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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should dogs be allowed in more places?

538 replies

Patchworkknitter · 05/08/2021 17:44

I'm a bit hurt today but I don't know if I'm being completely unreasonable.

A friend and I were trying to arrange to meet up. We had sorted what we were doing and then she changed her mind and wanted to change where we did something which would have added another 90 minutes onto the day.

I couldn't do that as my dog would already have been left all day (with 2 dog walks from a dog walker). Even with the dog walker, he couldn't do another 90 minutes. My friend got a bit cross and said I should just get my parents to look after him but they're already looking after him the day before so it wouldn't be fair. I don't like to ask them too often, a bit like people don't like to look after their children too often.

It just seems we always do child friendly places (I'm not a Mum but I try my best to be understanding of her childcare needs). She says she can't afford any additional childcare to that which she already needs for work but I can't afford additional dog care either (I pay £400 a month and don't have a partner to share any costs).

It got me thinking how restrictive it can be having a dog as a single person. I wouldn't change him for the world but it's incredibly difficult. If it was childcare I feel people would be much more understanding.

If I was a mum I could take my children pretty much everywhere.
As a dog owner, I can no longer go to the cinema, to most pubs, to restaurants, to the theatre, shopping, etc without paying out for extra dog care.

I feel dogs should be allowed in more places, more shops, more cafes, more pubs etc. Aibu?

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 05/08/2021 18:16

I could leave my dog to go to the pub or cinema. Maybe you are being a bit precious?

Flomoon · 05/08/2021 18:17

No thank you, my friend is allergic to dogs and its already a pain in the arse trying to find somewhere to go where dogs aren't permitted. I picked her up a few months back as someone got on the bus she was on with a dog, and drove her home. She doesn't complain about it, but it must get tedious. People might find human children annoying, but I don't think anyone is allergic to them?

MaMelon · 05/08/2021 18:17

No - there are enough dog friendly places already. You chose a dog over a tortoise or a rabbit or a fish or a cat or any other pet you could have chosen - you live with the consequences of that choice.

HeckyPeck · 05/08/2021 18:17

@AtticusHoysAnus

Nope Plenty enough places as it is.

They're animals not humans.

Humans are animals 🙂
Twylar · 05/08/2021 18:18

YABU

purplesequins · 05/08/2021 18:19

yabu
imo dogs sre allowed to far too many places already and that's not of benefit to the dog either.
if a dog (or any other pet) doesn't suit your life then you shouldn't get one. it's unfair to the pet.

Grellbunt · 05/08/2021 18:20

@Suzi888

YANBU we are lucky to have many dog friendly places near to us.

“Unlike human children your dog isn't necessary for the survival of our species.”’😆🙄oh my word. It’s not a good thing, the human race is a plague!

I knew somebody would come on and say this. Don't be ridiculous.
Glenthebattleostrich · 05/08/2021 18:20

Personally i prefer a well behaved dog to kids in many places. As things have opened up Ive seen someone change their child's shitty nappy on a cafe table while they waited for a take out, had a child come over and help themselves to my chips and at a softplay did indeed see a child shit in the playframe.

Luckily we have loads of dog friendly options near us. There are also plenty of child friendly and adults only / no dogs places.

As an aside, we do sometimes hire a local teen to dog sit on an evening so we can go out. £15 and access to Netflix and a full fridge!

ItzANoFromMe · 05/08/2021 18:20

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

thevassal · 05/08/2021 18:21

"If I was a mum I could take my children pretty much everywhere.
As a dog owner, I can no longer go to the cinema, to most pubs, to restaurants, to the theatre, shopping, etc without paying out for extra dog care."

  1. most people wouldn't want to take their kids to the pub, theatre, nice restaurants etc as part of a meet up with adult friends
  2. you can leave a dog on their own for a fairly long time, you can't leave a child unattended at all! So it's completely different
  3. don't think anyone's ever been seriously injured or killed by a rabid baby biting/attacking them!
pinkcircustop · 05/08/2021 18:21

YABU. It’s just an animal and you cannot compare it to a child.

Your dog is not your child. It’s your animal, and nobody else should have to deal with it.

OhRene · 05/08/2021 18:23

@Patchworkknitter

I'm guessing I'm not going to get any understanding here.

