To wonder what the weirdest thing a colleague has ever said to you?

[RainbowBriteUk]

My ex-CEO who hated me said she thought I had beautifully stunning eyes but not in a lesbian way. Disrespectful shit in all ways she was.

Same ex-CEO said lots of other batty shit!

One boss kept saying, repeatedly that I really resembled another employee that I hadn't yet met. She'd say, you're just like her, she's pretty like you (bit weird), you're so similar etc

When I met her we were pretty much polar opposites, opposite hair colours, features, nationalities, personalities, physicality etc

Could never work that one out .

Too many to mention. But the best possibly

“Why don’t you just marry one of your customers” I was already married

“Why don’t you have children. Do you have a problem with your ovaries”

the mind boggles sometimes

*Hellocatshome

A colleague said to me "I'm assuming the baby wasn't planned" and "I always thought you were a lesbian because you have tattoos and purple hair" all in one conversation she also told my colleague she wasn't a "proper ni**er" (can't bring myself to write it) because she had relaxed hair and a white boyfriend.

Er…how did she not get sacked (or did she)? shock*

She quit when she was invited to a disciplinary meeting.

"I'm glad I didn't have children because they could have been like you."

It sounds bad but it actually made me laugh.

@Buggerthebotox

"What you need is a damn good rogering". .

Said to me by a colleague. In front of the whole office.

I either used to work with you or this exact thing happened in another workplace. Probably the latter, depressingly.

I was going on holiday to Disney with a friend when I was in my first job. Male boss told me not to hug random men in Mickey Mouse costumes

"You're quite plain, aren't you?" I was 16. Funnily enough, my.mum told me that her auntie said the same thing to her when she was 14, and Mum, in all innocence said, "It's funny, Aunt Ada, 'cos people say I'm like you!"

Not something said but I once had a holy roller male co worker put a chocolate lollipop shaped like a penis on my and everyone else’s desk. His wife made them. I was shocked but my other co-workers just brushed it off and said that the husband and wife “were just that way”. I was young & stupid, I wish I knew then what I know now.

Was pregnant and suffering horrendously. Sickness, bleeding, pain, baby might have growth problems - manager 'well there is something you could do to make it ... stop'
I left shortly after that.

When they were finally clawing their way into the 1990s and introducing IT at the local authority I worked at, a colleague flatly refused to even turn his PC on.

On being asked why not, he announced, proudly, "Because I'm not a fucking typist and I'm not a fucking woman".

My old manager told me 'he had a dream about me...' que the pause then said 'it was wet'.
I told him he was old enough to be my dad and walked off, still makes me skin crawl.

Same manager at the christmas party asked all the male colleagues to make their perfect woman out of features of us female 🤢

He understood exactly how I felt about my late Mc because he had a cat once that died.
He phoned me to specifically tell me this, despite the fact that as far as I was aware only my boss and HR knew I was pg

Working in a male dominated industry, male colleague said to me “you are looking a bit bloated, is it you time of the month”

When I was younger a colleague said to me that I could have a career as a Page 3 girl.

I’d actually quite fancied him right up until that moment.

I got told I’d make a good high class call girl.

Jesus, these all make my glad I’m a SAHM!!! Some people are just plain nasty!

Mine are more lighthearted WTF moments.

One told me she dreamt I took my driving test and passed so I must now go and get driving lessons and to book a test. She nagged me all day about it.

The other (we weren't close and barely talked)asked me if she could live with me for a couple of months until she moved to Scotland. I asked if she looked into renting and she said she did but doesn't want to as you can't trust just anyone. It didn't occur to her I might not trust what was barely an acquaintance living in my house with my kid.

A colleague bought me an anti-radiation cover for my phone () as he was worried about my ovaries. Apparently it would be a tragedy if I didn't reproduce.

A very handsome colleague in the early nineties...

"You smell nice today. Not enough to make me want to shag you."

"You've got such a great personality, it's a shame you're not...thinner."

Total knob of a colleague in the early 00s...

"You'd be stunning if you lost a stone."

Boss - ‘so what do you do when you’re off. Sit around eating chocolate?’
Um no. ( I wish)

Colleague- ‘but I can’t eat a Yorkie bar- it says not for girls on the wrapper’
Same colleague -‘I can’t eat Turkish delight. My mum doesn’t like it!’

One asked me if she could ask me a question. Intrigued I said yes and she asked if my 4 children all have the same father. Yes they do. She thought they would have different fathers as there is 'so many' of them .

A colleague once said to me "oh, have you seen my bracelet?! What do you think?"
It was like the style in the picture except each bead was clear plastic with a drop of red plastic in the middle which surrounded a tiny plastic foetus.
Then she said "it's to represent all the babies murdered by abortion".
I was only about 19 and she was an older lady who had worked their for many years. I just stood with my mouth hanging open and all I could think to say was "that's very unusual looking".
It was only upon reflection that I realised how wildly inappropriate it was to wear to work!

A male colleague asked why I did not dress more feminine when in work. We had a uniform, and I was the only female on the team so my uniform was identical to theirs.

A fellow manager on an adults social work team opined that all older people who were being abused by their families must have done something to deserve it. When I asked somewhat incredulously "what, all? Surely that can't be the case" she replied very tartly "I don't want to discuss it".

When I told my boss I was pregnant (honeymoon baby) she asked if I was Catholic. Same pregnancy a male colleague refused to let me have a biscuit when offering them round “because you don’t want to get too fat”. Another colleague, when I was grumbling about people not giving up their seats on the train suggested that if being pregnant was so difficult, maybe I should just get signed off work. Oh and I got made redundant while on maternity leave…

A part time technician in an entirely different unconnected department, who i probably saw once a year if that, heard I had a promotion and demanded I outline to her exactly how I was qualified for the job. I actually thought she was joking at first as I cannot tell you how totally unconnected we are and how much it would be none of her business but also not affect her life in any way at all.