Or is my DH on this?

[merrygoround88]

On a big family holiday (his family). Having a lovely time

4 nights in and after dinner I decide to go to bed earlier than usual (11ish)
Lots of kids still up milling around having fun. My DS is in his room but younger DS still running around. Kids tend to go to bed with adults so late.

He’s in another ‘out house’ so each night I’ve gone over to tuck in, give kids, reassurance etc. By the time I get back DH is in bed and often asleep.

DSons are in an out house with an auntie etc so fun but it’s important I think for one parent to say good night anyway.

My DH comes into bedroom and I ask is he not bringing DS to bed. It’s a shared area DS sleeps in so it does mean waiting till everyone is heading to bed.

DH Huffs and puffs and says I am ordering him just because I’ve gone to sleep.

I’ve done this every night so AIBU to expect him to wait up and tuck in his own child to sleep?

Anyone or have I totally lost it at this late hour

No, it's your holiday too. You've already done 4 nights, it's really not too much to ask him to do his fair share.

Absolutely no idea what set up you’re describing- an auntie in an out house? You want your DH to bring your DS into bed with you? What?

@HaveringWavering I'm pleased I'm not the only confused one! I can't make head nor tail of the OP.

AuntieInAnOutHouse would make a great username though

@HaveringWavering

Absolutely no idea what set up you’re describing- an auntie in an out house? You want your DH to bring your DS into bed with you? What?

"On holiday. I've put the kids to bed every night so far. AIBU to expect DH to take his turn?"

Lots of kids milling about having fun at 11pm. And they're not old enough to put themselves to bed. If my spouse was happy with that situation, they'd be doing every night.

Lazy lazy lazy. Him obviously, not you

How old is your son? If 8 or older he probably finds the whole tuck in routine embarrassing. If younger and dependent in it to sleep his father should take his turn.

YANBU..

You DH sounds like a lazy selfish twat...

I understood you OP

I think the age of the child is important to this story. They are not out there on their own, they are with an Aunt. If he's little like 4 then yes a good night might be nice. But if he's 10 thats crazy.

If your son is old enough to still be up messing around St 11 then he's probably too old to be tucked into bed by mummy and daddy.

Could you not say goodnight when YOU go to bed? If DS is old enough to still be running around at 11pm, and is being looked after by an Aunt, I really don't understand why any other adult needs to be present to tuck him into bed?

It all sounds a bit nonsensical, and quite chaotic.

@1forAll74

It all sounds a bit nonsensical, and quite chaotic.

nonsensical ?!

how rude 😳

This thread makes zero sense. I also can’t understand the set up

Why is everyone spending so much time in various toilets together?

@DewDew83

Why is everyone spending so much time in various toilets together?

You really though that when the OP used the phrase ‘outhouse’ she meant lavatory? You sincerely believed that she meant children and an aunty were sleeping together in a lavatory?

Really?

Or were you simply being deliberately obtuse and staggeringly rude?

Or were you simply being deliberately obtuse and staggeringly rude?
Deliberately obtuse but I fail to see how it's 'staggeringly rude'. Not really sure what your problem is.

Thanks for the replies. By ‘out house’ I meant barn. We are in the main house and Ds is in a shared sleeping area in the barn.

He is 9 so certainly old enough enough but he’s a child who likes to be tucked in and I’m ok with that. All the other children have a parent putting them to bed so I didn’t want mine being left putting themselves to bed, in a living room on their own. Maybe I am being overly precious but I was just a bit annoyed that my DH made such a big deal of staying up with his family to put his own child to bed.

To posters who mentioned chaos, yes it’s utter chaos but a very happy family holiday

Or were you simply being deliberately obtuse and staggeringly rude?

Calm down @MissTrip82

Do you mean ‘taking’ him to bed, as in taking him to the outhouse/barn and tucking him in which is what you’ve done each night?

Or bringing him to you so you can say goodnight before he takes him to bed?

The former YANBU

The latter YABU

I mean taking him to bed and saying goodnight. I was in bed myself at this point and had asked DH to do this but he was pissed off that he would have to wait until the larger group went to bed.

Probably only 20/30 mins extra

Your 9 year old should have been put to bed hours earlier, not way past 11pm.

In a family situation surely he could give ds a hug goodnight and ask the other family members if they would mind checking ds is ok before they go to bed.
As long as you didn't leave it to other people every night that should be fine.
I think it is the fact that you can't switch off as you know dh will just go to bed when he feels like it without making sure ds is ok whereas you wouldn't do that, that is the issue here.

I think YABU for this particular incident.

Generally YANBU to want him to share bedtime with the kids.