To think my DS is completely stuffed

[logincard]

my DS has 5 grade 7s and 4 6's at GCSE.

he missed out on acceptance to his grammar school for A level ( by one point) and we now have no place for him to study A levels.

He had a conditional offer from another school. He has the grades, but I found out yesterday that he never actually accepted this offer ….

I have contacted every state and private school in the borough and close by and no one has a space, we have appealed a grade at his grammar school. (But I hold out little hope for that)

What can we do? He has. No space for A levels . And no one has to help us, he’s just on his own ….

There are literally loads of sixth form colleges that you can get to from SW London. Lambeth college, Esher college, Kingston college, Richmond college to name just a few. All of them do A level courses. This is a complete non issue

I agree. Also Woking sixth form college. Could potentially even get to Farnborough sixth form on the train. Both excellent with wide range of subject options.

Does he actually want to go OP? Or do you want him to go?

He didn’t accept it for a reason. Lots of places offer apprenticeship schemes for sixteen year olds - trades, councils, Bae systems, Journalism, accountancy etc. Further education isn’t for everything and he might thrive in a workplace.

@GreenLakes Exactly. DS isn't a hardworking student.

Sixth form college will be the answer. I think context is important here. For people that aren't aware, in old school money, a 7 is an A and a 6 is a B, with a bit of stretch at the boundaries (i.e a low 6 could be a high C). So we are talking about 16 year olds who have just been through an extremely challenging couple of years, messed around with GCSEs are happening, then they're not, then they are again but no mocks etc etc. So 16 year old boys being told low As and high Bs are not good enough. And at grammar schools and private sixth forms, they aren't really, which I think is a bit shit, especially post Covid.

My son was potentially in a similar position. He is at a private school in South London. There you have to get 6 x7s to get into sixth form and 7's in the subjects you will do for A Level. Local state schools require 5s. The sixth form college I applied to for him as a backup requires 6s in the subjects you will take for A level. You get what you pay/tutor for I guess!

My point is, don't feel too despondent, there will be people like my son who have just scraped into sixth form and want to go there to stay with their mates - so will shortly be giving up their sixth form college place. And the sixth form colleges have less ridiculous expectations as well - round here the top ones want 6s for the A level choices but some will accepts 5s.

Having said that, we knew this going in right? (Although my sons school changed the requirement for sixth form from 6s to 7s after he started there). There's a reason grammar schools are top of league tables. It's a harsh old system for the academically more average though, no two ways about it. And remember, your and my son might only be average with 6s and 7s in the private/grammar bubble, but compared to the national average and other children their age they have done very well. I hope they both know that, but sadly the system they are in doesn't value them as much as it should, in my opinion. And doesn't make provision for the many, many people who are pretty average/immature at 16 and then improve/smash it for A levels/Uni as they mature (myself included).

Hugs, this is horrible, I know. I was very much expecting to be in this position myself. Phone round the sixth forms. I'd be astounded if they didn't have a place for someone with his background and grades by September.

[quote NerrSnerr]@Marmitemarinaded it'd be easier if the OP was honest about it though. Saying he's stuffed when there are plenty of options is frustrating. [/quote]
Yes agreed
I own the fact that when it comes to my children

I don’t give a hoot about political correctness
If i thought a school was not right for my children because of what I’ve seen of the other pupils and it wasn’t In a good area and so yes… was “common”! I would not want it for my children.

@HunkyPunk

The thing is though that there shouldn’t be lots of wriggle room for existing students- particularly not for sporting reasons.

If a year 11 at a comp applies for the grammar sixth form, works their arse off and gets 9s and 8s, they should absolutely get a place over an existing student who coasts or puts in minimum effort at GCSE.

Can you not appeal to the Grammar school, make something up about family trauma that your FS was dealing with during his A levels etc, one point is very harsh to throw someone out, especially with no other place for him.

My children’s grammar school is supposedly very strict, lots of people are not allowed re-entry, in one of my sons years 2 close friends were not offered a place despite begging, nice well behaved children , I then found out that someone who missed by 4 grades were allowed back. They had a difficult home life and had difficult behaviour, I can only assume that this was somehow made allowance for.

Appeal to the governor’s, say you were having marriage difficulties, your parent was gravely ill and you thought you were going to lose them in the middle of his exams? These are teacher assessed grades, is there any scope that his grade history could cast doubt on the grades awarded? Anything to ‘explain’ his points. Not that they need explaining, 57’s and 46’s it’s bloody ridiculous to lose your place on those good grades!