Thank you.

That would be because you think a dog is the equivalent of a human child. I have had dogs all my life and yet I would pick a human child's life over a dog's every day, even if it was my own beloved dog and a stranger's child.

As someone who has lost a dog who was my best friend and lifelong companion, and someone who has also lost an actual child I can say you are wrong. Completely wrong. And ridiculous.

HeckyPeck · 05/08/2021 18:23

@pinkcircustop

YABU. It’s just an animal and you cannot compare it to a child.

Your dog is not your child. It’s your animal, and nobody else should have to deal with it.

It is worth thinking about how a person who's said they can't have children and their dog is the closest they'll have might feel about that comment?
Original poster
Patchworkknitter · 05/08/2021 18:24

Ok I'm out. Thank you.

OP posts:
Floods123 · 05/08/2021 18:25

Depends where you live I guess. Here in the Southwest its unusual for a pub or a cafe not to allow dogs.

LadyCatStark · 05/08/2021 18:25

As a dog owner I still say YABU. Imagine trying to navigate a shop full of dogs. Your dog might be perfectly behaved but mine’s a puppy and he’d be a bloody nightmare. Of course, I wouldn’t take him but some people would and some people have out of control adult dogs too, which would be even worse!

HeckyPeck · 05/08/2021 18:25

Sorry everyone is being so horrible to you OP. Some people seem to delight in it.

HyacynthBucket · 05/08/2021 18:26

Batshittery
Your comment says it all. OP - No, dogs should not be allowed in even more places than they are now. I don't think they should ever go into places where food is served, on hygiene grounds. And as for dress shops - urgh!

bunnybuggs · 05/08/2021 18:26

I don't understand how you are not able to leave an adult well-adjusted dog for up to 5 hours at a time. This is the norm for most dog-owners - if your pooch has separation anxiety and cannot be left more than a couple of hours - you need to work on that.

I am a dog owner and lover but I feel that some dog owners are becoming too entitled insisting on going where they want with their 'fur baby'.
It is bad enough in parks and children play areas and the beach where untrained dogs are let run around offlead (expecially if large notices say 'dogs to be kept on leads' )

SoupDragon · 05/08/2021 18:27

@HeckyPeck

Sorry everyone is being so horrible to you OP. Some people seem to delight in it.
"Everyone" is not being horrible.
Sunshinedaisymeadowsxx · 05/08/2021 18:27

@Patchworkknitter dogs can be left alone for 4/5 hours plus with no issues! If your dog can’t be alone for a couple of hours you need to train it to be able to do
So!!

bigbluebus · 05/08/2021 18:29

It's the sacrifice you make when you decide to get a pet. Just like you have to make sacrifices when you have children. If you don't want to have to work your life around a dog - don't get a dog.
I don't want dogs everywhere that I go. I like dogs - but only well behaved ones. I don't want to go to places that smell of dog or find a dog sniffing around me when I'm eating. I like dogs but wouldn't get one due to them being a tie. It's a choice you have to make.

CreateACulture · 05/08/2021 18:29

@Patchworkknitter

I'm guessing I'm not going to get any understanding here.

Thank you.

I'm allergic to dogs. You increasing your options by taking your (non-paying) dog to pubs, restaurants, cafes etc. would limit the options of people like me (paying customers). Your dog is an animal, it does not take precedence over humans, I think that's pretty easy to understand.
Sparklingbrook · 05/08/2021 18:29

@HeckyPeck

Sorry everyone is being so horrible to you OP. Some people seem to delight in it.
Pointing out the problems=horrible? Confused
RickJames · 05/08/2021 18:29

My Bichon is non-allergenic (my friend is dog allergic and cuddles her constantly with no consequences, other dogs give her a pumpkin face/ sneezing) . My new puppy isn't - thanks to the posters that brought this up. I hadnt really considered this. On the other hand they'll have company with each other if we go out without them. Crap, new puppy/ friend - how will that work out??

One of the reasons I just stick my Bichon under my arm and take her everywhere is because she would be lonely at home and she literally snoozes on my lap or on the floor if we hang around. She is permanently underwhelmed.

MN is great sometimes in getting you thinking about things.