This summer we took on a kitten from a friends unexpected litter. Before we had the kitten we knew we had a UK holiday booked and so I asked my mother if she would look after the kitten at my mother’s house to allow us to go away. This was about 7 weeks ago and before we said yes to having the kitten. It was all agreed and we had our kitten three weeks ago.
We now leave on Friday and my mother is demanding that she lives in our house for the week and because I’ve said no, my mother is being so nasty with me. For background, my mother is a difficult character, she’s moody, angry and very possessive of me and my children. She lives 20 minutes away and is in my house all the time and she get’s annoyed if I don’t see her a couple of times a week. I have tried to put in boundaries many times and they are often walked all over. On the flip side, my mother can also be very lonely because she’s a widow, and she can be lovely with my children. She get’s really annoyed if we visit my parents in law or if they look after my children and she often thinks of herself as the second parent-over my husband.
My mother has already decided that she’s going to sleep in my 4 year olds bed and that she will live in my house and clean it for me whilst I’m away. My house is already clean, even though she often makes me feel like it’s the equivalent of a crack den (I had a cleaner once and my mother followed her around telling her all the spots she missed and hiding my Hoover on a weekly basis so that she wouldn’t use mine, eventually and understandably she quit).
I don’t want my mother staying, I feel uncomfortable with it but it’s making her really angry that I don’t want her to live in my house and it’s causing so many arguments.
I have said that I would ask a friend to look after the kitten for us but she’s decided that was an absolutely stupid idea. In reality, I know that if I were to ask a friend then she would hit the roof.
AIBU to not want my mother to stay at my house?