To be pissed at DH for staying out this late!

[Dandy008]

5pm tonight DH gets a call from his friend inviting him to the pub.

DH arranged to meet his friend at 7pm for a “few drinks”.

Fast forward to nearly 4am and DH still isn’t home.

It’s the 3rd time in 4 weeks that he has been out drinking and it’s never just been “a few drinks”

A few weeks ago he was out overnight in Newcastle and in two weeks he will be out on an overnight stag weekend.

I don’t meant to sound like a nag, or his mother…

But we have an 18 month old child, and I don’t feel like DH is acting as if we do.

Since DC was born I’ve had one night out.
I met some friends for lunch at 12pm and I was back home by 6pm.

I’m assuming DH has gone into town as the pub he was going to shuts at 1am.

I feel like I’m really starting to resent him with how he’s behaving.

Sadly he's showing by his actions that his words were meaningless.

It would be a dealbreaker for me.

Going out and occasionally drinking too much is understandable. Regularly staying out ridiculously late, coming back in that state not ok.

@Dandy008

5pm tonight DH gets a call from his friend inviting him to the pub.

DH arranged to meet his friend at 7pm for a “few drinks”.

Fast forward to nearly 4am and DH still isn’t home.

It’s the 3rd time in 4 weeks that he has been out drinking and it’s never just been “a few drinks”

A few weeks ago he was out overnight in Newcastle and in two weeks he will be out on an overnight stag weekend.

I don’t meant to sound like a nag, or his mother…

But we have an 18 month old child, and I don’t feel like DH is acting as if we do.

Since DC was born I’ve had one night out.
I met some friends for lunch at 12pm and I was back home by 6pm.

I’m assuming DH has gone into town as the pub he was going to shuts at 1am.

I feel like I’m really starting to resent him with how he’s behaving.

Gonna be the devil's advocate abit here so here goes you have to remember that we have all been in lockdown prepares hes just letting his hair down we've had a full year of not been able to go out at all so now to be able to see friends again and be a busy environment is a blessing.

However, i dont agree with you aleays been left at home with a 18 month old maybe agree on some nights out for yourself and he stays home or nights out together and get a babysitter.

I wouldn't let him going out all the time become a regular thing prehaps be a little more understanding and make an arrangement on how often it is acceptable to be going out per month especially with a young child at home.

Ah damn, well if not a night away maybe a lovely afternoon walk or something with your little one. Something you will both enjoy and that will leave the hung over man to clean up his own mess.

@RandomMess

Why did you expect him to become a different person when you had DC? Was it even discussed before TTC?

Because it’s not unreasonable to expect someone to grow up and act responsibly after they’ve had a child? The op’s managed to

@LtDansleg sadly you will find that so many people are misogynistic and you know it's only the Mum's life that is impacted by having a baby.

We don't know the man in question, is he usually all talk and no change etc?

Do you think people massively change when they marry? If they were serial cheats pre marriage why would a wedding change that?

Sure it's a reasonable expectation that people change when they have the responsibility of parenthood but very many don't.

‘To be pissed’ means you are very drunk. Do you mean you are pissed off?

@Catlover77

‘To be pissed’ means you are very drunk. Do you mean you are pissed off?

@Catlover77

Depends where you’re from.

I have Canadian family (Dad is Canadian)
Pissed means annoyed ☺️

I get pissed at people. We all do. Someone just doesn't realise that to be pissed is not just drunkenness.

YANBU but also YABU as if you haven't been having a good social life and going out etc then that is your choice. Unless he has stopped you. In which case your problems are deeper than him just being selfish. Which he is. Clearly.

OP ...

think about whether you want to live with a man like this...

You deserve better 🌸