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Original poster

Flamingo Land suitable for a baby?!

184 replies

sofiegiraffe · 04/08/2021 18:32

Please help me settle this disagreement with my OH. We have 3 older kids between us (his two aged 14 & 11, mine aged 15), and a baby together. He wants all 5 of us to go on a family day out to Flamingo Land. I've never been. He's insisting it's suitable for all the kids including the 4 month old baby? To me it looks just like a theme park - I can't think of anything I'd rather do less with a baby tbh. He thinks we'll all have a lovely family day out. I don't - I think he should just take his eldest two (and my eldest if she wants to go) and I'll stay home with baby. He thinks I'm being miserable and unreasonable. Help?!

OP posts:
ToykotoLosAngeles · 04/08/2021 21:10

I can understand that - I was more responding to the implication that people had plucked the idea of entertaining a 4 month old out of nowhere as opposed to something you had actually written!

To be honest if they are 14, 15 and 11 your DH doesn't need to go on everything with them each time. I'd actually insist on being not being left with the baby all day except for 5 minutes between rides.

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/08/2021 21:12

I'd just feel anxious to deal with it alone in such a busy place I think.

And your partner isn't going to step up? So he's focused on his fun with you there as what? Decoration?

ToykotoLosAngeles · 04/08/2021 21:15

@MrsTerryPratchett

I'd just feel anxious to deal with it alone in such a busy place I think.

And your partner isn't going to step up? So he's focused on his fun with you there as what? Decoration?

I think she means if there is (inevitably, it's August) an hour-long queue and she is alone when the baby gets distressed.
MrsTerryPratchett · 04/08/2021 21:16

Oh I know @ToykotoLosAngeles but I suspect she'll be default parent regardless.

senoritarita · 04/08/2021 21:18

Well there nothing much to do with a 4 month old other than baby classes. But that's no good for a family so just go with it

QforCucumber · 04/08/2021 21:19

We went 2 weeks ago, on a Sunday. And were pleasantly surprised at how not packed it was. Ds is 5 and other ds is 11 months. It was a lovely day out.

Flamingo Land suitable for a baby?!
ToykotoLosAngeles · 04/08/2021 21:20

@MrsTerryPratchett

Oh I know *@ToykotoLosAngeles* but I suspect she'll be default parent regardless.
Yeah, I'm not 100% sure that it's actually less about family time and more that he doesn't want to be solely responsible for the moods and demands of 2 teens and a tween!
shouldistop · 04/08/2021 21:22

Yeah, I'm not 100% sure that it's actually less about family time and more that he doesn't want to be solely responsible for the moods and demands of 2 teens and a tween!

Or he's trying to encourage his partner to have a nice day out with them as he knows she's been feeling anxious lately?

BunnytheFriendlyDragon · 04/08/2021 21:22

Well what exactly do you propose instead! It sounds like you just don't want to go out with them.

Of course the baby can't do much but the older ones can go on the rides while one of the adults looks after the baby.

You can all walk around the zoo together, go somewhere to eat...

BunnytheFriendlyDragon · 04/08/2021 21:25

You could find somewhere to sit and feed baby as needed or will she settle in the pram?

I understand it would be a bit dull if you are alone the whole time so make sure your OH knows that he needs to help.

TwoMountains · 04/08/2021 21:26

I think, as theme parks go, Flamingo Land is one of the best to go to with a baby.

It’s much more fun (for the adult minding the baby, at any rate) to take the baby around the zoo than to take the baby on a walk past a load of rides.

IHaveBrilloHair · 04/08/2021 21:27

Going out and about is good when you have anxiety.
Going somewhere really expensive and not hugely set up for you, will not help.

They should go on their day out, and plan a few short, less stressful trips out over the next couple of weeks.

I've been dealing with my own anxiety and trying to get out more, a busy theme park, or even zoo is not the place, not only are they busy, they're expensive so a lot of pressure not to leave.
Take it at your own pace, ease yourself in with local things.

ChittyChittyBoomBoom · 04/08/2021 21:29

The thing is, what kind of day out can you actually do that caters for a 4 month old and the 15yo?

I’ve got an 8yo and a 14yo and that can be tricky enough (although getting easier now) and if you’re not careful you’re just going to end up splitting the family and doing different days out.

Your baby is at a great age right now to be portable and just enjoy watching the world go by. Yes, I’d begrudge paying £40 to do nothing but look after the baby but I think it’s worth sucking up for the sake of your new family unit.

