:20

When I worked in a nightclub 25 years ago the doorstaff were as dodgy as fuck. I wouldn't have trusted any of them to feed the cat let alone take someone home and look after them. When we were going out around that time doorstaff were usually rude and unhelpful, without it being warranted, and on more than one occasion put me or my friends in danger for no reason whatsoever. Such as, you'd come outside for a breather and they'd randomly decide not to let you in again, not even to tell your friends what had happened. They were fucking lowlifes, being run by organised criminal gangs.

I hope it is different today, but my experiences have led me to say that I wouldn't trust a bouncer as far as I could throw one.

The only nice guys were at the student union, they really would scrape someone off the floor and look after them, and generally helped to make it a safe space to be in.

Original poster
Fired · 01/09/2021 13:24

Also, yes, I agree that it's fake! But how worrying that people think it's lovely.

OP posts:
PluggingAway · 01/09/2021 13:25

I would imagine this isn't real, surely?

HarebrightCedarmoon · 01/09/2021 13:26

Anyway, yes of course the note is fucking creepy. If it was hand-written and spur of the moment it would be totally different, but being printed makes it look pre-mediated and planned. And there are myriad other things you could do to help someone in that state which do not involve taking them to your home.

TheFairPrincess · 01/09/2021 13:26

This just sounds like the weird POV tiktok trend in a different format. People love to invent, and seemingly now broadcast, situations where they feel they are coming across as super caring and sensitive to women’s needs. It’s really weird and just comes across as creepy as fuck

RosiePosieDozy · 01/09/2021 13:32

So creepy. Hoping it's not real.

The printed out note suggests that this is a regular occurrence. He brings home a drunk woman regularly. Eugh.

Chocolatier9 · 01/09/2021 13:37

My first reaction was how kind. I’m obviously naive and as thick as two short ones and it’s now clear to me why I ended up in one or two idiotic situations when I was younger.

annacondom · 01/09/2021 13:38

The details like removing her tight-fitting jewellery and washing her jeans are very odd. Why doesn't it say "your necklace" or whatever (presuming it was necessary to remove it). Suggests it's generic and a regular occurrence, and not specific to this event. And washing jeans? Without asking? It doesn't ring true.

whoopsnomore · 01/09/2021 13:39

@HarrietsChariot

Better than leaving them in a state where they were vulnerable and incapable of looking after themselves surely? OK some might say the bouncer should have called the police, but the police have enough to do, and being drunk and incapable is a crime so the bouncer might have saved the person from getting into trouble.

The only person in the wrong is the one who got so drunk they couldn't look after themselves. We shouldn't blame the person who did a nice thing to help them out.

I know of a number of young women having their drinks spiked in bars/clubs. They "couldn't look after themselves".
Original poster
Fired · 01/09/2021 13:39

@Chocolatier9

My first reaction was how kind. I’m obviously naive and as thick as two short ones and it’s now clear to me why I ended up in one or two idiotic situations when I was younger.
Don't be hard on yourself. Ten years ago I might have thought the same thing. I have worked in bars/pubs/restaurants etc. my whole life and I often help drunk people get home or find their friends but this would just be about 10 steps too far!
OP posts:
pinkflask · 01/09/2021 13:41

This makes me think of Dennis from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia 😂

Thefirsttime · 01/09/2021 13:41

It’s bollocks.

They’ve given themselves away- part of it is written in American English-city center, jewelry.
But they also mention paracetamol. Americans don’t say paracetamol they call it Acetaminophen. On that basis I say bollocks to it and that it is all made up.

SenselessUbiquity · 01/09/2021 13:47

"Over-sized hoodies in the drawer" is creepy because the person who carefully type-set and printed this is imagining a pretty, confused, elf-like hungover female drifting downstairs with bare legs in his "over-sized hoodie", which is a recognisable TV / Movie trope which leaves to the imagination whether she is wearing anything under it or not.

banoffeee · 01/09/2021 13:53

I always assume these sorts of things are just made up (along with screen shots of text message conversations and that sort of thing) maybe occasionally something authentic goes viral but 99% of the time it’s fake and created for the purpose of trying to make a viral image

TooManyDinosaurs1 · 01/09/2021 14:20

When I was travelling in my early 20s I was staying in Sydney in a backpackers hostel (was a really nice modern one so more like a hotel really, not what you might imagine when you think backpackers hostel - run down, grubby etc). Anyway me and the lad I was dating at the time had gone to the bar that was attached to the hostel for a night out, we decided to call it a night at some stupid time and found a girl very drunk wandering the street outside alone crying she'd lost her friends and her phone was flat. She was in such a state and very scantily clad. We were really worried so asked if we could help, maybe find her way home or something? She said where she was staying so we found out it was close by so said we'd walk her home. When we got there she said it wasn't where she was staying 🙈. We couldn't just walk away and leave her she was so vulnerable and had no idea where she was or where she was staying and no means to find out. So I suggested she stayed in our hostel (we were in a dorm room not a private room) I let her have my bed. It was about 3am and we didn't have the same phones so had no other way to help. I got up the next day and she'd already left, I hope to god she didn't forget it was us who offered her the bed and she didn't freak out thinking some weirdo had lured her there, maybe I should have left her a note like this lol?

Fangdango · 01/09/2021 14:21

@Thefirsttime

It’s bollocks.

They’ve given themselves away- part of it is written in American English-city center, jewelry.
But they also mention paracetamol. Americans don’t say paracetamol they call it Acetaminophen. On that basis I say bollocks to it and that it is all made up.

Yes - clever point.

Also - all that detail but "possibly" food in the fridge? If it's not a regular occurrence, surely he'd know ...

All printed so nice and clearly for Instagram, with details so the wider public can get the picture. I am obviously ungrateful but the patronising tone of that note would enrage me - esp assuming hangover. Make it a PowerPoint presentation about What A Good Guy I Was why don't you?

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