*Even she was I fail to see the problem When it comes to my children’s education - my political correctness tendencies go out the window"

As long as those tendencies are well informed. Sixth form colleges are excellent and their students go to high ranking universities. Friend of son's went to Farnborough 6th form college and is doing Maths at Warwick. Another friend' son went to expensive public school - and, you guessed it, is doing Maths at Warwick. So second friend could have saved themselves thousands in school fees...

Sixth forms don't tend to be "common". The kids are there because they want to be, and want to do the subjects they've chosen.

we have done that. I have written a grovelling email and so has he, they say they are full but will consider him at the start of term if anyone drops out ...

This strikes me as extremely unusual and inflexible. I would presume they are making it difficult for your son to continue with them.

What about Btech?

This made me laugh!

* He didn’t accept it for a reason. *

16, lazy, distracted, sport, first love

@igelkott2021

Sixth forms don't tend to be "common". The kids are there because they want to be, and want to do the subjects they've chosen.

Not true

Many because literally no other option

Plus families will continue to get benefits if In full time education

@Monestera

we have done that. I have written a grovelling email and so has he, they say they are full but will consider him at the start of term if anyone drops out ...

This strikes me as extremely unusual and inflexible. I would presume they are making it difficult for your son to continue with them.

What about Btech?

This made me laugh!

Rude. For many kids Btech is the only option available to them.

@Monestera

Again, it is not unusual at all for grammars. Grammar sixth forms have entry requirements for both internal and external applicants.

If they are not met, the DC is very unlikely to get a place.

@Marmitemarinaded

* He didn’t accept it for a reason. *

16, lazy, distracted, sport, first love

Or he doesn’t want to go.

Rude. For many kids Btech is the only option available to them.

I think they were laughing because it’s BTEC not Btech. 🤷‍♂️

Rude. For many kids Btech is the only option available to them.

Quite. But if OP won't consider a college I can't see her embracing BTECs, can you?

OP, many Richmond Schools have high levels of achievement at A Level.
The top performer is Waldegrave Girls (takes boys in the Sixth Form). I think in terms of intake they out achieve Tiffins. Lots of Richmond Schools are very academic and they will have an Oxbridge/Medical School programme as well.
He will get a place at one of these school sixth forms so choose the school and pester!

There is some absolutely textbook Mumsnet snobbery on this thread. I expect nothing less from this place really, but it's very interesting to see how desperate people are to keep their kids away from less privileged kids. Really interesting.

Again, it is not unusual at all for grammars. Grammar sixth forms have entry requirements for both internal and external applicants.

Fair enough, my experience is in Yorkshire. Perhaps there is a difference in terms of flexibility and pastoral care.

Sorry you are having this worry OP.

I hope you have had some luck speaking with the education department this morning.

It’s at times like this I am glad we are in Scotland.

I think the poster was laughing at the BTEC comment because the OP is obviously not going to approve of a BTEC, not that there is anything wrong with them.

@Monestera

Why should an external applicant who has worked extremely hard and got 9s and 8s miss out to an existing student who has not put in the effort?

The idea that a school like Tiffin will drop its requirements for two sciences from 8.0 to 6.6 because someone writes a letter with tales of made up family crises is ridiculous. Across 8 subjects, he is 11 grades away from what he needs.

OP I’m not coming down on you but you said words to effect that academics aren’t the be all and end all so would like him to go somewhere where he had some friends.

As parents ( and I say this as a parent who attempted to get my son into many a grammar including Tiffin which is 9 miles from me in Y7 and only just managed now to get him into a private for Y9 on a bursary) when we look at selective schools like that, the academics is at the forefront, otherwise we will just send them to the local state school. I know many people that wouldn’t dream of sending their child to a Uber selective, highly pressurised environment like Tiffin as they want them to not be all about drilled academics, and I totally get that.

I think friendships are important but if you cast your net wider he will make friends, trust me on that one. My eldest DS went to CVMS In Holland Park for secondary and we live in North London but he still had friends, college was a neighbouring borough so not as far as CVMS but not local either and he kept in contact with one or two, now university was still in London but 10 miles away and because with uni you have students from all over the world he has close bonds with friends as near as 2 miles away to one living in Denmark.

Your DS will make friends, if he goes to a college or 6th form 90 mins away that doesn’t mean he can’t form friendships etc, so please don’t let that be the main deciding factor on the establishment you all look at. However if as people are starting to point out/question you don’t want him going to a college because you aren’t keen on them then that’s a different ballgame.