NigellaSeed · 04/08/2021 21:33

I think a 4 month old won't know where they are. They don't care, they'll be happy in a pushchair wherever. Join in with your family.

Barbie222 · 04/08/2021 21:35

To be fair, with a 4 month old, wherever you go one of you is going to be sitting it out. There aren't any days out designed around babes in arms really!

EngravedLabels · 04/08/2021 21:37

You keep saying that you don’t like rides. Have you actually looked at the rides at Flamingoland? I love going on a carousel with my dc - watching the excitement on their faces. You can do things like that while your other half stays with the baby

Original poster
sofiegiraffe · 04/08/2021 21:40

@MrsTerryPratchett

Oh I know *@ToykotoLosAngeles* but I suspect she'll be default parent regardless.

Yes when it comes to the baby I do feel like default parent. He's great with his eldest two and I never feel like he puts upon me with them, but the baby does fall to me a lot of the time. I'm not saying he does nothing at all to help - he does and he's a great support at times. But I know for a fact I'll be expected to just get on with sorting the baby while he and the older ones have a fun day. Hardly seems fair to me when I'd be better able to relax at home with the baby.

OP posts:
Mydogsbetterthanyourdog · 04/08/2021 21:54

"But then why can't it be something all of us would enjoy?"

What would you like to do all together? You must have something in mind as you've mentioned doing something you'd all enjoy.
I'd have thought the with the older ones having a new sibling to deal with youd be making an extra effort with them to do things as a family as a whole and I think your husbands idea is a good plan

Original poster
sofiegiraffe · 04/08/2021 21:57

@Mydogsbetterthanyourdog

"But then why can't it be something all of us would enjoy?"

What would you like to do all together? You must have something in mind as you've mentioned doing something you'd all enjoy.
I'd have thought the with the older ones having a new sibling to deal with youd be making an extra effort with them to do things as a family as a whole and I think your husbands idea is a good plan

My suggestion was a day out at the beach or something (obviously weather dependent). DH seems to need to spend stupid money to feel like it's been a "good" day out, whereas I don't. That's where we clash.
OP posts:
Original poster
sofiegiraffe · 04/08/2021 21:58

Also they don't have an extra sibling to "deal with" - strange choice of phrase IMO. They love their baby sister and are great with her.

OP posts:
Original poster
sofiegiraffe · 04/08/2021 21:59

@IHaveBrilloHair

Going out and about is good when you have anxiety. Going somewhere really expensive and not hugely set up for you, will not help.

They should go on their day out, and plan a few short, less stressful trips out over the next couple of weeks.

I've been dealing with my own anxiety and trying to get out more, a busy theme park, or even zoo is not the place, not only are they busy, they're expensive so a lot of pressure not to leave.
Take it at your own pace, ease yourself in with local things.

Sorry to hear you're struggling with anxiety too

OP posts:
Mydogsbetterthanyourdog · 04/08/2021 22:01

I totally get the point about the money, maybe say to him this is what your concerned about rather than going down the nothing for the baby to do route, it might make him see it differently.
I do think you might be pleasantly surprised though at flamingoland. It's not on the scale of Alton towers granted but the zoo is good and there are lots of gardens to sit in

ToykotoLosAngeles · 04/08/2021 22:07

@shouldistop

Yeah, I'm not 100% sure that it's actually less about family time and more that he doesn't want to be solely responsible for the moods and demands of 2 teens and a tween!

Or he's trying to encourage his partner to have a nice day out with them as he knows she's been feeling anxious lately?

One where she has said she doesn't want to be left to cope with the baby on her own as she is default baby parent and he's offered no assurances that won't happen?
lollipopsandrainbows · 04/08/2021 22:08

I'd seriously read the reviews both on trip advisor and flamingo land before planning a visit. It was so dire when I went a few weeks ago that I have free tickets to return, which I'll use when it isn't the school holidays. We got on two rides all day, the rest was spent queuing for rides which often broke down. Food outlets ran dry at 1 and the place was just filthy. Even with the tickets, I'm not in a rush to return.

ToykotoLosAngeles · 04/08/2021 22:16

Thing is as well, you'll be left with all their stuff. 4 rain macs, 4 extra phones/consoles/whatever they had in the car. Few bottles of water. Couple of rucksacks and a baby changing bag. You can't really go off for a walk.